Ghost Zone Experience
by Dream Trance
Summary: "I'm a weatherman, not a—Good afternoon, Amity Park! This is Lance Thunder bringing you live to what looks like a ghostly tug-a-war with our own town hero, Danny Phantom, as both the rope and opposition. Anything you'd like to add, Mr. Phantom?"
1. TugaWar

**I'm not quite sure what I was thinking when I first started writing this, but it was a hell of a lot of fun to write! hehe.**

**Hmm. I know where I'm going with the story, but it's mostly just for stress relief and something to work on when I have writers block, which I have right now. So updates may be slow. Sorry, it can't be helped.**

**Speaking of which, I've been having trouble with Halfa life, but I think I'm fixing that. I figure I'm about halfway through and I'll be able to post it in either a week or less. Hopefully. Schools been real difficult. I hate being a senior :(**

**Oh! But this story, this is Pre-PP. I was half asleep when I came up with it, so the first chapters pretty much like a crack fic, I think. Ah well. It's funny. To me anyway. Some ooc-ness. Summary at the bottom.**

**I don't own Danny Phantom. Have fun!**

***Edited 10/26/11***

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**Chapter 1  
Tug-a-War**

"Why am I even here? I'm a weatherman, not a—Good afternoon, Amity Park! This is Lance Thunder bringing you live to what looks like a ghostly tug-a-war with our own town hero, Danny Phantom, as both the rope and opposition. Is there anything you'd like to say, Mr. Phantom?"

"Dude, you seriously need to quit your job," Danny Phantom muttered into the mike that was thrust into his face, wishing death on it for interrupting his concentration.

The scene playing out was…very interesting, if nothing else. Danny Phantom, protector of Amity Park, enemy of ghosts, and savior of tree climbing kittens, was hugging a tree as if his afterlife depended on it. His face was set in a mixture of determination, fear, and a large quantity of defiance. But, even Amity's greatest hero hugging a tree wasn't as startling as the _full_ picture.

"I know! I—"

_"Stay on topic, Lance!"_ a female's voice warned from his earpiece.

"Uh." He coughed. "Well, yes. Do you mind explaining why these ghosts are…trying to pull you away from a tree?"

Danny looked over his shoulder, scowling. Fifteen or so ghosts were behind him, currently taking a break as they tried to come up with ideas on how to capture the halfa, still holding onto Danny to ensure he wouldn't escape. A little while ago, they had been pulling Danny for all they were worth, not really making Danny release his grip, but the tree looked like it wasn't too happy with the treatment. Its trunk was bending and it looked like its roots were starting to rise out of the ground. It was a bad day to be a certain oak tree.

Three ghosts—Ember, Youngblood, and Skulker—had a strong grip on his ghost tail—going with legs was a bad idea, since these were his enemies and they found the thought of him unwillingly doing the splits hilarious. They and their fellow ghosts created a long ghost body pyramid. All in all, it did indeed look like a tug-a-war; one Danny was determined not to lose easily.

"Because they can't take no for an answer," he answered the weatherman through clenched teeth.

"Just give it up, Whelp," Skulker growled, once again trying to yank Danny away from the tree. "You're going even if I have to sedate you!"

"Ha!" Danny shouted back at him. "Yeah right. You need me awake for the next few hours, Skulker!"

"Urgh! Just paralyze him already, you metal head," Kitty hissed impatiently from her place behind Ember.

"I…can't…" Skulker reluctantly told them.

"What was that?" Ember asked, her eyes narrowing on her boyfriend.

"He…uh, he built up a tolerance against them…"

"WHAT?" all the ghosts hollered. Skulker winced.

Danny threw him a triumphant smirk. In response, Skulker gave his tail a strong pull, putting his whole body into it. Danny let out a surprised yelp and almost lost his grip before regaining it.

"You idiot!" Ember yelled, giving her boyfriend a death glare and removing one arm from Danny to whack Skulker on the helmet. "How could you have paralyzed him so many times that he became immune and yet still be unable capture him?"

The metal suit seemed to pout a little before glaring and growling, "He keeps getting help from his meddlesome allies."

"Oh, and you can't take on a couple of human children, O' Great Hunter?" she mocked.

Skulker was about to retort—bad choice—but Danny spoke up before he could. "I seem to recall you losing to just _one_ of them before, Ember."

She glared at him. "She had help."

Danny rolled his eyes. "Uh-huh…"

"Enough bickering!" Johnny yelled from the back. "On the count of three we all pull. One, two, three, PULL!"

"Gah!" Danny yelped, hugging the tree with all his might and cracking the bark more. The tree seemed to sway back a little from the pressure, but didn't uproot. The ghosts stopped pulling as a unit for a moment to regain their strength. "I'm _not_ going!" Danny yelled. "Give up!"

"Oh yes you are going, dipstick," Ember said menacingly. "We did not spend two hours trying to capture your butt just so you could slip through our fingers."

"Gee, Ember. Two whole hours and all you've managed to do is corner me against a tree," Danny said in mock pity. "And it takes me what? One hour to capture you _all_ in the Fenton Thermos? That's bad. That's _really_ bad."

"PULL!" she shouted.

Danny squeaked and dug what little bit of nails he had left into the tree's remaining bark._ Sam's going to kill me for this,_ he thought, looking at the torn bark anxiously.

"Are you getting all this?" Lance whispered to Controls, holding his earpiece closer to his ear.

The woman on the other end cackled. _"Loud and clear, Lance. The audience is _loving_ it."_

"When did he get to be so strong?" Johnny demanded, exasperated. "Wasn't he, like, a geek before?"

"It was kind of inevitable, Johnny," Danny replied, rolling his eyes as he caught his breath. "You brought it on yourselves, too."

"Just let go of the stupid tree, twerp," he growled.

"No. _Never_."

"Please let go of the tree, Sir Phantom," Princess Dora called somewhere at the base of the pyramid. "Even Sir Plasmius has agreed to go."

"_He's_ going? That's _more_ reason _not_ to go!"

There was a collective groan from the assembled ghosts.

"Come _on_, Kid!" Johnny complained. "Just give up!"

"I'm not going anywhere that crazed-up frootloop is," Danny growled, his eyes flashing.

"You practically share the same territory with him, ghost child," Skulker reminded.

"Yeah, but not _willingly_!"

"You're being even brattier than me, Phantom," Youngblood commented.

Danny stuck out his tongue at him. "Like I care. I'm not going."

"Fine," Ember said. "If he wants to act like a child, we'll treat him like one. Somebody! Tickle him!" Danny's eyes widened.

_"Are they seriously…?"_ the TV woman asked, suppressed mirth in her voice.

Four ghosts flew over and immediately made the hero start cracking up.

"I can't believe he's ticklish," Lance muttered, his eyebrows raised.

After about a minute had passed, the ghosts stopped. "It's no good, Ember," Poindexter told the singer. "He won't relinquish his hold."

Danny, gasping for air, managed to say, "Of course it didn't work. I have an older sister, remember?"

"He does?" Lance and the voice asked—along with all of Amity.

"This is getting tiresome!" Technus shouted, levitating above all the ghosts. "I, Technus, Master of all technology, shall shock him until he is paralyzed and crispy!" He somehow got some wires to appear out of the ground next to Danny. Said boy went cross-eyed as they came closer.

"You idiot!" nearly all the ghosts shouted, some of them even throwing ecto-blasts at Technus. "We want him paralyzed, not barbequed!"

"Yes, and we need him to look his best," Kitty said, looking critically at Danny. "He won't be with his hair standing every which way."

Danny huffed, blowing his hair out of his eyes. He started to rub his head against the bark of the tree, effectively messing his hair up and covering it in fractured bark.

"Stop that!" many female voices cried. They pulled on his tail again and forced him to stop.

He laughed until they gave him another tug. "I'm not going, so what's it matter?" he asked.

"You _are_ going!" the ghosts yelled, pulling as a unit again.

"Gah! Lemme go already!" he cried, squirming against their hold.

"No! _You_ let go!" they shouted back.

"No!"

"Yes!"

"NO!"

"YES!"

"NO! I am staying right _here_!" he shouted.

There was grumbling from the ghosts as they allowed themselves some rest time.

"What is so bad about going anyway?" Dora asked. "There will be dancing," she added dreamily.

"One, Plasmius is going. Two, I don't even like them…well, at least not him, anyway. She's okay… somewhat. Three, _Plasmius_ will be there. Four, I have other things to do."

"Oh yeah?" Johnny asked. "Like what? You don't have a girlfriend, your friends are out of town, and we're not going to be here to fight against. What could there possibly be for you to do?

Danny flashed him a wide smile. "That's exactly it, Johnny. I get the whole day to myself. That hasn't happened since…well, since the day after Pariah invaded. No wait…yeah. That's about it."

"We haven't attacked you for two years straight," Ember disagreed, rolling her eyes in disbelief.

"Oh year? My friend kept a schedule of it…don't know why…but he did. If you want proof, just go ask him."

"Alright everyone!" Youngblood yelled. "Ready? Heave!" The ghosts pulled back. "Hoe!" The ghosts took a break. "Heave!"

"Hey! I'm _not_ a ship, Young-Butt!" Danny cried, squirming again.

"Heave! Hoe! Heave! Hoe!"

"Stop it!"

"Urgh! This isn't getting us anywhere," Ember proclaimed, letting go of Danny's tail and crossing her arms.

Danny started struggling with renewed vigor.

"EMBER!" the ghosts cried. She sighed and latched onto his tail again. Danny groaned and hit his head against the tree.

"Where are ghost hunters when you need them?" Danny grumbled.

"Well, the adults are at a convention and the girl is on vaca—" Youngblood started.

"I _know_ that," Danny interrupted. "It was a rhetorical question."

"Oh."

"Look guys," Danny said, looking over his shoulder at the assembled ghosts. "I'm not going to go willingly. This is a test of will and we all know I have more will power than you all." They grumbled a bit, but didn't deny it. "And I refuse to go. Even if you somehow made me to let go of the tree, you still wouldn't be able to get me there on time since I'd struggle the whole way." Most nodded in agreement while others—Skulker—smiled evilly. "So you should all just give up and get going before _you're_ late." The ghosts shifted and looked at each other questioningly. Danny smiled, seeing his plan working. Until…

_"Hurry! Ask them where they're going!"_ the voice in Lance's ear hissed.

"Excuse me, Mr. Phantom," Lance said, bringing the mike back into a wide-eyed Danny's face. "But where do they want you to go?"

Before Danny could answer, Skulker let go of Danny's tail and started 'cracking' his metal knuckles. Danny raised an eyebrow at him, then felt all the other ghosts suddenly let go of him too. He released the tree and traded his legs back, landing softly on the ground. If this had happened a few seconds earlier, Danny would have been out of there before they could say "whelp," but now they had…evil looks on their faces.

So Danny stayed.

"We've tried doing things nicely, Ghost Child, going against our nature," Skulker said slowly, messing a little with his wrist. "But I see that's not going to work." He glanced at Danny out of the corner of his eye and smiled wickedly. "We're _ghosts_. We should act like the no-good spirits we are." His glowing green blade shot out of his wrist. Danny instinctively got into a fighting stance. "_You're_ a hero. Act like it."

He heard a yelp from his right and whipped around to see Lance held at dagger point by one of Youngblood's henchman. Danny sighed and slumped in defeat.

"We shoulda thought of this much sooner!" Youngblood said, grinning triumphantly.

Danny shook his head, glaring at them. "That's low. You cheated."

"Oh, please," Ember said, rolling her eyes. "You're just being a sore loser."

"Now, hold out your wrist," Skulker ordered, bringing out glowing green cuffs.

Danny's eyes narrowed, and he crossed his arms. "I am not being cuffed to you, Skulker. I may be clueless at times, but I'm not stupid."

"Very well then." Skulker made a hand motion at Youngblood. The kid ghost pushed Lance into Skulker's arms. Skulker clamped one end of the cuffs to his wrist and motioned for Danny to hold out his. Danny glanced at Lance. "You better take these cuffs off when this is over," he warned Skulker.

Skulker waved his hand nonchalantly. "Of course, of course."

Danny bit his lip and sighed. He held out his wrist. Skulker snapped the cuff on, the sound a resounding click like a death toll. The gathered ghost let out a loud whoop and started cheering and shouting. "FINALLY!"

Danny just rolled his eyes, rubbing around the cuff.

_"Lance? Lance? What's happening?"_ the voice in his ear called.

"Can't you see?" Lance squeaked.

_"No. Our cameraman dropped the camera and ran off. It's only capturing your guys' feet."_

"Oh. Well, I'm about to get dragged to wherever these ghosts are going," he informed her miserably as he stared at the cheering ghosts in apprehension.

_"What? Really? That's great!"_

Lance chocked. "Excuse me?"

_"Pick up the camera quick before they fly you away!"_

"What?"

_"I'll give you a raise. A big one."_

Lance snatched the camera off the ground and pointed it two inches from Danny's face. Danny squeaked and pushed it away a bit. "So where are we going, Mr. Phantom?" Lance asked with false cheer.

"You're not seriously agreeing to this, are you? And it's Danny."

"It's my job, Mr. Phantom," Lance replied, still falsely cheerful.

Danny blinked. "Right…"

"So where are we going?"

Danny sighed. "We're going to a wedding, Mr. Thunder. The Box Ghost and Lunch Lady are about to be bound in holy matrimony…or as close to holy as ghosts get. Specifically? We're going into the Ghost Zone." He cocked his head to the side. "Most likely somewhere near Pariah Dark's castle."

_"Oh! This is _great_!"_ the annoying voice crowed in Lance's ear. _"I'm switching this over to another station so we can continue broadcasting!"_

Lance stared at the ghost teen who was rubbing his neck and smiling apologetically.

_I need a new job, _he thought despairingly.

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**Yup. ****And it's only going to get worse ) **

******So how was that? **I guess I have a warped sense of humor, but I found it funny. 

**Summary: **Take a weather reporter, a boy with too many secrets, a couple hundred hostile ghosts forced to play nice, and toss them all into the same room during a wedding. If Danny survives the day with all his secrets intact…there is always tomorrow.

**I just thought it would be fun to see how Amity reacts to the ghosts, and for them to see how the ghosts and Danny Phantom interact. And yes, that means we're going to be seeing it through their eyes too, which means Paulina, Dash, Sam, Fentons - out in the ghost convention thing -Valerie, Lancer, Jazz, ect.  
This isn't a Danny _Fenton_ is Danny _Phantom_ revealing story, not technically. It's all about the ghosts. Sorry. I may change my mind, but I like it the way it is; uncomplicated. There's enough of those stories, anyway. **

**Sorry for the oocness. Hope you'll enjoy the story! Review if you can! Thanks for reading!**

**P.s. ****The ghosts didn't turn the tree intangible because they didn't think about it. Their nerves and such were up, and they weren't thinking straight. Besides, it wouldn't be as interesting :P**


	2. Into the Ghost Zone

**And here's the second chap! And at almost my normal deadline too, back when I was consistant with Halfa Life (give it three or so days and it'll be back.)**

**To Roses 'n Horses, Trenety Fenton-Phantom, and Random Reviewer: **Thank you! Humor is what I'm going for with this. Hope this chapter's just as funny for you all.  
**MetaliHead2X4: **I haven't really thought about how I'm going to do the actual wedding, but I hope you don't mind me using that idea. The image had me laughing for a while. 'Course, I was imagining Vlad slinging an arm over Danny's shoulder and acting fatherly, giving him a father-son speech while Danny looked like he wanted to die, but still yours. lol. I'm gonna have fun with Vlad in this one. :D  
**Athena Fenton: **Yeah, I come up with original stories most of the time...sometimes...What? Anyway, I hope I did Lance's reaction justice. It's hard to say how a lone normal citizen would react to going to the GZ with a whole bunch of ghosts, but I figure fear is a prominent feature ;)  
**Kiomori: **Hello again! I agree with the Lance thing. He deseves a raise, but I'm going to make him work for it here. Unique is good, right? Nah, of course it is ;D  
**Donteatacowman: **I'm glad you enjoy my writing so much :D I like revealing stories sometimes too, but they have to be real good and actually center around the revealing for me. Otherwise it just feels like it's there for the fun of it and it's all spoiled. Anyway, you're welcome! Thank you for reviewing :D  
**Ali Phantom: **The trees a tough big guy. It'll be fine, I'm sure ;) I like hearing about the news and decided to write something about them. That's where this whole idea came from. As for canon, this is. Just before that one before PP...can't remember its name. Updated! XD  
**Nine Reviews! Thank you all!**

**Eh,** **the begining is kind of slow because I have to make introductions to all the ghosts so the audience and Lance will know who's who. It picks up later.**

**Also, Danny reveals more stuff about himself than he usually would in here because he's trying to calm Lance down by distracting him. It's all safe info to give, so he doesn't really see any problem with it. Besides, Sam and Tucker aren't there to tell him to shut up. Just so you know.**

**I no own Danny Phantom.**

***Edit 10/26/11***

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Chapter 2  
Into the Ghost Zone

Danny leaned casually against a wall as Skulker inspected the Specter Speeder. Lancer stood nervously by the hero's side, fearfully watching the remaining six ghosts looking around curiously. The ghosts touched nothing. Either they were wary of messing with ghost hunting equipment or of Danny's glare whenever they got too close to something. Either way, they were wondering around aimlessly, and it was making Lance nervous.

"Uh, Mr. Thunder?"

Lance whipped the camera around, and Danny flinched away from the too-close camera. The ghost boy took a step back and regained his composure. He gave the weatherman a concerned look. "Y-y-yes, Mr. Phantom?" Lance stammered.

"Are you alright?" he asked, tilting his head to the side. "You look pale."

That was ironic, coming from a ghost. "I'm f-fine, Mr. Phantom," he reassured, giving the young hero a shaky smile.

Danny frowned. "It's Danny." He sighed and rubbed his neck. "I suppose I should have expected it, but…" He straightened off the wall and turned completely to Lance. "There's really nothing to worry about, Mr. Thunder," he said gently, trying to be comforting and reassuring, using the voice he used for distressed victims. "They're not going to attack you or anything. Not today, at least."

Lance grasped onto this, eager to take his mind off the fact there was a dead punk boy from the eighties four feet away from him. "Why do you say that?"

Danny scratched his neck. "Well, we're going to a wedding." He made a face, but forced his facial muscles to relax again. "Ghosts rarely get married, so when a couple decides to have one, it's like a big deal for them. I'm not sure why. Probably because it lasts forever. You know, since there's no 'till death do us part'. So it's the same as the Christmas Truce, in a way. No fighting allowed."

Lance felt himself settling into interview-mode gratefully. "Christmas truce?"

Danny nodded, smiling. "It's an agreement all the ghosts made a long time ago that Christmas day was a fight-free day. Ghosts even get arrested if they break the truce. They're actually serious about it. And it works the same way with weddings, from what I understand."

"You've never been to a wedding?" Lance questioned.

"A wedding? Sure I have. My aunt's. But a ghost wedding…" He chuckled lightly. "Never."

"You seem reluctant to go. Why is that? Most would figure you would be happy to have a day free from fighting. Or do you enjoy fighting?" A lot of Phantom's critics argued that was his obsession, anyway…

The ghost teen sighed and tried to rub his neck with his right hand before belatedly remembering his hand was cuffed to Lance's. He let the action fall. "I love ghost free days, actually. Finding out about the Christmas Truce made the holiday a lot better for me when it was originally spoiled with…unpleasant memories. As for why I don't want to go?" He shrugged. "It's not so much I don't want to go as I'd rather not go, if you get what I mean."

"No, I'm afraid I don't."

"I had planned to have this day all to myself." He rubbed his neck with his left hand. "I rarely have any 'me' time lately, and I was really looking forward to it. It's selfish, I know, but me, the Box Ghost and Lunch Lady aren't exactly on good terms anyway, so I figured it wasn't a big deal not go to their wedding when we can't even call each other friends."

Johnny, who was standing four feet away, staring at the lock for the ghost portal, looked up and rolled his eyes at Danny. "It's very important, kid," he said, crossing his arms. "None of us like the Box Ghost, but this is a wedding, and all ghosts have to be present. Even twerps like you."

"Yeah, I kind of got that when you all decided to force me there." Danny looked back at Lance. "Mr. Thunder, this is Johnny 13," he introduced tiredly. "A biker who has girl problems all the time because he never thinks before he speaks."

"Hey!" Johnny complained.

"Johnny, this is Lance Thunder, the weatherman reporter for Amity Park."

Johnny studied Lance curiously, making the human uncomfortable. "Weatherman? Aren't they, like supposed to stay inside and tell forecasts?"

Lance shifted awkwardly. "Yes, but we're understaffed and I usually get roped into reporting the numerous ghost attacks."

"Uh-huh," Johnny said tonelessly. "Good luck with that, man." He turned back to the controls.

Danny rolled his eyes. He stared at Lance's camera for a moment before chuckling. "I should probably introduce everyone else too, huh?"

Lance didn't want to know who the ghosts were, but his boss was screaming in his ear to agree. "Yes. That would be appreciated, Mr. Phantom."

"It's Danny." Danny pointed to Skulker who was still investigating the Specter Speeder. "That hunk of metal is Skulker, the self-proclaimed greatest hunter in all ghost-dom. He looks big and scary, but he's really just a few inches big. He's been after my…er, pelt, since we first met because he collects all things rare and unusual, or something like that."

Lance refocused the camera on the ghost teen. "Rare? Are you rare, Mr. Phantom?"

Danny's eyes widened. He coughed into his fist. "Uh, kind of, I, um, er…" He made a frustrated sound and shook his head. He put his hand on the camera and turned it to Ember, who was glaring in annoyance at Skulker. "That is Ember McClain. She's a rock star who controls people through music and has a problem with lame insults."

_"Isn't she that rock star __who__had the teen population rioting two years ago?" _his boss asked through the earpiece.

Lance's eyes widened. "Is she _the_ Ember McClain, the hottest sensation with teenagers two years ago?"

Danny grimaced at the memory. "Yup. It was a take over the world scheme she almost won." He pointed to Dora who was looking at some photos that had found their way down to the lab. "That's Dora. She's a princess in a medieval part of the Ghost Zone. She can turn into a dragon at will and I think she's ruling the kingdom now that her brother was removed from power."

"A medieval part in the Ghost Zone?" Lance questioned, sounding confused.

Danny nodded. "Yup. Aragon, Dora's brother and the ruler before her, froze time so they remained in the dark ages."

Lance nodded—although he still didn't understand it—and pointed the camera at Kitty. "And her?"

"That's Kitty. She's Johnny's off-and-on girlfriend. She has the ability to make a man disappear for up to twelve hours, and vanish completely if they stay that way for too long." He made a face. "They fight. A lot." He was about to point to Youngblood, but paused and smiled sheepishly at Lance. "There's also Youngblood, but you can't see him. Only kids can. You would have to act like one yourself to see him."

Lance pointed in the general direction, but, like Phantom said, couldn't see anything. "Oh."

"Yeah." Danny chuckled and rubbed his neck. "He had me thinking I was going crazy once." He pointed to Desiree. "Desiree is a wish granting ghost and don't," he gave the weatherman a stern look, "_don't_ say 'I wish' on this trip. She'll just turn it all around and eventually cause the whole world to fall apart. No joke."

Lance had been on the verge of saying "I wish I wasn't here", but decided to keep that to himself.

Danny tried to hook his hands behind his head before remembering he was a bit attached to someone. He sighed and let his hands fall. "And that's all for now. The others left to fetch the remaining runaway ghosts." He laughed. "It's sort of weird to see my enemies being the 'good guys' for once. Kind of refreshing."

"Yo, Phantom," Johnny suddenly called, raising a hand to get his attention.

"'Course, it's also annoying." He sighed. "Yeah, Johnny?" Danny walked towards him with Lance trailing reluctantly behind. "What is it?"

"Can you open this thing now?" he asked, pointing to the genetic lock.

Danny raised an eyebrow and looked at the closed portal. "It's closed." He hadn't noticed before. "Why'd you close it?"

"We didn't close it, kid," Johnny said. "We didn't come through this way."

"You didn't? How'd you get out here then?"

"We went through a natural portal Clockwork told us about."

"And you didn't take the usual way, because…"

"Because it was locked, of course."

"That never stopped you before!"

"Your—umph!" Danny had clamped a hand over Johnny's mouth to keep him from finishing with '_your father wasn't opening the door!'_

"Hush!" Danny growled, throwing a meaningful look at the camera in Lance's hand.

Johnny, who had looked incredibly angry, suddenly looked like he understood. Danny removed his hand, and Johnny smiled down at him. "I forgot you had a secret to keep, kid."

Danny shrugged, though he looked uneasy. "Yeah, well, don't forget again." Suddenly the thought of Lance and a camera going into the Ghost Zone was very unnerving. Who knew when a ghost would randomly speak up about his hybrid state? He winced at the thought. He really didn't want to experience that again.

"Okay, okay. I'll open it." He looked around, gasped—badly—and pointed dramatically behind them. "Look! A…a ghost!"

Lance and the camera looked quickly while Johnny just looked confused. Danny ignored them and turned his glove intangible, pressing his thumb to the genetic lock. The lock scanned his fingerprint and accepted it, the ghost portal doors opening with a barely audible hiss. Danny snatched his hand away from the controls as Lance spun around to face the portal. The weatherman slowly turned the camera to face the controls and Danny, who smiled innocently back.

"What did you do?" he asked the ghost.

"Nothing, nothing." Danny waved his hand dismissively. "Skulker!"

Skulker had just gotten down on his knees to inspect the underneath of the Speeder. He jumped at Danny's loud call, banging his head loudly on the undercarriage. He groaned and held his helmet while the other ghosts laughed at his misfortune. "_What_, whelp?" he growled at Danny, glaring for all he was worth.

"You almost done?" Danny asked, smiling from ear to ear.

Skulker made a rude noise, turning intangible and rising from beneath the vehicle. "Yes. This thing needs an oil change, but it'll get us all there and you two back without too much trouble."

Danny's back went rigid. "What? All of us? As in all of you, plus Lance and I?"

"Lance and me, Sir Phantom," Dora corrected gently.

"Er, right. What she said."

"Well of course, kid," Johnny said, slapping a hand on Danny's shoulder. "We don't want you escaping on us, after all."

Danny brushed his hand off, still looking confused. "Right, but why not just one or two of you?"

"Because this is more convenient, Ghost Child," Skulker snapped. He climbed into the Speeder's back. "Now let's go! We're late and I don't want to miss the chance to give the Box Ghost one last chase!"

Ember climbed in after him, shouting, "Today's his special day, you idiot! Wait until tomorrow!"

"Tomorrow is his honeymoon, though," Kitty said, crossing her arms and giving Johnny a pointed look. "It's supposed to be _romantic_."

"What?" Johnny asked, looking surprised and a little affronted. "I haven't even messed up our honeymoon yet, so why are you giving me that look _now_?" Kitty glared and stormed through the portal. Johnny groaned. "What did I do now?" He slowly and reluctantly followed her to the portal, stopping right before entering to call over his shoulder, "I'll lead the way there on my bike, kid. You know, so you don't get lost. Again." He left, missing Danny's growl.

"Hey, dipstick," Ember called from the Speeder, sticking her head out to glare at the teen hero. "Stop your growling and let's go! It's already going to be a stretch getting you to look suitable in time."

"What?" Danny demanded, looking a little dismayed. "I look fine the way I am!"

Ember gave him a look over, noting the torn jumpsuit and bark infested hair with a critical eye. "Uh-huh," she said, unimpressed. She disappeared back inside the speeder, mumbling something about a tux.

Danny rolled his eyes, but reluctantly walked over to the Speeder. He paused when he noticed all the ghosts were in the back of the Speeder and only the front seats were open. He pointed a finger at his chest. "I'm driving?" he asked as if he couldn't believe it.

"It's not like we know how to operate this piece of trash," Ember commented, managing to kick the front seat.

"To not be surrounded and pressed up against us would make the human more comfortable as well," Dora added, nodding politely to Lance.

Said human looked surprised, but nodded back and climbed inside with a little foreboding feeling niggling at the back of his mind. Danny shrugged and followed Lance into the Specter Speeder, sitting in the driver's seat with an excited and mischievous grin on his face.

"I don't like that smile," Ember commented, and Lance twisted in his seat to record the ghosts sitting in the back. None of them looked too comfortable, and not because of the lack of space. "It's too ghost-like for the dipstick. I think we should reconsider and have Skulker drive or something."

Danny just threw them a smirk before pulling a lever/gear-shift and starting the Speeder. The vehicle hummed to life and lifted smoothly off the ground. Lance gripped his seat and faced the front again where the glowing green ghost portal was getting steadily bigger. He started trembling, the camera shaking in his hand and probably messing up the image, but he didn't care. It had finally hit him. He was going into the Ghost Zone. _He_ was going into the _Ghost_ Zone where the _ghosts_ lived! ...no pun intended.

The weatherman gasped in fright and closed his eyes tightly as they passed through the portal, refusing to reopen them. Not that it really mattered, though, because he could _feel_ the Ghost Zone all around him. Cold, empty, desolate, suffocating, and...was that a howl?

Lance didn't realize he'd started hyperventilating until the Speeder came to a stop and a cold hand was placed on his shoulder. Lance reluctantly opened his eyes, first seeing Danny Phantom's concerned green eyes before a movement outside of the vehicle caught his attention, and he looked out the window. He screamed when he saw the swirling green, purple, and black energy/light/stuff surrounding them. A green swirl—a ghost—flew at them, moaning as it flew over their vehicle. That's when Lance finally felt himself start hyperventilating dangerously.

"The human's not taking this well at all, whelp," Skulker commented from behind, sounding annoyed. "I'd still be able to smell his fear if I were a mile away."

Lance whimpered, frantically searching for the ghost that was sure to be tracking him down because of his fear.

Danny glared at Skulker for a moment before digging around in a cluttered compartment in search of a paper bag. "You have got the emotional sensitivity of a rock, you know that, Skulker?" He finally found one and gave it to Lance, who gratefully took it, setting the camera down on the dashboard so he could put the brown bag to good use.

"I don't care, just calm the human down," Skulker growled. "I can barely breathe back here!"

"You _can't_ breathe at all."

"You're missing the point, Child!"

Danny rolled his eyes and searched out the window for Johnny's bike. "I thought you liked the smell of fear."

"Not when I can't hunt the prey down!"

Lance's breathing—which had started to calm down—sped up again, the bag expanding and contracting rapidly and doing little help.

Danny sighed. "You should really shut up, Skulker." He jerked his right arm towards himself, tugging Lance's left and catching his panicked attention. Danny looked him straight in the eye, his green eyed stare somehow calming the man down enough to hear him say, "You'll be alright, Mr. Thunder. Remember what I said about there being a truce? There's nothing to worry about. Those no-shape spirits aren't going to come after you—think of them as small dogs, I guess. All bark and no bite."

"Like a Yorkie?" Lance asked...well, squeaked.

Danny raised an eyebrow. "Uh, sure...I think. And the Zone is just like Outer Space. You get the same feeling of nothingness out there as you do in here."

"Really?"

"Yeah. Take it from experience!" Danny grinned, his eyes lighting up at the memory.

Lance began to relax, able to take the bag away and look outside the Speeder again, although he still got chills. He saw the camera and blushed when he realized it was facing them. All of Amity had just seen his panic attack. He picked it back up and focused it out into the green vastness instead.

_"That was great, Lance!"_ the voice in his ear exclaimed gleefully. _"The acting was beau-ti-ful! I'm sure there's not a citizen out there who doesn't feel for you."_

Lance gulped.

"Where is that idiot?" Ember snapped. She leaned into the window beside Skulker and searched outside. "He was supposed to be waiting right here for us!"

Skulker's green blade shot out of his wrist. "I'll hunt him down," he proclaimed, standing up and causing Ember to take a step back. "He can't escape me, the Greatest Hunter of all ghost worlds!"

Ember and Danny both groaned, giving each other rare sympathetic looks they would deny later.

"I-is-s, that h-him?" Lance stammered, pointing out his side.

Danny leaned over a bit to see out the window better, noticing how Lance tensed at the proximity, but ignoring it for the moment. In the distance, a bright light was coming towards them at great speed. His eyes narrowed. "Yeah, that's him."

"He might want to slow down," Desiree commented. "He will ram us if he continues at that speed."

Danny's and Lance's eyes widened. "He what?" Danny cried. He stood up, ready to stop him by force if necessary. "He can't total this! I'll be so dead! ... Er, again!"

Before the ghosts could reply, they heard a loud whoop. They all jumped when Johnny, Kitty, and his bike flew inside the Speeder and stopped inside of it with a dramatic flourish of the back tire. Johnny threw Danny a taunting smirk, turning the handles and making the motorcycle engine rumble loudly.

"Try to keep up, kid," he challenged casually, and turned the handles again. He did a wheel-y inside the Speeder and zoomed out the other side.

Danny looked down at the tire marks he had left behind on the Speeder with something akin to horror. His eyes narrowed. He dropped back heavily into his seat. "He's going to regret that," he said quietly, messing expertly with some controls.

"Uh, why are we letting the dipstick drive again?" Ember asked, her eyes widening as the Speeder started to hum louder and shake a little.

Skulker was too busy watching Danny work with great interest to answer her. He wordlessly grabbed onto a handle. "It was your idea."

Danny grinned, and buckled himself in. "You may want to put on your seatbelt, Mr. Thunder." The weatherman had already done so and was currently searching for an "oh-crap" handle.

The ghosts' eyes widened.

"You better not be thinking of doing what I think your thi—" Ember began.

Danny slammed on the gas and the Speeder lived up to its name.

"PHANTOM!"

* * *

**Aren't introductions fun? XD That's it for now. Thanks for reading and leave a review if you can!**


	3. A Ride Through the Zone

**Allo, I'm back! **

**And to the reviewers!  
Donteatacowman:** I'm glad you liked it :) Does this one live up a bit more to the legacy? ;) lol. I'm not sure if it';s correct now either. I'm used to having to say "someone and I" that I figured it went like that too. But I can see why it may not work out right. Still, do you mind if I leave it? I like Dora correcting him. Thanks for the review!  
**Kiomori:** I'm glad the intros weren't boring ;) I wonder how they recieved them too. I think I know how I want things to end for Lance, and it's not a sad/depreaving ending. You can be the judge of Dany's driving ;) Have fun reading!  
**Trinity Fenton-Phantom:** Hee, I'm glad the intos were funny for you :) You're going to see 'em all! I'm going to have a lot of fun with all of them :D  
**Little bit 1o1: **lol. Hope you laugh as much with this one! Lance is seriously going to have high bloodpressure by the end of this, I brt ;D  
**peppyment:** Yeah! I've gotta use that! 'Course I'll have to make sure Frostbite's either not there or too busy, but it's a good idea! Hope you don't mind me using it :)  
**To Roses 'n Horses, Random Reviewer, and NinjaSheik: **Thanks for the support! Here's the next update!  
**Thank you all for the encouraging reviews! I hope you like this chapter as much as you did the others!**

**My writing is really poor in this story, I realize. I may go over it to fix it later. I don't know. It's more for entertainment and stress relief than good writing, anyway.**

**Okay! I don't own Danny Phantom. Just this little fun story.**

**Have fun! See ya at the bottom!**

***Edit 10/26/11***

* * *

**Chapter 3**  
**A Ride Through the Zone**

"PHANTOM!"

"I'll kill you for this!"

"Please slow down, Sir Phantom!"

"Whelp! If you crash—!"

"Yahoo! Go faster, Phantom!"

"SHUT UP, YOUNGBLOOD!

Danny just laughed in delighted excitement and followed Johnny through a rocky tunnel. He corkscrewed around some stray rocks, causing the ghosts to shout loudly again. Lance was looking like a ghost himself and was currently starting to break the camera handle. There was no "oh-crap" handle, so he was forced to hold onto his seat one-handed. Sadly, that too wasn't holding up too well.

"Slow down, dipstick!" Ember shouted. She wasn't by a handle so she was desperately clinging to Skulker's arm, the metal suit groaning from the pressure. "You're going to crash!'

The Speeder narrowly avoided an incoming rock, making all the passengers gasp.

"I won't crash," Danny disagreed, rolling his eyes. "You all should know I am an excellent flyer."

"That's when you're _flying__,_ not when you're _driving_!" Skulker pointed out, watching the Ghost Zone with unnaturally wide eyes.

"Is there really a difference in this thing?"

"YES!"

"But it's 'flying' too."

"It's bulkier than you are, Whelp," Skulker growled. "You are skinny and agile which makes you a fast flyer. This is not skinny. You don't know how to handle it!"

Danny frowned at his words. He smirked. "We'll see about that, now won't we?" Johnny led them into a rock field and instead of slowing down, Danny sped up.

The Speeder was instantly filled with curses, shouts, screams, and death threats as it smoothly—but barely—dodged the rocks in the rock field coming towards it. Danny would have rolled his eyes at their backseat-driving, but he was too excited to do so. Lance felt his bladder ready to explode, but the voice in his ear piece was yelling excitedly for him to capture everything at once.

Two rocks suddenly began to move closer together in front of them, creating a very small gap that was steadily shrinking. Johnny slipped easily through it, but Speeder was a larger than his bike. Danny looked thoughtful for a moment before he pushed the gas pedal harder. The passengers screamed, but they made it through the gap just as the rocks closed behind them.

Danny had a very wide grin on his face. "This is kind of like avoiding asteroids in an asteroid belt! There's more like that, right?"

All the ghosts groaned.

Danny laughed. "You can consider this revenge for all the crap you put me through for two years, if it makes you feel better."

"It doesn't!"

He shrugged. "I tried." Johnny led them out of the rock field and Danny allowed the Speeder to slow down slightly.

"What about Dora?" Ember demanded, pointing a finger at the wide-eyed princess. "She's your ally and never did anything to you!"

"I beg to differ."

"That's right!" Youngblood exclaimed, holding up his hook. "She captured his mate that one time!"

Danny raised an eyebrow and looked at him through the rear view mirror. "Mate?" he asked in confusion.

"He means she kidnapped your girlfriend, dipstick, now eyes on the Zone!"

"What?" Danny shouted, ignoring Ember and glaring at Younblood. "She wasn't—isn't my girlfriend! We're just friends!"

"Aw," Desiree cooed. She pointed a finger at Danny's flaming face. "He's embarrassed. Look! He's blushing!"

"I am not!"

"Eww!" Youngblood moaned. "Phantom really does have a mate!"

"I do not have a mate—er, girlfriend!"

"Hmm. I'll have to change my strategy," Skulker said thoughtfully. He began messing with the computer on his arm, making future plans.

"You leave her alone!"

"Ooh! He's protective too!"

"That's got nothing to do with it, Desiree!"

"He must have had a crush on her for a long time," Ember commented, smirking. "Even I saw it when I first met the dipstick."

Danny growled and jerked the Speeder to the right, causing the passengers to yelp in surprise. "Shut up! We are just friends! Why can't people get that?" he shouted, his eyes flashing dangerously.

"...Someone's in denial."

Danny glared hard at them.

_"Lance!"_ the boss cried. _"What are you waiting for? Ask him about his girlfriend!"_

Lance gulped. He would much rather not, but it was his job... "M-Mr. Phantom," he began shakily, "W-who are they t-talking about? You have a girlfriend?"

Danny let out a frustrated groan and dropped his head onto the steering handles.

"EYES ON THE ZONE!"

Danny jolted back upright and pushed down on the steering, the Speeder doing a nose dive just in time to dodge two rocks and a door. He pulled back up sharply an inch from the ground and rose above the outstretching hands in the ground.

He smiled a little as the passengers breathed out sighs of relief. "Well, that wasn't so bad."

"Do you even have a license?" Ember demanded, kicking his seat.

"Hey!" He glared at her. "No, I don't."

"You don't?"

"Nope."

"Are you not old enough?" Dora asked, messing with her hair nervously.

"I'm old enough, I just never got the time," Danny replied. He gave them a significant look. "Guess whose fault that is."

Ember, Skulker, Youngblood and Desiree just shrugged.

Lance coughed, catching Danny's attention. "Is there a driving license for Ghosts in this...place?"

Danny's eyes went wide and he coughed. "Uh, yeah, there is."

"No there's not!" Youngblood shouted.

"Shut up, Youngblood!"

_"The girlfriend, Lance! Ask about the girlfriend!"_

"Uh, and about your, um, girl...friend?" Lance asked hesitantly.

Danny sighed in a long suffering way. "We're just friends," he said quietly.

"Uh, right."

_"Ask more about her!"_

"Um, is she human or ghost?"

"What?" Danny frowned at him.

Lance began twitching nervously. "D-do you pr-prefer g-g-ghost or h-human girls?"

Danny blinked.

Ember laughed. "Probably humans. He hangs out with them more than us!"

Danny rolled his eyes. "That's not true. I hang out with a ghost at least once a day."

"Ghost fights don't count, dipstick."

He shook his head. "I don't just fight, you know. Or, you would if you would stop trying to take over the world for five seconds and just hang around _peacefully_."

Ember snorted and crossed her arms. "Yeah right. You're too busy with your human friends to have any ghost ones."

_"Oooh! Is she jealous?"_

_I am _not_ asking that,_ Lance decided.

"What's wrong with having human friends?" Danny demanded.

"Nothing, nothing."

He frowned at her before rolling his eyes. He shrugged. "I never thought about it, actually."

_"Ask him if he's ever had a girlfriend!"_

Lance groaned. He was asking too much as it was!

"Hey," Danny said, looking behind him. "Where are we going?"

"EYES ON THE—"

"Yeah, yeah," he cut them off, rolling his eyes and facing forward again. "Eyes on the Zone. You're a bunch of babies."

"Or maybe your driving just sucks," Youngblood commented.

"What?" Danny demanded, turning in his seat again to glare. "My driving does not suck! I haven't even crashed—"

"LOOK OUT!"

Danny gasped and jerked the Speeder to the right. The large rock that had been hurtling towards them passed through the frame, just missing Desiree by an inch. Within seconds, the rock was gone and they all breathed a sigh of relief.

Danny sighed before grinning into the mirror. "Technically, not a crash."

The ghosts groaned unhappily.

Lance stared at the spot where the rock had "pierced" the Speeder with wide eyes. "Wh-what just happened?"

Danny followed his gaze and smiled sheepishly. "Oh yeah, I forgot to tell you. In here, humans are the ghosts. Real World items and humans themselves pass right through things. If the Specter Speeder were to crash, you would be alright."

Lance gaped at him. That only made him feel marginally better about the speed they were traveling. Now he had a problem with being called the 'ghost'…

"That's all well and good for the human," Ember griped, "but what about us? We aren't going to pass right through things."

Danny grinned. "True. What's your point?"

"So slow down!"

Danny shook his head. "Johnny is going fast too," he reminded. "If I slow down, I'll lose him and have no clue where I'm going."

"I could lead you then, Sir Phantom," Dora said, frowning.

He frowned too. "I like this better. Besides, I'm not going to crash."

"You don't know for sure, though," Desiree pointed out.

"I doubt I will."

"Yeah, but—"

"Houston! Asteroids!" Youngblood cried, pointing out the front window.

The ghosts groaned to each other and Danny grinned with excitement. He sped the speeder up. "Hold on!" he shouted.

Danny pouted.

The ghosts grinned.

And Lance nervously sped the speeder up a little more to keep up with the large blue dragon.

Danny sighed and lifted the camera up, twisting in his seat to film the ghosts behind him. "Are you all happy now?" he demanded. He didn't bother with a seatbelt since Lance was practically driving at twenty miles per hour. Dora had to stop and wait every so often.

"Yes," Desiree said, fixing her hair.

Ember smirked. "Definitely, Dipstick."

Skulker shrugged. "I don't care whether you drive or not, Child." They all rolled their eyes at that.

Youngblood pouted, though. "It was going great until you had to crash, Phantom," he accused.

"Shut up, Youngblood!" the ghosts yelled.

Danny sighed. "It wasn't a crash. The Speeder wasn't even smashed."

"No, but we were nearly knocked out of this thing," Ember pointed out, scowling. "Twice."

"Three times," Desiree corrected.

"Whatever."

"But you _weren't_," Danny said.

Desiree smirked. "Forget it, Phantom. You're not driving anymore."

Danny sighed again. He rubbed his neck and grinned, a little sheepishly. "Yeah. I usually get that, actually."

Ember's eyes narrowed. "What?"

"You think this was my first time driving the Speeder?" He smirked. "I drove it once before and was banned from driving ever since. I'm surprised you guys even let me drive it as long as I did. You shouldn't have let me at all. Shame on you."

"WHAT?" the ghosts shouted.

Danny laughed at their horrified faces.

"You only drove it _once_ before?"

"You could have made us crash, Whelp!"

"Dipstick!"

"Couldn't you have gone faster for your _second_ time, Phantom?"

"SHUT _UP_, YOUNGBLOOD!"

Danny just laughed harder, the camera shaking from his mirth.

Lance was still focused on driving through the Ghost Zone, but he felt himself grinning. Phantom apparently had a sense of humor and a playful side. Not malicious like the other ghosts, but more like a teenager's innocent-ish pranks.

He hoped there were bathrooms where they were going, however. His bladder wasn't teenager-proof.

* * *

**Yeah, it's very short, but it was starting to get repetative to me. Sorry. I want them to get to the wedding real soon anyway. Next chapter will be longer, I think.**

**Oh, and let me know if there is anything you want them to find out/talk about or scenarios you want to see or whatever in this story. I'm open for suggestions. **

**And besides the Box Ghost and the Lunch Lady, there really aren't any pairings. Mild DXS maybe, but no more than the show before the third season (which I've barely seen)**

**That's it! See you in four or so days! Thanks for reading and please leave a review!**


	4. Welcome

**Alright, I am really, really, _really_ sorry this took forever! That's the longest it's taken me to type up a chapter, I swear! I just hit this block and then I got back into writing Halfa Life and, well, I did eventually get back to this. I had to scrap what I had already written, but i finished, and that's what matters, right?**

**To the wonderful reviewers:  
Donteatacowman: **hehe, I liked those parts too. You're welcome for the story and thank you for reviewing :D  
**Kiomori: **I wasn't sure if that was a suggestion or not, but I did it anyway :D I'm glad you liked the last chapter so much. Hope this one lives up to it :)  
**bluegoo2: **thanks, and I can't wait for the wedding either. I've got some good ideas *evil laugh* unfortunetly, we'll have to wait until the next chapter.  
**Athena Fenton: **I plan to have Box Lunch be mentioned, but I'm not sure how that'll happen yet. However, I love the idea of Danny giving a speech! I am soo doing that! lol  
**Peppymint: **Thank you :) and the cuffs will come off. Probably next chapter. I can't see them being stuck together for the whole thing anyway. For one, it make things more difficult for me. For two, I have a better idea for Danny.  
**Shadow their wolf: **Yeah, Lance rarily gets any love and he's awsome! Well, he's funny, at least ;)  
**Hurlebibi: **hey, I remember you! :D Glad it made you laugh so much!  
**Stick fight3: **All the ghosts will be there, including the season 3 ones. I don't know how I'm going to give the weather ghost a spot light, but I'll think of something. However, Frostbite will definetly be a big player. I can just see him calling Danny "Great One!" in front of the cameras :D Dan will be there (I think) and the humans are indeed watching. In fact, next chapter may be from their point of view. That's the plan, anyway. Thanks for reviewing!  
**Dragondancer123: **I'm glad it's so fun for you! :) I try to avoid the grammar issues, but eh. I do actually need a beta and it'd be really nice of you ^-^ Thanks! However, it'll have to wait until next chapter because I want to get this one up fast as I can (I was taking too long). Thanks for the advice and offering to be a beta! (warning, though: I don't know how betas work...)  
**Kiyi15: **that's good because I found it pretty funny! :D There's a lot of revealing stories out there and I didn't want to distract this one too much by it. I will, however, make Danny jump through hoops to ensure he doesn't get his secret blown. It's just more fun that way ^-^  
**MetaliHead2x4, NinjaSheik, Trinity Fenton-Phantom, Dibbzy, deadlydaisy8o8, ThunderRiver411, Felicity, Az The Dragon, and Serial-Doodler: **thank you all for the support! I probably would have something more to say to you guys, too, but I'm being rushed. Sorry. And thanks!  
**You all are wonderful! I'm so sorry again for taking...four months to update! D: _Four_ months? Wow...**

**I had to ditch the first draft and start all over. I'm not sure how well this turned out, but I like it better than the rough draft. Hope it's still funny!**

**I don't own Danny Phantom and some ideas belong to the reviewers :)**

***Edit 10/26/11***

* * *

**Chapter 4**  
**Welcome**

It wasn't long before the Specter Speeder joined a large crowd of ghosts heading in the same direction. Dora returned to the Speeder. There was no longer a reason to guide Lance to the wedding, seeing as they had a thousand escorts now. It was so crowded amongst the ghosts, it was difficult to see anything besides the ghosts next to and in front of them and Lance wasn't too comfortable with that. So—with Danny's unnecessary permission—he flew the speeder below the crowd. This lead to Danny attempting to give a tour of the Zone.

"And over here is the…the, um…" It wasn't going well.

Dora giggled. "The Sea of Despair, Sir Phantom."

"Right. I knew that." Danny pulled the camera away from the window for a moment to point it at Lance. "You may want to go a little higher now, Mr. Thunder. Sea monster ghosts and all."

Lance's eyes widened and he pulled hard on the handles, sending the Speeder rising almost vertically from the yellow water below. Danny turned the camera back just in time to capture the gruesome sea monster ghost jumping out of the water, its jaws gaping widely in an effort to catch them. It fell harmlessly back into the water with a disappointed look and a splash.

Danny grinned and leaned back in his seat as Lance leveled out. He turned the camera back to the ghosts in the back who were looking extremely bored. "Anything you guys would like to say to the citizens of Amity Park?"

"No," Skulker said simply, not bothering to even glance at the camera. The other ghosts followed suit by shaking their heads, also not sparing more than a glance towards him.

"What? Oh, come on!" Danny cried. "You terrorize the town almost every day, and you can't even say _one_ thing?"

"Nice doing business with you," Ember said nonchalantly.

"Urgh, you're all hopeless." Danny spun back around in his seat with a pout. They were once again surrounded by ghosts and Danny was tempted to try to name them for Amity Park, but decided against it. He was bored as hell, but he wasn't _that_ bored. Yet.

"I hate road trips," he grumbled, lazily watching the ghosts pass them by. He looked back at the ghosts in the Speeder. "Are we almost there yet?"

"At the rate we're going at," Skulker said, making some calculations in his computerized arm, "we should arrive there in—"

"Fifteen minutes," Ember interrupted him, rolling her eyes. Skulker glared half-heartedly at her, but knew better than to comment.

Danny groaned. "Fifteen minutes?" He turned to Lance. "Can we go faster? Please?"

Lance sweated nervously. He really didn't want to. "Um…is that alright with all these…uh, spirits around?"

"They're ghosts, not spirits. Spirits are nearly mindless," Danny corrected gently. "But yes, it's alright. Just go 30 miles per hour. That's still slow, isn't it?"

Lance gulped, but nodded and slowly sped up the Speeder.

"_Lance,"_ the voice of his boss spoke up, _"what are you doing? Why aren't you asking Phantom any questions? This is the perfect opportunity!"_

Lance inwardly groaned, but reluctantly turned a little towards Danny, keeping his eyes securely on the 'Zone' at the same time. "Um, Mr. Phantom."

"It's Danny," Danny corrected lazily, turning the camera to point back at Lance. "Yes?"

"Is…um, is your home around here?" he asked hesitantly, pulling a question out of thin air.

Danny coughed a little in surprise. "Uh, no. Not really."

"Where is it then?"

"Um…that's kind of a secret," Danny said evasively. "Especially with my enemies right behind me…"

The ghosts chuckled a little, which Lance found weird, but didn't question. "Oh. Sorry. Can you tell me something about death?"

"Something about death?" the hero asked in confusion, his brows furrowing.

"Yes." Lance felt himself again relaxing into interview mode. He decided he'd have to do this more often on the trip. "Not much is known about ghosts and where they go when they die. Is there anything you can tell us about the death and 'life' of a ghost?"

Danny started to sweat nervously and looked at Dora for help, his eyes unconsciously getting bigger and pleading. The other ghosts smirked in satisfaction at his helplessness and Youngblood even laughed. Lance frowned, but didn't take his eyes 'off the Zone'.

Dora gave them disapproving looks before nodding at Danny. "Sir Phantom is a very young ghost, so he doesn't know much about the inner workings of the Ghost Zone, Mr. Thunder."

Danny sighed in relief. He smiled gratefully at the princess, who smiled back.

"The child should still be able to answer the basics, though," Skulker said thoughtfully, smirking at Danny's panicked look.

"Yes," Desiree agreed, tapping her chin with a manicured fingernail. "He did 'die' after all. He should know what the process is like, should he not?"

Danny glared harshly at them. He chewed on his bottom lip for long a moment, trying to think up an answer that wouldn't give too much away. In the end, he realized there was no way he could. He didn't know very much about ghosts and he didn't want to say something wrong. Not to mention, he didn't know that much about dying when it came to normal ghosts.

"I…honestly don't know, Mr. Thunder," he finally answered, shifting uncomfortably and grimacing.

Lance pursed his lips thoughtfully. "Oh? Why is that?"

"Because I, uh…I..."

"Because Sir Phantom didn't die in the usual way, Mr. Thunder," Dora explained, again coming to Danny's rescue. "His death didn't happen the way most do."

Lance's ears seemed to perk up, and the voice in his ear started yelling something about gold. "He didn't?"

Danny felt himself tensing and desperately hoped Dora knew what she was doing. He looked at her with wide eyes. The princess caught the look and winked subtly at him. He relaxed slightly, but was still on the edge of his seat.

"No, he didn't, Mr. Thunder. It is what makes him unique compared to most other ghosts."

"_Most _other ghosts?"

"There are those who died much the same way he did, Mr. Thunder."

"Oh, I see. Please continue, Miss…"

"Your highness, if you please."

"…Uh…right, your…highness."

Danny would have laughed at Lance's puckered expression if _his_ secret wasn't on the line. Lance glanced at him out of the corner of his eyes and Danny forced a smile on his lips. Lance jerked his chin towards the back of the Speeder, causing Danny to raise an eyebrow in confusion. Lance repeated the action, this time looking pointedly at the camera. Danny's mouth formed an "O" and he blushed. Sheepishly, he twisted in his seat to point the camera at Dora.

"Please continue, your highness," Lance said.

Dora nodded demurely to the camera and said, now shyly, "Sir Phantom is a unique ghost, which is why Sir Skulker here hunts him down. He wants to…"

"Rest my pelt at the foot of his bed," Danny supplied with a sarcastic eye roll.

Dora gave a small smile while Skulker glared at Danny. "Yes. That's it."

"But what makes Mr. Phantom so unique?" Lance pressed, the voice of his boss starting to give him a headache… they weren't even to the wedding yet!

"The way he died."

"Yes, I got that," Lance said, his brows furrowing in a frown. "But how _did _he die?"

Dora gasped-quite convincingly too. "Why, Mr. Thunder!" she exclaimed, shocked. "You never ask a ghost that! It's much too personal! Most ghosts don't react kindly to such personal questions!"

"What?" Lance asked, surprised and slightly afraid that he had insulted Danny Phantom. He tried to get a look at Phantom's face, but the camera was blocking the view. However, the camera was trembling a little, as if Phantom was shaking…trying to control himself. Lance's eyes grew wide and he shouted, "I didn't mean any offense, Mr. Phantom!"

The evil ghosts watched with bored expressions as Danny tried to keep from laughing. He squeezed his eyes shut and said in a strained voice, "D-don't worry, about it-t, M-Mr. Th-Thunder."

"No please, accept my apology!" Lance pleaded.

Danny restrained another chuckle and said, "'K-kay. W-whatever. Apology ac-accepted."

Lance sunk into his seat with a relieved sigh.

"_Ah," _the voice moaned in his ear. _"So close…"_

_Oh, shut up!_ Lance thought harshly.

Danny finally regained control of himself. He looked over the camera and gave Lance a bright smile. "Hey, really, don't worry about it, man. It just, uh, brought back some…uh, painful memories."

Lance nodded numbly as he continued flying through the Zone. "Right."

"…Yeah…" Danny shifted uncomfortably. He licked his lips and gave one last look at the drained and slightly depressed looking man before sighing and saying slowly, "It…was an accident."

The ghosts in the back straightened in surprise, but Danny kept his attention on Lance. The weatherman seemed to brighten as he looked at Danny out of the corner of his eye. "An accident?" he questioned.

Danny nodded and looked out the window. "Yup. I was at the wrong place at the right time doing the wrong thing." He grinned a little at Lance. "Good luck trying to make sense of that, though."

Lance nodded thoughtfully.

"_Well,"_ his boss said slowly, _"it's not the big answer we could have hoped for, but it is something! An accident, huh? Wrong place, right time, wrong action. I wonder what he was doing…"_

_So do I, _Lance thought.

Danny sighed and stretched his left arm, the one not holding the camera up. "Yeah." He looked back at the ghosts and raised an eyebrow. "But, hey. What do you guys do in the Ghost Zone? Besides create evil plots to take over the human world, that is."

Ember snorted and said, "We do more than just that, Baby pop."

"Like what?" Danny urged. "Come on, you guys." He grinned. "Amity Park wants to know what you all do for fun when you're not out terrorizing them."

"I run my kingdom," Dora said slowly.

"Is that it?" Danny asked. He winked at her. "You don't have any time to pamper your ladies in waiting or play with your suitors?"

Dora blushed, but smiled and replied, "Actually, I do that too. In fact, if you lose interest in your human friend, I am sure my ladies in waiting will be thrilled to have you court them."

Danny's face lit up like a tomato. "Dora!" he exclaimed, sounding betrayed.

The ghosts laughed and Lance found himself smiling along.

"You are so innocent, Phantom," Ember commented with a smirk. "Have you even ever been kissed?"

Danny gaped for a moment before shouting, "Of course! I'm sixteen!"

"Fake-out make-outs don't count."

"Uh…"

Skulker chuckled and said, "Yeah, and all of those were with _that_ girl too."

Danny raised an eyebrow and asked, "How do you know that?" He paused, then his eyes widened. "You _spy_ on me?"

"Of course, whelp, what did you think?" Skulker replied, sounding offended. "Part of the hunt is knowing your prey!"

"He overheard your friends talking about it," Ember said in a bored tone. Skulker glared at her, a wounded expression on his helmeted face. Danny relaxed and whispered, "Phew…"

"You seriously never kissed a girl, Phantom?" Youngblood asked as if he couldn't believe the hot-shot teenager had never done so.

"Oh, and you have?" Danny countered.

"Of course not! Girls have cooties! Way to keep yourself cootie-free, Phantom!"

Danny face-palmed.

"Looks like you're the only one here past puberty who hasn't had their first kiss yet, Dipstick," Ember said smugly, smirking in delight at Danny's pain.

Danny sulked and grumbled, "How did we even get on this subject? Weren't we talking about your spare time?"

"Yours is a lot more fun to mess with, Phantom," Desiree pointed out.

"Yeah, well, now we're getting off the topic of my temporarily misplaced love life and getting onto yours." He pointed the camera to Skulker. "Did you ever fix that problem you had with your mystery girl?" he asked with a smirk.

Skulker glared slightly at him. "You can ask her yourself, whelp," the ghost replied, jerking his chin at Ember.

Danny gaped at the dead musician. "_You're _his girlfriend?"

Ember scowled. "Yeah. Got a problem with that?"

Danny blinked. "Uh, no. My brain's just trying to wrap around how that's supposed to work…"

Ember huffed and looked out the window. Her eyes suddenly widened and she kicked Lance's seat, causing him to gasp. "Turn right, idiot. Now."

"But..."

"I would listen to her if I were you, human," Skulker advised, catching on and smirking at Danny.

Lance nodded frantically and obediently turned the Speeder to the right. "Y-yes sir—I mean, ma'am."

Danny frowned and watched the ghosts outside of the window vanish from view as they took a side trip. "What's going on? Why are we changing course?"

"We have to pick up Sir Walker," Dora answered, giving Danny an apologetic look when his eyes widened.

"Wait, _what_?" he yelled.

"Walker is the one conducting the hunting parties for the runaway ghosts, whelp," Skulker explained smugly.

"He said he would remain in his jail until you were captured, then said we were to return to get him," Ember continued. "Apparently, he doesn't think we could 'detain' you long enough for us to reach the wedding. He 'insists' that we come along so he can ensure you don't escape."

Danny gaped at them. "B-but you got me! No escape plans happening in this ghost's head!" He knocked on his head lightly, forcing a smile. "We might as well just leave him."

Ember sighed. "I wis-It's a shame we can't. That would be 'against the rules'."

Danny groaned and placed his left hand over his face. "Somebody kill me."

"You're already dead, Sir Phantom," Dora reminded.

Lance gaped up at the ghost prison. It was easily the size of the Amity Park high school, Casper High, and if he wasn't mistaken, there was electrified barb wire at the top. He saw some green ectoplasm dripping from a section of barbs and shivered.

Two guards looked down at the Speeder. One of them raised its hand, signaling to a ghost below it to open the doors. With a groan, the iron doors did just that, opening much the same way Lance was sure a human world prison would. A chill went up his spine as he drove the Specter Speeder in, the gates looming over them imposingly, like the gates of Hell, sucking away all freedom and life…

Danny wordlessly handed him the brown paper bag and reached over to steer the Speeder carefully into the courtyard. "Remember what I said, Mr. Thunder? They can't hold you in here. You can just walk right through or drive the Speeder out of here at any time."

Lance nodded, breathing more evenly into the paper bag as he allowed the information to register in his mind.

The Speeder came to a halt in the middle of the courtyard, and Danny looked around curiously. "Where's Walk-"

"Unauthorized personal in the Ghost Zone," a voice droned, causing another spike of fear to run through Lance, "that's against the rules."

The Speeder's back door opened, revealing the white skinned Walker, six feet of imposing glory. He looked around the inside of the Speeder before snapping his book shut. "What is the meaning of this, lawbreakers?"

The ghosts edged uneasily away from the warden.

"You wanted us to come back for you, Sir Walker," Dora said shyly, not meeting his eyes.

"So I did," Walker agreed, his eyes straying to Lance-who looked as if he'd stopped breathing-and to the camera in Danny's hands. "However, I didn't give you permission to bring a human and human world contraband into my Ghost Zone. Now tell me: Why are there Real world items in my Ghost Zone?"

The ghosts shrunk back in fear at his sudden yell.

"Back off, Walker!" Danny shouted, glaring at the Warden angrily. "It's not _your _Ghost Zone and it just so happens they needed all this human world 'contraband' to get me to come along. You ought to be thanking them for doing that, not yelling at them for improvising!"

Lance and the ghosts gaped at him as he and Walker had a glaring match.

"Punk," Walker growled.

"Walker," Danny replied mockingly.

"Get a good look at this prison, Punk," Walker continued, "because when that fateful day comes, this'll be your new home for all eternity."

"Ah," Danny moaned, as if it were a shame, "no execution for me? I thought that was your favorite part?"

"Don't think you won't be crushed to within an inch of your afterlife, delinquent."

"Yeah, yeah," Danny said flippantly, looking bored. "Are you coming or not? We're late, am I right?"

Walker glared one last time before stepping into the Speeder. "Drive, human," he commanded and Lance instantly obeyed.

"Didn't we go over saying 'please', Walker?" Danny sarcastically asked the warden with a smirk.

"That's not in the Rule book," Walker replied with a growl.

"It should be." Danny pointed the camera back at the window, resuming his tour of the Zone. The ghosts at the back of the Speeder sighed uncomfortably. After all, there wasn't a whole lot of room back there.

"_Lance!" _the boss yelled.

_Oh no,_ Lance thought fearfully.

"_We've got some calls coming in! They want to know about the wedding. So get asking!"_

Lance breathed in deeply before asking, "So, um, who is the Box Ghost and Lunch Lady?"

Danny looked at him with a raised eyebrow. "You don't know the Box Ghost? He's the most commonly spotted ghost in the human world."

"That would be you, Punk," Walker corrected.

"Alright, he's the second most spotted. He's blue, wears overalls, and shouts 'BEWARE!' all the time. His obsession is boxes." Lance stared blankly at the Zone. "…He once gave everyone sandwiches and free shoes."

"Oh! The caterer ghost!"

"Well, he's actually the _Box _Ghost," Danny corrected.

"And the Lunch Lady?"

"A bipolar old lady obsessed with food."

Dora coughed politely, getting everybody's attention. "That's a bit insensitive, Sir Phantom."

Danny rubbed his neck with his left hand. "Well, I don't know her that well. Do you guys have a better description?"

No one answered.

"Alright then." Danny shrugged and said, "You'll just have to wait until you meet her."

Lance nodded thoughtfully. "And the wedding? What should we expect?"

"I don't know." Danny turned around in his seat again to film the ghosts behind him. "So, guys, mind answering some questions?"

"Anything to pass the time," Ember grumbled.

"Shoot," Youngblood said.

"Okay then. Where's the wedding taking place?"

"At Pariah Dark's castle," Walker answered.

Danny blinked. "Like, right in it?"

"Where else, Dipstick?" Ember asked impatiently.

"Isn't that…you know, dangerous?"

"My guards are protecting Pariah Dark's sarcophagus," Walker said, "No one will set him free again if I have anything to say about it."

Danny grinned slightly. "Shouldn't you have done that in the first place?"

Walker frowned. "It wasn't in the Rule Book at that time."

"Uh-huh..."

"_You're going to film the Ghost King's resting place?"_ Boss lady yelled excitedly. _"This is gold! The ratings are going up, up, and up!"_

Lance whimpered.

"What about-" Danny began, but Youngblood suddenly pointed with his hook and yelled, "Land hoe!"

Danny raised an eyebrow. "What?"

"He means we're there, Dipstick," Ember explained.

Danny and Lance looked out the windshield and gaped up at the large red castle. Lightning flickered above, casting the castle in an eerie shadow. Lance shivered and sank back into his seat, his eyes wide as he stared fearfully up at the castle.

"Welcome to Box Ghost's and Lunch Lady's wedding, home to Pariah Dark, former King of the Ghosts," Desiree welcomed grandly, smirking at Danny. "This is going to be fun."

Danny groaned and dropped his head into his left hand. "Somebody kill me."

"We went over that, Sir Phantom," Dora said, but she reached over to pat him comfortingly on the back.

* * *

**I know, that pretty much sucked description wise and all that. Urgh. I hate description :(**

**I'm hoping to come back and edit a lot of this. I don't really like it and I don't feel as if I'm living up to my standards, even if it is better than the first draft. However, I'm a very mean critic when it comes to my own work so I'm relying on you all to let me know if I should do some serious changing or if it's alright. Please let me know!**

**Next chapter I plan to have Amity Park's POV. Hopefully that's what happens. :) See you all then.**

**Thanks for reading and leave a review if you can! Let me know your opinion and suggestions!**


	5. Surprise

**Ello all! This was a little slow in coming, but at least it wasn't four months, right? :D**

**To the reviewers!  
Narumi: **lol, I know how you feel! I'm taking gov. too and, urgh, I hate it...It's not terrible, it's just tedious. Dora's shaping up to be one of my favorite ghosts in this story :)  
**Martel: **Thanks! Characterization is really hard, but I'm afraid I may have messed up a bit in this one. It's in Dash's POV, and I either messed up him or Kwan...  
**Kiomori: **lol, I'm having a lot of fun with all these ghosts :D Just wait until the wedding actually gets started! I have so many ideas...cue evil laugh! Really? I still call my school a prison! But then, mine looks like it too, lol. Amity chapter here, but I'm not sure it fits in the hilarious catagorie. I only managed one view point (bummer) when I'd originally planned three, but ah well. I'm told it's still funny ;)  
**kouriel: **Thanks :) I think my average chapter length for this story is about eight or nine and I got a beta now so there's even better grammar. Yay! ;)  
**dragondancer123: **lol. I'm glad you liked that part because I had a lot of trouble with it. Try not to feel too sorry for Lance, he did volunteer ;D Thanks so much for your help with the betaing too! I may work on my other story's chapter first, so it may be a while. Just thought I'd let you know.  
**Bubbley-chan: **I wanted to read a story like this too, but couldn't find one. So I took matters into my own hands ;) Blowing his secret would be fun, but that would detract from the focus of this story which is the ghosts' interaction with each other and BG and LL marriage. Sorry, but Danny's secret probably won't be revealed. I'll work on the sarcasm. I love sarcasm too, I just have a problem writing it, I guess. Oh, and I am _so_ doing that! You don't mind, do you? It sounds like such a good idea.  
**Donteatacowman: **lol. After rereading it, it does seem kind of good. I'd skimmed over it when I'd posted so it didn't feel so good about it. It's better when I read it slow. Now I like that chapter the best...weird...I'll try to see if I can fit that angle in here. It sounds intersting, I never thought about it. You're reviews are a lot of fun the read :D You have such cool insight on things.  
**E350: **lol. Lance gets so little love it's almost criminal. He's actually a lot of fun. He's a bit more arrogant and stuck up than I portray him, but I'll subtly fix that. Thank you!  
**stick fight3: **the prison doesn't need Walker to watch over it because all the prisoners have to go to the wedding too. This is within the third season so Walker doesn't have Wulf in custody. But, yup, Wulf and Cujo are there. In fact, they're in this chapter ;) And if all goes right, Vlad will pop in very soon...;) As for Dan, he'll be a bit later, but he'll be there.  
**deadlydaisy1o8: **lol! That had me laughing for a while :D Sorry it took so long. You're review was a real cofidence booster and I really, really appreciate it. I am hard on myself a lot of the time and my self-confidence happens to be very low, so thanks! Like a lot :)  
**peppymint: **lol. Sorry. Thanks and here's the next one. :D  
**DP-shrine-in-closet-girl: **lol, glad it was so fun for you! Yeah, I'm having a lot of fun with Lance' reaction. He's so scared of everything, but he's determined to be there so it makes for an intersting position for him to be in. The camera's being a pain in the butt, but I'm excited about how everyone in Amity will react...even if i don't know yet how i'll be doing that...lol, there will be a lot more torturing going on. Poor Danny. I feel kind of bad...I'm glad you like this story too! It's nice seeing familiar "faces".  
**Thunderstorm101: **You like this story too? Sweet! I'll try to stay confident :) I'm really self-conscious so I get scared about peoples' reaction a lot. Believe it or not, I think I'm getting over it :) I really liked the description too, even though I usually don't like things like that. lol. Thanks :D  
**Serial-doodler: **lol. I'm not sure about Box Lunch yet. I know at some point she'll be mentioned, but I don't know if she'll show up. She is (_technically_) from the future that no longer exists after all, but we'll see. Maybe LL already had or is having her or...something. i don't know.  
**blugoo2: **Thanks! Yes, poor, poor Lance. Poor Danny too, but at least he has super powers ;) Glad the personalities match up. They're kind of difficult to do, but I guess they're working out right ^_^ Thanks for the review!  
**hawkflyer667: **lol, glad you like it. It's a lot of fun to write. If the characters have to be ooc compared to the show, at least they're IC for the story, right? hehe, I like that. :)  
**MiyamotoUsaqiFan: **well, i'm glad you found it! Reviews are great motivation boosters :D Well, we kind of got Amity's reaction. Some of the teenagers' reaction, anyway. I'd planned more, but the chapter got carried away and the next thing I know, I've reached my page limit. But, next chapter. Next chapter should be better.  
**Trinity Fenton-Phantom: **I like the story stering clear of his secret being blown, but I may do that. It's difficult to say at this time. I almost forgot Nocturne. I hadn't watched Frightmare at the time, though, so that's understandable. I watched it and now I have a good place in the story for him ;) Dani will be there. Dont' know about the sister thing (I like her better being his cousin), but I'm sure some people in Amity will think "oh, is that the sister he was talking about?" or something. She'll probably be the ring bearer ;)  
**Little Juniper, Garnet Sky, TweenisodeOrange, Lexie, SweetLilNothing, and Lizeth: **lol, thanks! i laugh to myself as I write it, so I'm glad it's funny for you guys as well. I liked seeing your takes on it (Vlad will come in very, very soon) and I really appreciate your support! Thanks for reviewing!  
**Thank you all! And, wow! That was a lot! You guys really like it, huh? :D**

**I promised Amity Park's view, and I half way delivered. We get Dash's and most of the teenage populations' reaction :) I'd intended to get a few more, but that didn't work out too well. Dash was really difficult and i don't think it's as funny as the previous chapters, but it still has its good points!**

**Also, I'd like to take the time to thank dragondancer123, the one who beta'd this chapter! It sounds better, trust me ;) Thanks again Dragon!**

_'space' _Dash's thoughts

_"space"_ people speaking on television.

**Sorry if it gets a little confusing. It was either that or underlining, and I didn't like the underlining. It just looked wrong. **

**I don't own DP; just this sweet, comical little story ;)**

**  
**

* * *

Chapter 5  
Surprise

Dash walked down the sidewalk. His gait was easy and laidback, like he wasn't rushing to be anywhere. His shoulders were thrown back as if he wasn't afraid of anybody or anything. His arms swung casually at his side, as if he didn't realize he was the only one out on the street at the moment. His blonde hair was sleeked back and he wore his best casual clothing; a black T-shirt with a blue circle in the middle and sleek denim pants.

Kind of a shame no one was there to see him, because he looked _awesome_. Well, he did in his mind. But that's alright; because even though no one saw him walking the streets, he would soon be the center of attention in three…two…one…

Dash casually climbed his house's steps and threw open his door, his eyes closed and his body ready to jump at just the right second…

Dash paused in the doorway with his eyes still closed, clearly waiting for something. He waited another second, giving the people inside the house ample time to realize that the star had _arrived_! But no one leaped out and yelled SURPRISE! No one threw confetti in the air or honked those ridiculous horn things at him. No one even made a half-hearted attempt at wishing him a happy birthday!

This made Dash confused and a little hurt which he quickly hid by becoming royally pissed off.

The jock snapped his eyes open and looked wildly around for the reason for his outrage.

The perpetrator: an empty room.

Dash's anger slowly faded away. That made some sense, he supposed. After all, the people celebrating his birthday may not realize that he was back yet and the 'surprise' party may actually be in a different room.

With that in mind, Dash strolled out of the room and into the hallway. His family's house was pretty big. Not really a mansion like Paulina's, but it was still a bigger house than anybody else's, and that's what mattered. After all, the most popular guy at school also needs to have the coolest house.

At any rate, it didn't take him long to find the room housing all the guests. How could he when at least five of them were gathered outside, trying to jump over the shoulders of the taller people who refused to budge further in the room? They weren't watching for him to return. His peers barely even spared him a glance. '_What kind of birthday party is this?!'_

"What's going on?!" Dash roared. The jock grabbed the closest loser's shoulder and shoved him out of his way. Fortunately for said thrown loser, another boy got in his way and cushioned his fall. Dash ignored them and continued pushing and shoving people out of his path as he made his way to the center of all the attention—which for some odd reason wasn't him. "What are you—"

"Shh!" the group shushed, the teens turning to glare at their star quarterback.

Dash's eyes widened in shock at his guest's reaction to his presence before they narrowed into a glare. "How dare you losers sh—"

"Dash!" Dash heard Kwan's voice call from within the crowd of teenagers.

The jock's face seemed to brighten when he heard his friend's voice. '_Finally, someone_ reasonable_! Now I'll get some answers_.' "Kwan!" Dash shoved another person out of his way and continued forcing his way through the crowd. "Out of the way, losers!" a nerd was pushed out of his way and into another one of his peers. The other teenager sneered in annoyance and shoved the nerd away from him. Dash barely noticed the poor nerd being pushed all over the place as he navigated through his own living room to his couch.

The crowd finally seemed to get the idea and moved out of his way; creating a path for Dash. Dash turned his nose up at them before walking—more peacefully—towards the couch where Kwan and his other football team members were reclining.

Kwan raised his arm to wave Dash over, but he was the only one to look up from the television. "Dash! You've got to see this!"

Dash glared slightly at being ignored by his own team, but he went to see what had his friend so excited. "What's going on here, Kwan? Why is everyone ignor—watching the TV?"

Kwan grinned and pointed to the TV. "See for yourself."

Dash frowned but looked at the screen. He felt a chill run down his spine and his breath caught in his throat. The picture on the screen was of a castle, a very scary one. At the moment, the picture was sweeping along the whole castle's framework as it got closer, making sure the viewers got a good view of the medieval structure. And what Dash saw made him glad that it was only Hollywood production…not that he was scared of it or anything.

"Sweet graphics," Dash commented, and no, his voice didn't tremble even a little bit. Sure, he avoided scary movies like the plague, but he could stand up to a big spooky castle with lightning in the background. '_It's not real, Baxter. It's not real…'_ "What movie is this?

Kwan smiled excitedly. He elbowed the jock sitting next to him and the guy got up, though very reluctantly. "It's not a movie, and get this; _Danny Phantom_ is being filmed live! Right now!"

"What?!" Dash exclaimed. His hero and idol was on TV and one had told him?! Dash hurriedly took the vacated seat and leaned forward, watching the TV intently. He didn't want to miss seeing his hero more than he already had.

"Well, he's not being filmed _right_ now…" Kwan began slowly and Dash felt his excitement fade away a little, "…he's the one _doing_ the filming!"

And it was back. Dash grinned. He was barely able to contain his excitement. His hero, Danny Phantom, the coolest, most awesome teenager _ever_, was currently filming…something! It was awesome! The best sixteenth birthday present ever! Well, maybe not the best—that would have been the red Ferrari he'd been begging his dad for—but it was awfully close. The only thing that could be better—besides the Ferrari—would have been if he could have talked with his hero in person.

But… "Why didn't you call me sooner?" he demanded of Kwan. Who knew how much air time he had missed with his hero? He could have seen Phantom being filmed instead of the one holding the camera. Sure, that was awesome too, but being a cameraman was too low for the greatest hero of all time!

"I never got the chance! There aren't any commercials. But, we're recording it!" Kwan placated, pointing to the DVD recorder.

"Shh!" the teenage population shushed.

Dash would have told them to shut their traps and mind their own business, but he happened to agree with them this time. He wanted to hear when Danny Phantom began talking again too.

"Recording?" Dash questioned in a much quieter voice.

"Of course!" Kwan said, also in a hushed whisper. "This is awesome! We're learning so much about him, like did you know that Phantom's death was a total accident?"

"It was?!" Dash exclaimed in a whisper, shocked. He'd always though his hero had died spectacularly, seeing as how he was such a cool dude. Like maybe by fighting off a thief or sneaking out to join the army!

"Yeah, and he's sixteen already!"

"Get out!" So Phantom was the same age as Dash?—well, starting today, just a little bit older? How awesome was that?!

"And you should have seen him—well, heard him—a few minutes ago! See there's this real creepy sheriff ghost that all the other ghosts are scared of, and when he started yelling at them, Phantom yelled back and he _totally_ put that creep in his place!"

"Awesome!" There was no way he was going to miss his hero laying down the law to some big ghost creep. Just watching his fights and hearing him taunt the ghosts was inspiring enough; imagine what it would be like to see him get a ghost to obey him just by speaking.

"And also—"

"Shh!" a cheerleader hissed from in front of the speakers. "He's talking again!"

The whole room, which had been filled with quiet chatter, quieted instantly.

_"Nice place," _Phantom's sarcastic voice flowed through the speakers, _"though it could use a little more gloom and despair. It's still much too cheery for a wedding. You should really consider issuing a complaint."_

The picture jerked forward, as if the ghost had been pushed, and they heard him grunt and a chain rattled.

_"We don't have time for your silly bantering, Whelp," _a gruff voice growled. It took Dash a few seconds, but he soon recognized the voice. It belonged to that one weird machine ghost that had hunted him and Phantom down the one time Fentonail's stupid dad had shrunk them. Despite the experience being one of Dash's scariest memories, he couldn't help remembering it fondly since that was the time he and Phantom became friends. Well, in his mind they did.

The camera and Phantom turned around and Dash was surprised to see six ghosts glaring at them…well, Phantom. A white and green strange-looking vehicle was placed behind them. '_Is that how they got there? When did they get off?_'

_"We can't be that late," _Phantom objected and Dash smirked at hearing his hero act so casual in the face of such hostile ghosts.

_"We are, Dipstick," _a hot female ghost said while crossing her arms. '_Wait…is that Ember McClain?!' "We still have to take you to the Tailor Ghost, get you into a shower, inform—"_

_"Whoa, whoa!" _Phantom interrupted, his voice slightly high pitched. _"Tailor Ghost? Shower? You can't be serious."_

_"We're dead serious, Punk," _The imposing jailor ghost assured. '_Is he the creepy ghost Kwan was talking about__?_' Dash could see why the ghosts were so freaked out by him. He was very intimidating, and if Phantom had actually managed to get him to listen to him, well, Dash's respect for Phantom just reached a new height.

The picture shook as Phantom laughed. _"Was that a pun? Why, Walker, I didn't think you had it in you."_

The ghosts groaned, their eyes rolling upward. Dash and the human teens laughed lightly. What they were saying wasn't as funny as the fact that _Phantom_ was the one saying it.

_"Sir Phantom," _The princess ghost began, _"please, we have to—"_

_"It's about time you slowpokes got here. I almost sent Johnny out to go see what was taking so long."_

Phantom spun around and the picture of a sexy ghost girl came on the TV screen. All the male teens let out a low whistle. The ghost had shoulder length green hair that was layered stylishly and she had an intimidating air about her to boot. But the other teens that were familiar with her knew she had a boyfriend. What raised their interest again was what she was now wearing.

Phantom coughed, the sound slightly scratching as it traveled through the speakers. _"Uh, hi, Kitty. What…are you wearing?"_

_"You like?"_ Kitty put on a dazzling smile as she grabbed her red and black dress, spun around in a circle. The bottom of the dress, designed with black flames, fanned out, making the flames dance. _"Dora's tailor is amazing! She ran out of purple, unfortunately, but I can't complain that much__I suppose, seeing how this one turned out."_ She stopped spinning, allowing the silky dress to cover the top half of her black high heel boots. She brushed her layered green hair out of her face and smirked at the camera. _"Do you approve, Danny?"_ she asked flirtatiously.

_"Uh, I, um…what?" _Phantom rambled, apparently lost.

"That's one hot chick," Dash said dreamily.

"Don't get too hooked, Dash," Kwan advised, patting his friend on the shoulder. "She's taken."

"What?"

_"Hey!"_ a man's voice yelled. _"Don't even think about it, Phantom!" _A blond, dead teenager came up from off screen and put his arm around Kitty's shoulders. _"Kitty's _my_ girl."_

Phantom laughed, a little uneasily. _"Don't worry about me, Johnny, I'm not interested. But good job sticking your foot in your mouth."_

_"What?"_ The dead blond looked down at Kitty and saw her glaring up at him. He took his arm off her shoulders and raised his hands before him defensively. _"Hey, Kitten, what's with the evil eyes? What did I do?"_

Kitty huffed and turned her head away. _"I'm not a trophy, Johnny, and until you get it through your big head that I don't _belong_ to you, you can stay on the other side of the wedding because that's as close as you'll be getting to me." _With that announcement, the girl marched off, her black boots clacking loudly against the stone as she made her way to the entrance of the castle.

_"What? Kitty! Wait!" _Johnny ran after her, raising his arm and calling for her to come back. _"I didn't mean it like _that_!"_

Phantom laughed and pointed the camera at the ghosts behind him. _"Man, they fight a lot, don't they?"_

_"Just wait until you get a girlfriend, Whelp," _the robotic ghost advised in a serious voice. _"Then you won't be so surprised."_

_"What's that supposed to mean?" _Ember demanded, glaring at him.

Phantom sighed. _"Seriously? You guys too? This is a _wedding_. Stop arguing, will you?"_

Ember turned her glare on him. _"You're not the boss of us, Dipstick. If we want to argue, we're going to argue."_

Dash glared at her. How dare she be so disrespectful to his hero! Even if she was hot, she shouldn't be treating Phantom like he's beneath her or something, because he so wasn't.

_"Well, then, get a room," _Phantom said, apparently unaffected by her attitude. _"…But before you do, do you mind releasing Lance and me—I mean, Lance and I?" _the chain rattled again and Dash realized he was hooked to something.

The star jock turned to Kwan with a raised eyebrow. "Lance?"

"Lance Thunder, that weird weatherman guy," Kwan explained quietly. "He's the one who's supposed to be recording all this and he's also the one Phantom's cuffed to."

"Cuffed?'

"Just watch. I think they're going to unhook them."

Dash turned back to the TV and saw the robot smirking and talking. _"…hurting your wrists?"_ he was asking.

Phantom snorted. _"As if. They're just a little annoying and unnecessary now, seeing as how we're here finally." _the camera turned a little more and Dash was surprised to see Lance Thunder, the weatherman, appear on the screen in an extreme close up. He knew Lance was there, but he'd never seen the guy look so pale. Was he sick? _"You want them off too, don't you Mr. Thunder?"_

_"I, uh, yes," _Lance agreed shakily, his eyes darting back uneasily towards the ghosts.

The camera followed his gaze and Phantom said, _"See? Now, do you mind?"_

_"How do we know you won't try to escape, Punk?" _the jailor asked, his eyes narrowing suspiciously. _"That human slows you down. If we disconnect you two, how do I know for sure you won't try to make a break for it?"_

_"Oh please." _Dash could just see his hero rolling his eyes in a sarcastic way, as if what the creep was saying was utterly ridiculous. _"I risk my…afterlife and give up my free time to protect Amity Park. Do you really think I'd leave the poor guy here? Besides, you all got me here. It's only fair that I stay."_

The white ghost still seemed unconvinced, but the some of the other ghosts nodded slightly.

The ghost with a tiara and long blonde hair laid her hand lightly on the white ghost's arm. _"Sir Phantom is very honorable, Sir Walker," _she said in a quiet, but sure voice. _"If he says he will remain, then he'll stay." _

Walker spared her a glance before he looked back at Phantom with narrow eyes. _"If you leave, Punk, you won't like the consequences."_

_"Oh, I'm sure I won't,"_ Phantom said, and Dash got the feeling he was rolling his eyes again. The jock smirked and he was sure his peers were doing so too. It was great seeing Phantom, their hero, making fun of authority.

_"Whatever,"_ The robot ghost—'_Didn't his name start with an S?'—_said as he stepped forward. He pulled out a device with blue electricity sparking at the top. He stopped before Danny, gave him a wary look, and then lowered the device. A second later, the humans heard a pop and the sound of metal cuffs dropping to the ground.

Phantom let out a cheer and the camera was set down on the ground where the teens caught a wonderful view of everyone's feet. The ghost hero let out a sigh of satisfaction. _"Ah, much better."_

The camera was hurriedly snatched off the ground, being raised a few inches higher than it had been before. It turned and Dash grinned as he finally caught sight of his hero.

Danny Phantom, snow white hair messed and covered in tree bark, stood against the desolate black and green background of what could only be the Ghost Zone. His white glow made him stand out against the blackness and Dash felt himself awed by how…majestic his hero looked as he rubbed his right wrist. Phantom tilted his head slightly to the side and gave a small smile towards the camera. Dash heard the girls swoon in the room and saw the cheerleader sitting beside the speakers place a hand against her cheek as she sighed.

_"I would have picked the camera back up, Mr. Thunder," _he said while looking in the direction of the camera. _"I was just rubbing my wrist a little." '__Lance has the camera now?'_

_"No, no," _Lance said hurriedly. _"This is my job, after all, Mr. Phantom. You have other things to worry about, I'm sure."_

Phantom shrugged easily. _"Not really, but suit yourself. It was fun while it laste—"_

Phantom yelped and the teens in the room made similar exclamations of surprise as their hero was sent tumbling off-screen. They all leaned forward apprehensively as Lance quickly pointed the camera at Phantom. It took a while for the teens to understand what they were seeing, but they were helped along by Phantom's delighted laughter. The girls "aww"ed and the guys smiled. Phantom was being licked by a little green puppy. Dash grinned as he realized Danny Phantom also had a small dog. '_Pookie will be so excited!'_

Phantom laughed and tried to push the puppy off of him a little. _"Heel, Cujo! Heel! Stop that! It tickles!"_

The puppy, Cujo, barked happily and allowed Phantom to sit up on his elbows. The puppy wagged his tail and closed his eyes in bliss as Phantom affectionately rubbed his head, messing up the glowing green fur.

_"Mr. Phantom?" _Lance called uneasily. _"Is this…your dog?"_

Phantom looked up at Lance out of the corner of his eye. _"Call me Danny, and no. Cujo's actually a stray dog. He just took a liking to me, I guess."_

A snort came from off screen. _"Mangy mutt," _the robot's voice grumbled.

Cujo's eyes snapped open and he turned to the ghosts. He bared his teeth and growled at the ghosts. It looked kind of cute…until the little puppy suddenly became a giant, ferocious dog. Dash barely held a scream in check as the other teens gasped and shrieked. The dog stepped protectively over Phantom as he continued to growl at the ghosts. Some of the ghosts stepped back uneasily while others frowned at the dog.

_"Cujo!"_ Phantom shouted, scrambling out from underneath the dog. _"Bad boy! Heel! Sit!"_

Cujo gave Phantom an indecisive look, apparently unsure. Phantom reached out a finger to tickle the dog underneath his chin. Cujo's mouth dropped open and his tongue rolled out as he leaned into Phantom's touch. He sat down and a second later, he returned to looking like a puppy. He placed his front paws on Phantom's legs and barked.

The ghost teen chuckled and picked him up, holding him cradle style. He scratched Cujo's belly and the puppy wagged his tail happily. _"You're a psycho doggie, you know that? Yes you are! Yes you are!"_ Phantom cooed at the ghost pup in baby talk.

The picture shook as Lance trembled. _"M-Mr. Phh-Phantom?"_

_"Danny,"_ Phantom corrected absently. He looked up from pampering the puppy, the loving smile still on his face, though the human girls were still too traumatized to care at the moment. _"Yeah?"_

_"Wha-What was th-that about?"_

_"Hmm? Oh!" _Phantom let out an apologetic laugh and rubbed the back of his neck, cradling Cujo in one arm. _"Sorry about that. Cujo tends to do that when he gets angry or when he's threatened. He's really a nice dog…usually…most of the time."_

_"Uh, right…"_ the picture slowly stopped shaking as badly.

Cujo nipped at Phantom's fingers and wiggled in his grip. The ghost teen set him down and squatted at his level. _"Something the matter, boy?"_

Cujo barked and ran forward a few steps toward a large rock before running back. He barked again and repeated the process until Phantom, with his head cocked questioningly to the side, began to follow him. Cujo barked one more time before he ran behind the boulder.

_"Yo, Dipstick!"_ Ember called in annoyance. _"Play with your mutt later. We have to go!"_

_"Just give me a second, Ember," _Phantom shouted back, looking over his shoulder. _"It won't take long, I pr—" _For the second time in five minutes, Phantom was tackled to the ground by a canine and the humans gasped, afraid for their hero, only to see him once again being licked, this time only once, but it was a _looong_ lick.

Phantom squawked and pushed against the large furry, black chest. _"Wha?" _He blinked up at a black wolf-like face.

_"Omiko, Friend!" _the werewolf-looking ghost said with its own version of a smile, its mouth hanging open and its tongue lolling out.

Phantom's face lit up in a grin_. "Wulf!"_ he reached his arms up and wrapped them around the werewolf's neck, engulfing the canine in a hug.

Wulf returned the hug before the two separated and he helped the teen back to his feet. Phantom continued to smile at him as he wiped the drool off his face with his sleeve. _"What are you doing here?" _he glanced over at the sheriff ghost, his eyes narrowing slightly. _"Isn't it dangerous?"_

The sheriff glared loathingly at Wulf as the werewolf shifted uncomfortably. _"Kias domaral newvaro,"_ Wulf began. _"Eeki namona."_

"Huh?" Dash and his peers said, not understanding any of that.

A nerd cleared his throat in the back and said, "If I may, the Wulf said that he is safe from the white man as long as the wedding is in session. He is required to be there as well and so had to take the risk of getting caught before he can make his escape." they all gaped at him until he shifted uncomfortably. "It's Esperanto. A language developed by L. L. Zamenhof that he hoped would become a neutral language that all countries could share and—"(1)

"Yeah, yeah, shut up, geek," Dash growled. "We don't want a history lesson."

The nerd was about to correct Dash that he wasn't a geek when a football was suddenly thrown at him. He fell down, but no one cared since it shut him up.

They all turned back to the screen and were dismayed to see that the ghosts had already changed topic and were now talking about some tailor ghost. They groaned unhappily at missing out, but they weren't too upset, seeing as how it was being recorded and they would all eventually have copies they could watch over and over again.

_"You should have told me before that I would have to dress up," _Phantom was complaining. Wulf stood over his shoulder while Cujo sat comfortably at his feet. _"I have a tux I could have worn."_

_"There was no time," _a sexy genie-like ghost said as she inspected her nails.

_"And besides, your tux probably wouldn't have been a very good one," _Ember added. _"Just suck it up, dipstick. You're getting fitted for a new suit whether you like it or not." _She reached out and pulled a piece of bark out of his white hair. She grimaced at it and tossed it away. _"And a shower."_

Phantom scowled and crossed his arms. _"I don't need a shower, and there's nothing wrong with what I'm wearing now. Why bother?"_

Ember and the genie shared a glance and rolled their eyes. Dora giggled. _"Sir Phantom, you are most definitely not presentable right now."_

Phantom frowned and looked down at himself. His DP suit was slightly torn, some dog slobber had found its way all over the thing, and his left glove's index finger was missing, but it wasn't that bad. His hair was very messy, covered in bark, and there was still some drool at the tip. Dash had to admit, although his hero still looked like the awesome guy he was, he didn't look his best.

Phantom raised an eyebrow at the girls. _"Alright, I admit I don't look that great, but I don't need an extreme makeover. I just need to wash my face, clear out the bark, and concentrate on fixing my suit. There's no need to be fitted for a new tux or for me to take a shower."_

_"Oh, you're going to get a new tux _and_ take a shower, dipstick," _Ember assured, crossing her arms and giving Phantom a slightly superior look.

_"Oh yeah?"_ Phantom asked. _"And what makes you say that?"_

Ember jerked her head towards the camera. _"That,"_ she said simply.

Phantom frowned for a moment before his eyes widened. "_Low. That's _so_ low."_

Ember and Desiree smirked and shrugged. _"We're ghosts,"_ they reminded him.

Phantom sighed and his shoulders sagged. _"Fine. Lead the way."_

Dash frowned and looked at Kwan. All that talk about tuxedos and looking good reminded him of something. "Hey. Where's Paulina? Wasn't she supposed to be here?" '_I can't believe she's missing out on her chance to see her 'soul __mate' on television.'_

Kwan pointed upstairs, but didn't take his eyes off the screen. "She's upstairs with Star. She's been bawling her eyes out ever since she learned Phantom has a crush on some chick."

"He does?!" Dash exclaimed.

"Shh!" the crowd of teenagers shushed.

Dash glared at them_. 'This is supposed to be my birthday party! If I want to yell in the middle of the show, I will! I missed over half of it anyway because no one bothered to call and tell me Phantom was being filmed live. If they think they're getting any copies of this after how they've treated me today, they're even dumber than I thought!'_

He didn't speak his thoughts, though. He didn't want to miss any more of his hero than he already had.

* * *

**Eh, the ending's not great, but it'll do. :)**

**(1) Did you know Esperanto is actually a real language? That's actually kind of cool. I couldn't be bothered to look up the translation, though, so that's all pretty much gibberish up there.**

**Okay, a couple things. One, I suck at fashion. If you have an idea for an outift one of the characters can wear and don't mind sharing, I'd appreciate the help :) Two, I meant for this chapter to go a bit longer where the whole funny part was supposed to come in, but the chapter got out of hand. It's still funny though, right?**

**Also, my document manager...thing isn't working right. I am currently cheating the system! And I'm proud of myself! It's simple, but ingenious! ;D It won't let me upload my file, so I'm using the old document from chapter four to get this up here. I don't know how that'll effect ch. 4, but I don't think it'll impact it too badly. **

**Oh! And I put up a poll on my profile about whether or not Danny should sing. I'm kind of on the fence for this, so I need your guys' help. I'm not sure whether I like the idea or not. **

**Next chapter: Paulina's POV. Bet that'll be fun ;D**

**Thanks for reading! Leave a review if it so pleases you ;)**


	6. Pariah's Castle

**Whew! Finished! Sorry that took a while to finish; Paulina's POV was surprisingly hard to write...**

**That was really cool! I posted it, went to bed, and woke up later to find I had nine reviews already! So flippin' **_**awesome**_**! Thanks so much! Unfortunetly, I can't reply to you all right now. I'm sorry, but I don't have the time. All I can do right now is post this, because I have to babysit in a few. I promise to reply as soon as I get back (or tomorrow, since the little rascals will probably wear me out by the time I get back). I figure, though, that you would all like this chapter to be posted as soon as I could get it up and wait for replies than to have to wait for both. **

**So yeah, replies to reviews will come later. In the mean time: enjoy the newest chapter in GZE!**

**Edit: It's later! ... *Hides behind couch* Sorry, sorry, sorry, sorry, sorr-ehem. You get the idea. However, I've finished chapter 7. It's in the editing process and it shoud be posted very soon.**

***Still hiding behind couch* To the reviewers of chapter 5!  
****xxBakaAkki: **lol, I didn't realize it until my word processor corrected the spelling. I searched and I my jaw actually dropped :P Unfortunatey, no, but I guess you know that now, huh? *sweatdrops* Well, chapter seven has something to swoon over ;) I'm thinking the same thing. I even have a song in mind.  
**Bubblely-Chan: **Dang it. I'm actually considering it! Ah well, the best plans are the ones that change...or something like that ;D lol Cool, thanks.  
**stick fight3: **Lol, Thanks! Yeah, poor Dash. Losing to an inanimate object ;D I love those canines...*Hmms secretly*  
**DP-shrine-in-closet-girl: **If you did, I love hearing it again :D I came up with the idea when I was supposed to be sleeping XP I wasn't sure how well I did Dash, but I'm glad I did good! I'm having a lot of fun with the audience, but I've been focusing a little too much on them and it's been slowing the plot down. You knew about the language? You've been holding out on me! Shame, shame, shame, lol, just joking. Yeah, I think those are my favorite moments to write ;D Trust me, Shrine, I have big plans, _big plans_!  
**Kiomori: **Dash can be a lot of fun. I kind of feel bad for what I did, too, but lol. It definetly helps me out...hey, how'd you know? Er, I mean...Yeah, Amity Park ishaving one busy day! :D  
**E350: **Thanks! He's not one of my favorites-although I still like him-so I'm glad I have him down :D  
**Trinity Fenton-Phantom: **Getting interesting? Psh. It was alway interesting ;D jk. lol, that'd kill him! ...Again! I haven't decided what to do with Pariah. I'm sure he'll stay in the sarcophagus, though. I'll probably have him wake up though...  
**Little Juniper: **lol, probably not, but I haven't gotten that far, so we'll see. The link didn't show up...but thanks for your help anyway :D thanks!  
**hawkflyer667: **Yeah, irony. You got to love when it's on your side ;) lol, I'll keep the suggestion in mind. I love rock (hate rap and most hip hop songs anyway) so if he does sing, that will most likely be the genre. I don't know, I like the DP sign idea...  
**Imawesome: **Thanks! The humors a little spoiled for me since I already know what's going to happen, so I always get a big, silly grin when I hear about people's reaction. It really made you fall out of the chair though? :D  
**deadlydaisy808: **Thanks! (Love the avatar btw)  
**PinkPanther123: ***Bows* Thank you. Dash was easy in comparison to Paulina. *Groans* Thanks again!  
**inuyashaxkagome321: **Thanks! Updating!  
**Echoheart: **I'm leaning that way. I don't want this to be another story where his secret gets revealed. It would be redundant since it would be at the end. lol, I'm planning on it, actually. lol, a lot of people agree, but no one has suggested Ember yet. Huh.  
**peppymint: **Paulina will get another 'poor Paulina' after this chapter is over *snickers too*  
**Donteatcowman: **Yeah, you catch a lot of things and have a way of looking at them. It's very helpful, especially when I have writer's block. Yeah, I feel a little bad for him. I don't like bashing characters, so I'm glad he _is _a fan, otherwise that'd just be real harsh. I wasn't sure how I was going to get the viewer's perspective at first, but I like how it turned out. It slows the plot down a bit, though, so I'll have to focus a little less on their POVs. Nah, I like using the cast's perspectives. They're already connected to the world, so it's all the more satisfyig. Glad you do! I was smiling like an idiot when I wrote that (I remember because my brother took a picture). I love it when that happens to translations! Green tie, huh? I'll keep that in mind. I can only imagine Skulker in a uniform if anything...Thanks! And thank you for the review :D  
**Thunderstorm101: **Like icying on the cake, huh XD That happened to me once. I was in heaven...no really, I was dreaming by that point...  
**acosta perez jose ramiro: **The POVs are a lot of fun. I can't wait for the others to come...Thanks. I will (but beware the long hiates that randomly occur).  
**Lexie: **I had a laughing fit after I read tha XD Thanks! Sorry to disappoint, good thing you have this chapter to read now, right? ;D  
**TweenisodeOrange: **Yes, gettin into Paulina's head was very scary. And difficult! Man that girl kills. lol. Thanks for the help! I cleared it up. I hate redundany and then I go and do it myself.  
**Spectral Ninja: **I know! I even searched, but this is the only time. Strange. He has a lot of potential, too...Why thank you! I aim to please. Dash is a football player. He'll bounce back ;D  
**PhantomMouse1115: **Really? Thanks! My writing style isn't the best, but I'm glad you like it anyway :D Yay, fav!  
**Nimrod the Writer: **Yeah, it'll be _awesome_. Or at least, I'm hoping it will be. I've never done Vlad before, but I'm excited! He'll play a key role later on. I'm glad I have Danny's characte down, but the real test will come later, I think. I'll have to revisit Dash later, too. He was a lot of fun to write. Thanks for the review!  
**anon:** lol, thanks!  
**Lokoforsonic9559: **Thanks. I'll never stop writing this fic until it is finished! Though it will sometimes tak me a few months to update...The tree and the speeder. yeah, I miss them already...no really, they were my favorite scenes to write ;D  
**ToiletFacility: **Thanks so much! I'm having a lot of fun with the different angles, but I have to focus a bit more on the plot. It seems to have slowed down...:D they are in character? It doesn't feel so much like they are to me when I write them. Nah, interesting is one of my favorite words XD Thanks for the review again!  
**JapaneseAnimeFreak16: **Thank you so much! Really, your kind words were really appreciated. I even reread your review to help me get rid of writer's block :D *Chuckles* YEAH he is. lol. Thank you again, so much :D  
**Ella: **Yup. ;)  
**MetaliHead2x4: **It's maybe a day away. Chapter 7 is finished.  
**Thanks again guys! And I'm sorry about not replying when I said I would...**

**I don't own DP. Send a thanks to dragondancer123 for all her help too! **

Chapter 6  
Pariah's Castle

Paulina let out another loud, unattractive sob and then buried her face deeper in the pillow she had cradled against her chest. To get the sense of how crushed she was, she was hugging _Dash's_ pillow…and it was disgusting.

"Come on, Paulina," Starr complained, exasperation in her voice. "We're missing out on what's happening!" Laughter came up from downstairs and Starr looked out the door wistfully.

"I don't care!" Paulina shouted, her grief-filled voice muffled by the pillow. "I don't want to watch anymore!"

"Paulina, you're being silly." Starr stamped her small foot in emphasis, but it didn't seem to capture Paulina's attention.

"You don't understand!"

"Then why don't you tell me?" Starr demanded, sounding more exasperated than concerned.

_Because you'll blab it to the whole school and then say it was an accident, just like you did last week,_Paulina thought venomously. "Just go watch it by yourself, Starr!" she yelled instead.

"You know I wouldn't do that." Despite the supportive words, Starr's voice was dull. She sighed and began inspecting her nails with bored disinterest.

Paulina was about to snap at her again, when a picture of Danny Phantom popped into her mind, but not in a way she appreciated. He was holding some mystery girl in his arms as he looked down at her, blushing adorably as he smiled at the girl. Paulina began crying with renewed vigor.

Starr winced and looked up from her nails. _She…really isn't taking this well, is she? _Slowly, and with great hesitation, the blonde gingerly sat on the edge of dirty bed. She paused before she placed a hand against the distressed girl's back and began rubbing it in smooth, comforting circles. "Hey," she began tentatively, "it'll be alright, Paulina…"

Paulina snorted unattractively. "H-how? The ghost b-boy's in love with some other g-g-girl who makes him b-blush and st-stammer so c-c-cutely a-and—," She began hiccupping between loud sobs.

Starr flinched and her expression became distressed when she realized her friend would need some serious cheering...and despite Starr being co-captain of the cheer squad, she knew next to nothing about how to cheer up her usually self-assured friend.

"She's pr-probably g-gorgeous t-too," Paulina continued to stammer pitifully. "Prettier than m-m-me!"

Starr frowned and shifted uncomfortably. _What am I supposed to do when my friend has a breakdown? Why can't those chick flicks ever have useful information? Can't they make a movie about a dead boy? If only there was a movie out there that told you what to do when your friend's dead crush falls for another living girl!_

Starr sighed and looked around the room thoughtfully. Her eyes landed on a _Dead Love _poster on Dash's wall. It was a fairly old romance movie that Starr and Paulina had once watched out of pure boredom. It was pretty cheesy, but not a bad romance all around. _But why does Dash have a _romance_ poster about ghosts falling in love_—_Oh! Duh!_

Starr stood up and placed her fisted hands on her hips. Paulina sniffled and looked up from the pillow in surprise. Her mascara ran freely from the tears sliding down her face, and because she had had her face pressed against the pillow, the messy makeup had all smeared together. Starr dutifully ignored her friend's ghastly appearance and gave her a stern look, causing the Latina girl to blink dazedly.

"That's enough, Paulina," Starr said. It was hard to make her shrill voice sound firm and serious, which was necessary if she was to imitate the movie. She tried to deepen her voice. "How dare you do this to yourself!"

"What?" Paulina asked quietly, too shattered to attempt to speak louder or pay attention to Starr's vocal issues.

"You're a mess! How are you supposed to win Phantom back like this?"

"What?" Paulina repeated more alertly, and with the beginnings of hope shining in her eyes.

"You're the most beautiful girl in the whole school, Paulina! You could have any boy you wanted!"

The hope dimmed a bit in the Latina girl's eyes. "Except the Ghost Boy..."

Starr made a rude noise and tossed her hair over her shoulder. "So he has someone he likes already. Big deal. You could _still_ get him. Remember Tony Shortz? He had a girlfriend too, but you had him following you like a lost puppy just by winking at him! Surely you can steal the ghost boy away from some trampy girl he still thinks of as a _friend_."

"But you saw how he acted, Starr," Paulina protested. "He clearly has d-deep fe-fee-ee-"

"Feelings for her? Maybe. But he denies it," Starr pointed out.

"I kn-know and it's c-cute how he's so n-naive about his f-fe—" Paulina stammered until she buried her face in the pillow again with another loud cry.

"Look." Starr sat back on the bed and snatched the dirty pillow out of Paulina's grip. She sneered at the disgusting thing before she tossed it across the room where it landed next to the closet. Paulina whined in protest, but quieted when Starr pointed a perfectly manicured finger in her face. "You want the Ghost Boy, don't you?"

Paulina blinked up at her dazedly, clearly confused by Starr's behavior. "Well, yeah..."

"Yeah? That's a weak yeah! Let me ask you again: do you want the Ghost Boy?"

"Yes," Paulina said with an eyebrow raised questioningly.

Starr put her hands on her hips and leaned towards Paulina dramatically. "You've got to do better than that if you want to win your Ghost Boy back! Is the Ghost Boy your dream boy, Paulina?"

"Yes!"

"Are you his biggest phan?"

"Yes!"

"Were you his _first_ phan?"

"Yes!"

"Do you _deserve_ his love?"

"Yes!"

"Do you want to share him with some tramp that doesn't deserve his love?"

"No!"

"Do you think this mystery girl is _better_ than you?"

"NO!"

"And do you, Paulina Sanchez, believe yourself to be the Ghost Boy's _soul mate_?"

Paulina's eyes brightened. "YES!"

"Then are you going to let this nobody steal your soul mate's heart, or are you going to fight her for it?"

"FIGH—but I might break a nail..."

"Not that kind of fight," Star said with an appalled grimace. "That's messy and barbaric... SO WILL YOU FIGHT FOR YOUR LOVE?"

"YES!"

"WILL YOU COME OUT THE WINNER?"

"OF COURSE! No one can beat the power of our love!"

"That's the spirit! Now let's go get yours!"

An awkward silence overcame the girls as they stared at each other, unsure of what to do after you were pumped up. Below them, their peers laughed at what was happening on the hottest special of the year.

_That's where the scene ended in Dead Love..._ Starr thought miserably. _Darn it, now what?_

"How am I supposed to fight for him, Starr?" Paulina asked mournfully. She hugged her legs against her chest since Starr had taken the pillow away. She rested her chin on her knees, a pout on her face that probably would have made the boys start howling. "He seems to really like her."

"We don't know that," Starr dismissed with a flippant wave of her hand.

"The bad ghosts seem to think so."

"So? They're the ghosts the ghost boy beats all the time. Why should we listen to what _they_ say when _Phantom_ says that he and his 'friend' are _only_ friends?"

Paulina's eyes began to burn with a new fire. "That's true. They think those two like each other because they've known each other for so long. Like what we do with Danny and Manson."

Starr grimaced. "Yeah, but let's not compare them to those losers."

"Right." Paulina tapped a manicured nail against her chin thoughtfully. "So how can I prove to Phantom I'm a better choice for him than some girl that he's known most of his life?"

Starr was about to comment that he was a ghost and may not have actually known the girl in his life, but let it drop. Paulina seemed to be pulling herself back together; no use distracting her with technicalities. "She probably knows more about the ghost boy than you," Starr said instead. "Like how he died and what his favorite color is. Maybe you should find out more about him…"

Paulina rolled her eyes and flipped her hair over her shoulder. "Boys don't care about that stuff, Starr."

"This isn't just _any_ boy, though," Star pointed out, all too used to her friend's patronizing ways to take offense. "This is the Ghost Boy. _Danny Phantom_. The hero of Amity Park!"

"Yeah," Paulina said dismissively, "I know that. He's a lot more sensitive than other guys, but he's still a teenage boy, right?"

Starr pouted.

"Right, so what I need to do is find out more about this _girl_ so I can crush her…"

Starr was still upset about her idea being rejected, but she wasn't about to give up yet. It was her only way to get downstairs and back to watching the show. So instead, she twirled her blonde hair with a finger and said thoughtfully, "Yeah, you could go that way. But while you try to find out more about the mystery girl, the other girls will be learning _all about_ the Ghost Boy. I bet they'll learn more than you even."

Paulina straightened and her eyes widened. "What?"

Starr smothered a smirk. _Yes! Gotcha! _"I'm just saying. We're missing out on a lot, you know. I saw Ashley taking notes when we ran up here. I wouldn't be surprised if she already knows how the ghost boy died and what his favorite color is. The mystery girl may have even been brought up again. It's a shame we're up here instead of down there," Starr continued to say, falsely mournful. She sighed and rested her hand against her cheek. "Now Ashley will probably get the Ghost Boy instead of you…"

"As if!" Paulina shouted and stood up hastily. Her legs weren't ready for such a fast action after sitting for so long and she wobbled a little, almost falling back on the bed. Starr quickly caught her flailing arms and steadied her. Paulina giggled deceptively to cover up her awkwardness. "Uh, whoops." She looked back at the bed she had been sitting on and gagged, placing a hand over her mouth, a horrified expression on her face. "I can't believe I sat on _that_! Why'd you let me sit on Dash's _bed_, Starr? Eww!"

Paulina wrenched her arm out of Starr's grip and began stomping out the door, her head held high and her shoulders thrown back confidently. She stopped at the doorway and looked over her shoulder with a scowl. "What are you waiting for, Starr? We have to go protect my Ghost Boy from all those worthless bakas!"

Starr grinned triumphantly. _She's back! Yes! I am _such_ a good friend! Now we can finish the show and—Oh shoot…_

"Wait, Paulina! Your make-up!"

Lance nervously watched the ghosts enter the King of all Ghostkind's Keep, his instincts yelling at him to turn around and run back to the Fenton's vehicle and high tail it right out of the spooky ghost world. _I'm a weatherman, for Pete's sake! What am I doing here? Inside that castle areall kinds of ghosts waiting for us. Some of those ghosts hate humans and will probably try to offer me up to the wedded pair as a—Ah, no! Don't think about it, Lance!_

Danny Phantom paused in the entryway, looking about as uneasy as Lance felt. The ghostly hero licked his lips and rubbed his neck as he shifted from foot to foot.

"Hey, dipstick," Ember called from inside the castle. "What's the hold up?"

Danny grimaced. He looked over his shoulder at Lance, who was still frozen in place, and called back, "Just give me a minute, Ember. I've…got to take care of something."

Ember's sigh echoed out the doors. "Fine. But make it quick. And no funny business!"

Danny scoffed and turned around, walking back down the stairs. "Funny business?" he muttered to himself. "This whole wedding is a joke."

Lance shifted uncomfortably as Danny approached him. "Is there a p-problem, Mr. Phantom?"

Danny stopped a few feet from him and rubbed his neck. "Well, to be honest, I don't really want to go in there, Mr. Thunder. It's full of my enemies, after all. Not to mention they're going to march me off to my doom…But I'm guessing you have more of an issue going in there than I do?"

Lance gulped. "You can smell my fear right now?" he asked him in a shaky whisper.

For some reason, Danny began to laugh, as if Lance's question was funny. "Oh," he gasped, "no, Mr. Thunder. I can't. You look scared, though. Your body's shaking, you're as pale as a ghost—which is kind of ironic, considering, and if I didn't know any better, I'd swear you thought you were about to be eaten."

Lance just stared at him.

"Oh." Danny shifted on his feet again. His hand reached up to rub his neck once more in what Lance was starting to see as a nervous habit. "Well, you know, Mr. Thunder, they aren't going to hurt you because of the—"

"The truce?" Lance interrupted him harshly, surprising the hero into dropping his arm. "Yeah, I've heard you say so before." Danny looked up at him with a confused frown, but something had occurred to Lance, and he wasn't going to take one step further towards the hellhole until he received his answers. "But may I ask you, Mr. Phantom, what exactly does that mean for me? I, as you can plainly see, am not a ghost. I am a _human_. Does the truce extend to humans?"

"…No."

"It's only for ghosts?"

"…I think so, yeah."

"Then how is this truce supposed to keep the ghosts inside that castle from serving me as the main course for their special wedding?"

Danny lowered his head a little so that his bangs covered his eyes. "…It's not."

Lance tensed and his body started shaking like he was in the middle of a hurricane—and he would know. "Oh. I s-see." He was ready to break down right then and there, in front of Amity Park itself and the hero that protected it. _Why did I even ask?_

Danny raised his head again. He looked Lance straight in the eyes, and like the eye contact had done back in the Specter Speeder, Lance felt himself calming down and listening to the firm voice without question. "No, the truce doesn't protect you, Mr. Thunder, but _I_ do. The ghosts are aware that I protect Amity Park and all its citizens, and in some weird ways, they recognize that I won't tolerate them hurting you. Truce or no truce, they know that if they threaten you, they'll have _me_ to deal with, and trust me, I can pack a punch." He smiled a half smile and shrugged. "If they threaten you, I'll attack them. Both the ghost and I will be in direct violation of the truce and Walker will take action."

"You'll risk getting thrown in ghost jail to help me?" Lance asked in awe.

Danny blushed and laughed in embarrassment. "Ah, geez, don't say it like that. It's not a big deal really. I owe Walker a thousand years in jail—well, actually, I think it's more than that now. But until he figures out how to detain me, I have got a get out of jail free card!" He hooked his hands behind his head and smiled goofily at Lance. "So you see: nothing to worry about! Just stay close to me and I promise I'll keep the ghosts from doing unthinkable things to you."

Lance did actually feel better after Danny's reassurance. He still didn't feel relaxed or chipper about going inside a place filled to the brim with ghosts, but he didn't feel doomed either. He returned a smaller smile to Danny, which made the teen grin wider. "Uh, thank you, Mr. Phantom."

"No problem, Mr. Thunder, but I'd appreciate it if you'd start calling me _Danny_."

"I'll try, Mr. Phantom."

"_Great job, Lance! That was amazing! I got chills! How'd you ever think of bringing out Phantom's hero side like that?"_

_Leave me alone, woman,_ Lance thought miserably. He was about to open his mouth to ask Danny something, when loud barking came from inside the castle.

"AHH!" Ember yelled from inside. "Phantom! Get your butt back in here and control your stupid mutt!"

Loud growling that steadily deepened reached Lance's and Danny's ears.

"PHANTOM!" all the ghosts shouted.

Danny laughed. "Ah, I love that dog." He turned around and walked calmly up the steps once more. "Cujo," he called lazily, smiling widely. "Here boy. Don't eat those ghosts or they'll give you indigestion. Cu-jo, here boy."

Lance looked one last time at the Specter Speeder before he raced after Danny.

Where Danny walked in without hesitation, Lance paused on the threshold of the ancient building. Inside, there were no lights; it was pitch black in the castle hallway. He could see Danny glowing against the darkness; the Ghost Boy was chuckling softly as he calmed his large dog down. Skulker and Walker were glaring at Cujo while the other ghosts were plastered against a wall. Wulf stood off to the side, looking confused—or as confused as a fuzzy-faced wolf man can look.

Cujo finally reverted to his puppy form and barked up at Danny, wagging his tail. Danny chuckled one last time and bent down to pick the puppy up. He looked over at Lance and raised an arm, beckoning him over.

Lance sighed and walked into the ghost's domain. The ghosts spared him looks ranging from hostile (Walker), annoyed (Skulker), to sympathetic (Dora). Lance smiled timidly at them, but they had already turned away.

"Are we going to have a problem keeping that dog under control?" Walker asked Danny, who was currently being licked in the face by an excited ghost puppy.

Danny pulled his face away from Cujo and rolled his eyes at the warden. "Loosen up, Walker. It's not like he can trash the place singlehandedly…I think."

"You best hope not, Dipstick," Ember stated threateningly.

Danny shrugged. "Eh. Whatever. Let's just get going before we—"

Before he could finish his sentence, the giant iron doors suddenly began to shut, creaking on hinges that hadn't been oiled in who-knows how long. Lance and Danny spun around and watched the doors steadily began to close them in darkness, the small amount of light the Ghost Zone had been providing dissipating. Danny stepped forward, a hand reaching out towards the doors as if he wanted to stop them. The doors ignored him and closed by themselves, a loud boom ringing in their ears with finality.

Lance screamed.

Danny grimaced.

The ghosts laughed.

Paulina fixed her hair one last time. When she was sure it was back up to standard, she squared her shoulders, plastered on a too-good-for-you smile, and walked primly down the stairs. Her shoes made little _clip-clop_ noises as they hit the hardwood, alerting the party-goers below to her presence. Despite them being aware of her coming, only a few boys looked up at her entrance. Paulina wasn't too bothered by their lack of attention, though she wasn't exactly thrilled either. The boys who looked up smiled sweetly at her, hoping to catch her eye and be a rebound guy or some other stupid thing like that.

Paulina turned her nose up at them. There was only one guy good enough for her, and he wasn't in the room at the moment. He currently had a love interest, but like Starr had said, she could easily steal him back. She just had to research and make sure no other girl was making their own moves on him. Her little lapse in self-confidence had left the field wide open for all kinds of unworthy nobodies, and her Ghost Boy deserved better than them.

Paulina spotted Ashley standing behind the couch and glared. The _ex_-popular girl had a pad of paper she was writing in, just like Starr had said. Judging by the wide, excited grin on her face, she had, apparently, found out a lot about the Ghost Boy. Paulina glanced around the room and realized Ashley wasn't the only one taking notes. Almost everybody was. They knew more about the Ghost Boy than she did! _No! How could I have let this happen?_

She was about to say something she was sure would garner some attention, but a wonderful voice reached her ears before she could.

"_Was that really necessary?"_

Paulina barely restrained a squeal at the sound of her Ghost Boy's voice. She lost interest in the people around her and zeroed in on the television…only to be disappointed. The screen was blank.

"Hey," she complained. "What happened?"

"Shh," the crowed whispered. They were all leaning towards the TV, their eyes staring into the blank nothingness intently.

"_Must you blame us for everything, Dipstick?" _Ember's voice demanded angrily._ "We don't have any control over what this creepy place does!"_

"_I know that, Ember," _Danny Phantom's voice said, sounding as annoyed as she was. _"It was a rhetorical question."_

"_Retorcal?" _Youngblood asked. _"What does that even mean?" _

Paulina blushed and looked nervously around her. Youngblood was only visible to people who were kids or who thought they weren't adults. It would be very bad for her image if people found out she could see the kid-like ghost. Although, if Phantom saw him too, was it really so bad…?

"_Rhetorical, Youngblood,"_ Phantom corrected, his voice laced with a little exasperation,_ "and it means it's a question for the sake of a question, or something like that."_

"_W-what a-a-bout the l-l-lights?" _Lance's voice questioned.

Just then, what sounded like a rush of wind flowed through the speakers and torches roared to life, illuminating the castle and allowing the teenagers to see the ghosts once again. The specters' audience gasped and stared at the medieval castle in shock and fascination.

The ghosts were located in a relatively wide hallway. On either side of them were empty cases of armor with sharp pointy objects—also called weapons—held close against them. After every other armor, a torch was placed, the supernatural fire burning merrily as if it had been doing so for centuries.

Danny Phantom blinked and spun around in a circle, his mouth in a small 'O' that was very endearing to Paulina. The firelight from the torches lit up his face and caught in his eyes, making his neon irises dance beautifully. An orange halo was created in his snow white hair and Paulina could easily picture him in the sunset, with her, on the beach...

Paulina sighed dreamily and slowly sat down on the arm of the couch a jock hastily vacated.

"_Impressed, Ghost Child?"_ Skulker asked, his voice sounding smug.

Paulina came out of her Phantom-induced stupor and looked at the other ghosts on the screen. Her eyes narrowed competitively on the Ember McClain, the rock star ghost. If there was one ghost who would be a tough rival for Phantom's heart, it was Ember McClain. After all, who could compete with a hot pop star? And if Paulina wasn't mistaken, she had seen some jealousy come from the ghost.

Phantom's mouth closed and he turned to face the ghosts again, an arrogant smirk on his face. _"Nah, Skulker. I'm just amazed to see how much this place _hasn't_ changed."_

The ghosts gawked at him, causing the Ghost Boy's smirk to grow. Paulina and the other teenagers began to smirk as well, pleased to see their hero stun his enemies.

"_You remember it?" _Ember asked, sounding surprised. _"From the Pariah incident?"_

"_Well, it was one of my hardest battles, but no." _Phantom shrugged. _"I remember this place from the 'Fright Knight incident'."_

"_Fright Knight incident?" _Skulker questioned.

"_Two Halloweens ago, I came here and I, uh…accidentally released the Fright Knight." _Phantom chuckled sheepishly and rubbed his neck.

Most of the ghosts groaned and rolled their eyes. Dora smiled and said teasingly, _"You cause a lot of trouble, don't you, Sir Phantom?" _Paulina wasn't sure if the princess was a threat to the ghost boy's heart or not. They seemed to be only friends, but she was a _princess_…

"_May-be…" _Phantom smiled again. _"But I always fix things, don't I?"_

The new ghost that looked like a jailor growled and grumbled something to himself, Skulker snorted but had a small grin on his face, Ember and Desiree rolled their eyes, and the…wolfman let his tongue loll out of his mouth.

"_Anyway, we should get going to the wedding, right?" _the Ghost Boy asked. He didn't wait for an answer and instead spun around and began walking down the hall.

The ghosts followed them calmly, leaving Lance behind. The weatherman-turned-cameraman gasped and hurried to catch up to them.

"_Do you even know where you're going, Ghost Child?" _Skulker demanded.

"_No, not really, but I figure I'll eventually reach the party." _He smiled over his shoulder at them and Paulina giggled at how charming her Ghost Boy looked.

"_We're not going to the wedding party yet, Dipstick," _Ember reminded. _"We're going to get you cleaned up."_

Phantom grimaced and his shoulders sagged. _"I was hoping you had changed your mind about that," _he said miserably.

Paulina's lips puckered. _Wait. What are they talking about?_

"You know," Starr whispered slowly, "we would know what they were talking about if you hadn't ruined your make-up."

Paulina scowled at her. "Well, if you had fixed it faster, we would have been down here sooner!" she retorted quietly.

Starr huffed, but didn't comment.

"_With the way you look now, dipstick, I wouldn't count on that," _Ember said, a small smirk of her own now on her face. Phantom sulkily continued walking down the hall.

A teenage boy standing behind the couch cleared his throat and leaned over the back towards the two A-list girls. He smiled a smile he probably thought was charming and said, "I could tell you what's been going on, if you want."

Starr made a disgusted noise and was about to tell the teenager off when Paulina suddenly smiled flirtatiously. She leaned towards the boy as well so only a few inches separated them. The boy blushed hotly and his smile turned nervous, evidently new to flirting with popular, hot girls.

"Oh yeah?" Paulina asked softly, openly running her eyes over the boy's body. "Would you please? I would so love to hear what has been happening to the Ghost Boy…"

The boy's blush got redder and he opened his mouth to speak. A squeak came out and he cleared his throat again. "Uh, well, see, Phantom doesn't, uh, look his best so the girl ghosts, uh—"

A large hand suddenly shoved the boy's face, causing him to fall back with a loud cry of surprise.

"Shh!" the crowd hissed.

The girls barely spared the fallen boy a glance and instead looked at Kwan who had been the one to push the teenager over.

He smiled at them and whispered, "His voice was getting on our nerves."

Paulina smirked and Starr asked, "Our?"

"The birthday boy finally showed up," he explained, jerking his thumb behind him.

Paulina blinked and looked around the big jock to the one sitting beside him. Dash was on the edge of his seat, staring at the screen with wide, excited eyes, clearly entranced. "Oh," Paulina said impassively, "I hadn't noticed."

Dash glanced at her before he looked back at the TV. "I barely noticed you too, Paulina."

Paulina huffed.

"Anyway," Kwan said to prevent a fight, "Not much has happened, but right now, Danny Phantom is being marched to his doom, as he put it once before."

Paulina gasped and looked frantically at the TV. "He's what?"

"I'm pretty sure he was just being sarcastic," Kwan assured quickly. "They're really just taking him to get cleaned up and into a tuxedo."

Paulina pictured her Ghost Boy in a tux and smiled dreamily. She studied Phantom again and noticed how messy he looked, but that just gave him a wild appearance that was oddly attractive to her, especially with the tree bark in his hair. Like a ghostly Tarzan…

"…_walking for a while," _Phantom's voice was saying, sounding tired. _"Are we almost there yet?"_

"_You're not very big on patience, are you, whelp?"_ Skulker asked.

"_Nope," _Phantom replied cheekily.

"_We're almost there, Sir Phantom," _Dora assured calmly.

"_How close is 'almost there'?" _Phantom asked.

"_Five feet," _Ember answered.

"_What?"_

"_See that door five feet away?" _Ember asked slowly, pronouncing each syllable as if Phantom wasn't smart enough to keep up. She pointed a finger at a door that was designed with green fire. _"Go in there and you'll have reached your destination."_

Phantom glared at her and Paulina did the same. _How dare she treat the Ghost Boy like he's stupid! He's probably the smartest guy around!_

"_I'm not stupid, Ember," _Phantom claimed and Paulina grinned at having the same thoughts as her 'soul mate'. He walked ahead of their small crowd and pushed the door open. _"All you had to do was tell me what door was—Holy hell! Danielle?"_

Paulina jolted. "Danielle?" she squeaked. "Who the hell is _Danielle_?"

"Shut up!" her peers yelled.

Paulina gasped and stared around her in shock. She had never been told to shut up before…

Starr scowled at the crowd. She grabbed Paulina's shoulder and pulled it, turning her away from the teenage population. "It's alright, Paulina," she whispered scornfully, still glaring at the teens. "They're just caught up in the moment and want to know who this…Danielle person is, too."

_She's probably the ghost boy's 'friend', _Paulina thought miserably as she stared at the screen. Lance Thunder seemed to be battling within himself to either push his way through the ghosts to see what was happening or stay where he was and wait for the ghosts to get out of his way. Paulina scowled. _Oh just go already, you coward! I have to know who this Danielle person is!_

**Don't you all just want to kill me now? lol, sorry. I had to! It was just screaming to be a cliffhanger! There's only one person who know what's going to happen, and that's because they gave me the idea ;D**

**Hopefully, an update will be sooner. However, after I get the next chapter up, this story is going to take a back seat to my other story. That one is coming to a close, so I'm going to need to focus on it more. The good knews is that after I finish it, this one will be my top priority! It won't go on hiatus or anything; the updates will just be slower.**

**Next chapter we meet Danielle, force Danny to get cleaned up, and get a surprise visit from...**

**What, you really think I'd spoil it? ;D**

**...Shoot, now I have to go babysit. I'll be back to reply to the old reviews soon!**

**Until next time! Thanks for reading and leave a review if you can! Hope this one was as much fun, even if it wasn't as funny as the last few...or was it? Urgh, let me know.**


	7. Dress Up

**Hey everybody! I'm back! ...Okay, okay, no more long absences! Stop yelling! Three months tops! ...Ah, that's the deal! Breaks are healthy! I'm determined to get at least three chapters up in between them.**

**To the reviewers:  
inuyashaxkagome321: **Probably ready to murder me right now then, huh? Sorry! I think the end is kind of a cliffhanger...  
**Bluegoo2: **Thanks! I based Paulina's and Starr's conversation on one my sisters had with each other, lol. Sorry it took so long. Dani is here-she's what gave me so much trouble. Hope you enjoy it!  
**stick fight3: **Thanks :) Well, Paulina always greets him by 'Danny' and his friends by...kind of insults, so I figure she took the time to learn his first name-he is her ticket to Phantom, after all. I honestly don't know what Danielle will do later in the story...but I love cujo, too! Eh, Dani will probably be like the little kids at boring parties *wink*  
**Serial-Doodler: **...I suppose you hate them even more now...lol. Thanks! I fixed it, but it took me a while. Confusing site...  
**Donteatacowman: **Thanks! Paulina and Starr were so hard to do! Surprisingly, so was Dani...I must have a problem writing girls or something. Me too. They're so much easier to write...Thank you and welcome ;D  
**xxBakaAkki: **lol, well she's here now! She was difficult, but I think I got her now. I don't really like her, but I'm determined not to let that show. Clearly you and others do, so I'll do my best ;D She is still a good character, after all. Thank you! *Bows* lol, I thought of Box Lunch-which was probably your intention.  
**Anonymous: **Cliffy! Love them! Unfortunetly, we won't get very much reaction for the knowledge. Maybe next chapter. Thanks, I'm glad you think so. She is very infuriating...It might as well have been...I feel awful...And I didn't even finish my other story!  
**Bubbely-chan: **Groans, you got me thinking about it... Yup, but it's also spanish for 'cow'. At least, it is according to my beta and mom...if I'd spelled it with a 'v'... Somebody else's ideas. Yours will be later-like in the climax or something. lol.  
**E350: **Thanks ;) Lance doesn't get enough love...Probably.  
**ThisIsMeAndOnlyMe: **O.o Lol! I bet you were thinking about getting them out ;)  
**Darianella: **Thanks! I'm having a lot of fun with it too, so it's like a perfect story XD  
**hawkflyer667: **lol, I almost did too. So far, stress and paranoia, lol. Thanks!  
**Ultramanus Nexus: **Nope, not yet. But soon. *Laughs evily*  
**-kicker: **Thanks :D lol, yeah, but poor Paulina. She's jumping to conclusions. Lol! She's not necessarily out of town, and I could see her doing that too! I love the image. I can't use it now, but can I later? I have an idea for it...Cliffys are so much fun though!  
**DP-in-shrine-girl: **lol, that's okay. Everybody seems to be. *sigh* even me sometimes. Thank you! I have the most trouble with girls, it seems. Yeah, Danny's an all around cute guy-stupid fictional characters and their cuteness. Yeah, I recently found out I spelled it wrong. It sounds the same, but it's supposed to be 'vaca' which meas cow.  
**deadlydaisy8o8: **Thanks! Sorry I made you waite so long...  
**dragondancer123: **lol, yeah, but I like to read your reviews without corrections attached, too. lol.  
**crazylittlequack: **lol, how's this? It's a bit longer...  
**Mi Bi Looney: **I should probably run for my life, huh, lol. Patience eventually runs out...I think I did leave a cliffhanger...  
**PhantomMouse1115: **Yeah. I'm not sure what it is yet, but I know I want the truth to come out about Dani. Thanks.  
**PinkPanther123: **Thanks, your review made me laugh XD  
**JapeneseAnimeFreak: **Thanks! I wish it was an episode...It'd be my favorite! Lol, yeah. Danny is freakin' awesome-and cute. lol, you tell her! But it's fun to see her fantasize about what she can't have.  
**SweetLilNothing: **lol, okay! You got it.  
**musiclover9419: **Thanks! The minor characters don't get enough air time. Sorry, it took long to update...  
**peppymint: **lol, here she is! I hope I did your idea justice.  
**i 3 lamp: **lol, Thank you. I have an idea for Dan, don't worry. Danny had to use a suit to defeat Pariah, but was able to fight Dan with lesser inventions. I don't know...but Pariah _will _get some air time too.  
**TweenisodeOrange: ***Groans* it was a nightmare, but thanks :D  
**Thunderstorm101: **And man is her bad side...uh, bad...but her dreams are funny to laugh at. Thanks :)  
**Ladel: **Thanks! :D I try really hard with them.  
**amanda404: **Ah, gee, thanks so much :D I'm sure there's some somewhere, but I'm glad it's not obvious. I'm excited for when it does happen.  
**VladdieChica: **Sure! Or at least, the POV will be in the GZ. Aw, thank you! I love sugar highs XD  
**SF3:** Well, I already got an idea, but I can use that for a way to explain how Frostbite knows Dani. It's too goo a idea, thanks!  
**Technus: **I seriousy lol'd at that. I'll bring you back in soon.  
**Anne Camp aka Obi-quiet: **Thank you! I'm not exactly sure where it's going either, but it'll be fun finding out. Thanks, and I'm sorry I made you wait so long.  
**Sky Dragon Queen:** Whoohoo! I'm famous/popular! ...More or less. Lol, thanks :D  
**Dragon260: **Bu-but I like them! lol. We don't see their reactions yet, but we meet her!  
**Shiro Inutoko: **lol, Thanks. It's really grown on me. The humor story seems more popular than the slightly more serious HL one :( Ah well, I guess that's just because I'm better at humor XP Nah, I don't mind. Wow, I never knew that. I'd asked other people too, but they said they didn't know. Huh, learn something new every review. Lol, thanks for teling me!  
**Jiyle: **Thanks! I loved the tree scene the best. Three months later and I'm finally updating...  
**Arisu Tsunaru: **yeah, lazy us...:( makes you feel terrible huh. Urgh. Thanks! I'm glad you enjoy it so much! I'm having lots of fun too.  
**Sezony: **Thank you so much! I feel bad for not updating, so I'm going to update this as much as I can while I finish HL. I kind of want to focus on one story at a time, but I like switchin back and forth too. I'm sorry I made you wait so long. Your review did inspire me, but I froze up again a page later because my family pulled me out of my writing funk to 'socialize'. Nah, I needed to get out, but it was hard to get back at it. I am a Zelda fan. I'll check it out! Is it ooc or TP or what? Thanks again!  
**Shay Durrow: **Thanks! I love character interaction too. I think that's why I love writing this story so much...at least, wen I don't have writer's block. lol, I'm sorry. I know those stories-I've actually cried over one before-but this story will never be one, if only because my sister will yell at me again...lol, thanks! Nah, they're jus naturally adorable ;D  
**PurpleWabbit:** Thank you! You had me smiling like a major idiot :D I will finish it-it just may take a while. Anyway, thank you again!  
**ihonestydontknow:** How did you know? lol.  
**AbyssalDaemon: **Thanks :) I'm having a lot of fun doing the blending-huh, sounded weird. I know! I can't wait! I think I'm going to do something like that too. I hope I can pull Dan off, though.  
**RyuuKitsune9: **Yup. Next chapter in fact!  
**Deviously Ruined Rose: **Thanks! I'm sorry took so long.  
**Hyperpegsi: **lol, XD I love pictures, but I'm lazy about replying to them. If they do ever proof them, teenagers would lose one of our strongest weapos ;D lol, yeah, I didn't notice it until my beta pointed it out.  
**Lady Canu, Lexie, Trinity Fenton-Phantom, acosta perez jose ramio **(is that French?), **FantasyChick, Ella, lilyt789, digiwriter1592, Kitty Fowl, Aurora Aurie, foxglove66, Echo Nightingale-Phantom, megg15, Xdon't-mind-meX, and Kalauer: **Thank you guys! I'm glad you like my story :D I'm sorry it took me so long to update...  
**63 reviews O.o I love you guys, but you make me feel so guilty! Like really guilty...**

**This chapter's a bit longer than usual. I hope it makes up for some of my lateness.**

**I don't own Danny Phantom. peppymint came up with the idea of Dani's introduction. An dragondancer123 is my beta. She (and my sister) helped me out of my writer's block.**

* * *

Chapter 7  
Dressing up

"Danielle?"

Dani—or Danielle—spun around, her silky dress flowing outwards to twist around her legs as she turned. She scanned the room, trying to find who shouted her name. Movement from the doorway caught her eye and she quickly looked in that direction. For a moment, her green eyes connected with identical eyes filled with horror and rising protectiveness. One clear thought ran through Dani's mind at that moment; _Danny does _not_ look pleased…_

Then someone ran into Danny's back and their eye contact was broken as he and a group of ghosts fell to the floor in a heap. A human—someone Dani vaguely recognized as the underpaid weatherman from Amity Park—stood over them with a camera, looking guilty and more than a little fearful. The ghosts struggled to untangle themselves, yelling at each other to get off.

Walker shouted something about imprisonment for assaulting an officer. Ember yelled at Skulker to watch where he put his hands. Her boyfriend yelled back he wasn't even near her. Youngblood continued screaming about a plank. Princess Dora lost her visage of a proper lady by yelling out curse words even Dani never heard before. Wulf wasn't too bothered, but didn't look pleased about being in such close proximity to his jailer. Cujo ran free around the pile, barking excitedly and adding to the overall confusion. Danny growled, a green glow steadily enveloping his body. The weatherman trembled, too scared to help but worried they would be angry with him if he didn't.

Some of the toughest ghosts in the Ghost Zone were reduced to nothing more than a squirming pile of insults and violated space issues. Dani couldn't help giggling at the sight, especially when her 'cousin' got his face shoved into the floor. _I wish I had a camera..._Her eyes landed on the crazy weatherman with a camera and giggled again.

* * *

Back at the ghost pile, Danny growled in annoyance when an elbow jammed him in the ribs _again_. He tried to hit the offending specter back, but a hand suddenly pushed down on his head and introduced his face to the floor. He closed his eyes, trying to reign in his aggravation so he wouldn't do something he might regret later. But an image of Dani in a _way _too revealing dress flashed through his mind and all thoughts of restraint left the castle.

Another growl ripped its way out Danny's throat and the half ghost's eyes snapped open, this time glowing brighter. Shrieks of surprise came from above him, but Danny ignored them. He got to his feet with very little resistance and marched his way into the room, intent on giving his grinning 'cousin' a piece of his mind.

Lance gaped up at the floating ghosts. They were thrashing in midair, trying to get back down, their faces scrunched up in shock. He guessed they weren't the ones doing the levitating. He brought the camera back down; capturing Danny's straightened back while the ghost hero walked further into the room with a purposeful, determined stride. He had a green aura around him, much like the ghosts unwillingly being suspended in air.

"_Wow,"_ the boss woman said in awe.

Lance nodded wordlessly, still staring wide-eyed at the focused ghost teen.

The glow disappeared and the specters dropped to the floor. They whined out in protest, but Danny ignored them. Lance took a step back, worried they would blame him for their tumble before. The ghosts picked themselves up, mumbling unhappily, but seeming to forget his presence altogether.

"Darn punk," Walker groused. "I'll add another _thousand_ years to his imprisonment. No one levitates me without my consent!"

"I'm sure he has a perfectly reasonable explanation," Dora said softly.

"What?" Ember demanded. "He didn't like us touching him?"

Dora shook her head. "He seems concerned about Danielle," she pointed out.

"Danielle?" Ember questioned. Her face lit up in understanding, a smirk coming to her blue lips. "Oh yeah. Heh, I guess the rumors about the dipstick are true."

Lance perked up, leaning forward eagerly. Rumors in the media business world were like verbal gold (lol, I like the verbal part.). He didn't want to draw attention to himself—especially with Danny so far away—but he knew his boss would be on him if he didn't get every last piece of information he could. "E-excuse me," he began slowly, "but what rumors?"

Ember looked at him in surprise. "You mean you humans don't know?"

Lance frowned. "Um..."

"Of course not," Desiree cut in. "Phantom tends to keep secrets from his chosen species."

Lance pursed his lips. He was aware that Amity's ghostly hero was secretive, but it seemed Danny didn't keep such secrets from the ghosts. He wondered why it was all right for his enemies to know, but not humans—the beings he chose to protect.

Dora looked at him thoughtfully, making him a little uneasy. But then, as if she could read his mind—which was possible when dealing with ghosts—the medieval princess said softly, "Human ghost hunters are dangerous too. Especially to Sir Phantom."

"What do you mean?"

Dora shook her head, unwilling to explain further.

"The whelp is one of a kind," Skulker said, smiling evilly.

"Until recently, that is," Ember added, "if the rumors are true, anyway."

"_What_ rumors?" Lance demanded, impatience overcoming his fear temporarily.

Skulker smirked, amused. "Oh, just a rumor floating around about the Ghost Child being '_related'_ to another ghost child who happens to share his unique condition."

Lance blinked. "What?"

"They say they're cousins," Ember whispered, as if it was confidential, "but we have our suspicions."

"What kind of suspicions?" Lance whispered back, caught up in the mood.

"That the dipstick was—"

"Don't you have anything better to do than gossip?" Dora interrupted coolly.

Ember's eyes widened a fraction before they narrowed on the princess. "No, actually, I don't. If it means causing trouble for the dipstick, you better believe I'll rock the boat."

Dora turned to Lance, apparently disinterested in what Ember had to say. "If you want to know who Danielle is, you should ask Sir Phantom himself. She is, after all, very important to him."

Lance hesitated. While the viewers would like to know who Danielle was, they also liked juicy gossip—whether it was true or not. Lance weighed the pros and cons for a moment before he remembered these ghosts regularly attacked Amity Park…and his protection from them wasn't there.

He nodded his thanks to the kind princess then rushed after his town's hero.

* * *

'_Ghosts believe Dani and Phantom are lying about being cousins,' _Valerie scribbled messily in her notebook. '_Dani and Phantom share a unique condition…If they aren't cousins, what could they be? And if they share a unique condition, what is it?' _

"Is that necessary, Valerie?"

Valerie smiled at her father, her eyes sparkling. "Of course, Daddy! This is _gold_!"

Damien crossed his arms and gave his daughter a stern look. "You're on vacation, Valerie," he reminded.

_More like grounded,_ Valerie thought grouchily while pouting at her father.

After a ghost fight landed her in the hospital a week ago, Damien put his foot down and 'suggested' she take a vacation. She couldn't hunt ghosts, she couldn't leave the house after eight, she couldn't discuss ghosts, and worst, she couldn't watch ghost shows to get further insight on her enemies. This suggestion of a 'vacation' was backed up by a threat to tell the Fentons about Valerie's awesome ghost hunting skills if she didn't take it. It was a scary thought because they might try to make her their apprentice. Not only did she prefer working alone, an apprenticeship would mean getting close to Danny again.

Valerie had agreed after some haggling, but was beginning to wish she hadn't. The so-called vacation was _torture_. Not only was she unable to hunt ghosts when they were harming the town, they also _knew_. They bloody _knew._ Just yesterday, Phantom had the audacity to _smirk_ at her when he saved _her_ from a ghost. Oh, how she wanted to shoot the smug look off the ghost's face…

The disguised torture had been going well until Damien turned the news on. To Damien's chagrined surprise and Valerie's wicked amusement, the picture that came up was Danny Phantom, greatest known ghost, and Valerie's personal arch enemy hugging a tree for his dear afterlife.

The following hour was spent with father and daughter arguing, making deals, and haggling. The end deal was Valerie could watch the show, but she would have to tack on another two days of 'vacation'.

_I finally get to focus on what the ghosts are saying,_ Valerie grumbled inside her head,_ and Daddy bans note taking. Where is the justice here?_

"But I have to write it all down, Daddy," Valerie pleaded. "If I don't, I might forget it."

Damien shook his head and leaned against their rickety couch. "You have a good memory, Val. You can remember."

"But, Daddie—"

"No, Valerie!" Damien cut off. "You're lucky I'm letting you watch this at all. Now put that notebook away and just. _Watch_. That was the deal."

Valerie sighed in defeat and set her notebook on the coffee table. "Yes, Dad." She looked back at the television, determined to remember _everything_.

Lance Thunder had reached Danielle and Phantom by this time. The two continued to glare stubbornly at each other, but for what, Valerie didn't know. Dani and Phantom seemed close the last time she saw them.

_They must have gotten into an argument, _she thought.

"_Who…" _Lance panted, _"Who is…"_

Phantom sighed, closing his eyes tiredly. He waved a hand at Dani and said, _"Mr. Thunder, Amity Park. Meet my cousin, Danielle Phantom. Or Dani."_

"_With an 'I'," _Dani added quickly. She smiled at the camera. _"Hello."_

"What a polite child," Damien remarked. He studied the little ghost's green eyes and long white hair curiously. "They do look remarkably similar."

Valerie pursed her lips together and nodded. The thought of the sweet little girl being related to Phantom still gave her a bad taste in her mouth.

"_Ah," _Lance mumbled intelligently. "_Well, uh, I think I speak for all of Amity Park when I say it's nice to meet you, Danielle."_

Dani grinned and nodded back to him.

"_Oh sure," _Phantom grumbled. _"You use _her_ first name."_

Dani put her hands on her hips and glared at her cousin. _"And what's your problem, Mr. Grumpy attitude? You've only been here for like__,__ five minutes, and already you're sucking all the fun out of the party."_

"_Me?" _Phantom asked indignantly. _"What's my problem? My problem is you!"_

"_Me?"_

"_Yes! Just what the _hell_ are you wearing, Danielle?"_

Dani looked down at herself then raised an eyebrow at Phantom. _"A dress…"_

Phantom growled and ran agitated hands through his hair. _"Yeah, I noticed, but _why_ are you _showing_ so much?"_

Valerie frowned and gave Dani's dress an appraising look. The dress was made of green silk that matched Dani's eyes perfectly, even going so far as to shine when the lights hit it just like when the ghost girl's eyes lit up. It reached past Dani's knees, but was slit on both sides to mid thigh. It hugged her hips and chest, showing off her developing curves. However, the most objectionable part for Phantom was probably the absence of sleeves of any kind.

Valerie had to admit, it was a very grown up dress, and felt herself become mildly protective of Dani as well. After all, the girl was half human and currently surrounded by ghosts.

"_What's wrong with it?" _Dani demanded, narrowing her eyes.

"_Wha—don't—urgh—_Everything_!"_ Phantom shouted. He waved his arms around in the air comically and Valerie clamped a hand over her mouth to keep from snickering. _"Where are the sleeves? What's with the slits? And it's too tight on you! We need to get you a new dress!" _He reached for Dani's hand, but she pulled away quickly.

"_What?"_ Dani cried. She wrapped her arms around herself and glared fire at Phantom. _"No! I like it!"_

"_You're only twelve!" _Phantom argued. _"You can't wear _that_!" _He pointed accusingly at the dress.

"_Why not?" _Dani demanded. _"Auntie said I looked great and I've gotten a lot of compliments from the other ghosts!"_

"_So guys older than _me_ hitting on you isn't a problem at all?" _Phantom crossed his arms over his own chest and glared at the ghosts watching them. _"We're getting you a new dress."_

Dani huffed and shook her head. _"You're not my dad, you can't make me." _Phantom opened his mouth to shout something, closed it, and raised an eyebrow at her. She scowled. _"And don't start that!"_

"_Father or not, you can't wear that."_

"_Yes I can."_

"_No, you can't."_

"_Can too!"_

"_Cannot!"_

"_Can!"_

"_Not!"_

"_CAN!"_

"_NOT!"_

"_CAN!"_

"_NO—"_

"_WHAT IS GOING ON OUT THERE!"_ an accented voice screamed over Dani's and Phantom's shouting match.

Both Phantoms turned around quickly and the camera followed their gaze. A large woman ghost stood in the doorway of another room. She had scissors inserted in her white hair, which was stylized in a bun atop her head. Smaller ghosts peeked around her to stare curiously out into the room.

"_Just a family reunion between ghost children, Lady Hairdresser," _a voice off-screen answered. It sounded like Skulker.

"_Auntie!" _Dani called, flying over to the large ghost. _"Auntie, Danny doesn't like the dress you made for me! He said it's all wrong!"_

"If they're cousins," Damien said thoughtfully, "and Danielle calls that woman 'auntie', does that mean she's Danny Phantom's mother?"

Valerie gaped at her father and then the television. The woman had white hair and green eyes like the two Phantoms, but she had a Russian accent, too. Could Phantom be of mixed orientation? _I'll have to keep my eyes on the two, _Valerie decided.

"_He did, eh?"_ the woman asked dangerously, giving Phantom a nasty look. _"And what is wrong with it?"_

"_She's twelve!" _Phantom shouted, throwing his hands into the air. _"Am I the only one who sees the problem here? There's cleavage, and, and, just no! She can get another dress!"_

"_I am afraid she cannot," _the woman replied, not sounding apologetic. _"You see, I tailored that dress and I would have to make a new one if she were to wear a different dress."_

"_Can't you?" _Phantom pleaded desperately. _"Make a new one for her, I mean?"_

The woman's green face suddenly turned purple. _"NO!" _she shouted. Valerie and Damien jumped back in shock and Lance nearly dropped the had a voice like a drill sergeant. _"Miss Danielle's dress is perfect!"_

Phantom took a step back and held up his hands in a placating motion. _"Uh, you're right. It's a very nice dress…but maybe you could add sle—"_

"_NO!" _Phantom's hair actually flew back at the shout and he stumbled back a step. _"NO SLEEVES!"_

"_Um…o-okay…"_ Phantom mumbled, smiling nervously. _"You know best…"_

The compliment seemed to appease Lady Hairdresser, if only slightly. Her skin returned to its normal color, at least. Dani smirked at her cousin and held up two fingers, victory style. Phantom glared at her and crossed his arms over his chest.

"Wow," Damien said. "That was…interesting."

Valerie shrugged. "Most ghosts are like that when defending or announcing their obsession."

"Phantom's not like that," he observed, his lips twitching when Valerie's self-satisfied look vanished.

"He doesn't have an obsession so he doesn't count!"

Damien cocked his head to the side and stared at the ghost teen on the screen. "But I thought all ghosts had obsessions."

Valerie frowned. She huffed and looked away. "We just don't know his obsession, is all. He's probably obsessed with fighting or those stupid puns of his."

"…_are you anyway," _Phantom was asking the ghost woman. _"Are you related to the Lunch Lady? Because…um, never mind."_

"_That is my tailor, Sir Phantom," _Dora answered off-screen. _"We hired her after my brother was removed from power. She's called Lady Hairdresser." _

Lance turned the camera to the group of ghosts still standing in the doorway of the waiting room.

"_She is also your tailor for tonight, Dipstick," _Ember informed smugly. _"Won't that be fun?"_

Danny groaned, his shoulders slumping. Cujo ran over to him and jumped into his arms, licking his face to try to cheer him up. He laughed and scratched his dog's ears. _"Thanks, Cujo."_

_And he said it wasn't his dog,_ Valerie thought angrily, glaring at the mutt.

Before the ghost dog could get another licking session in, a green hand grabbed him by the scruff of his neck and yanked him away from Phantom. The ghost teen gasped in surprise and reached out for his puppy, but Lady Hairdresser held Cujo out of his reach.

"_No dogs in my workroom,"_ she announced. An assistant rushed to her side just in time to catch the puppy. The tailor glanced over Phantom's appearance and sniffed, turning away. _"Come, we have much work to do."_

Phantom scowled at her back until a gentle shove from Dora made him follow along behind her. Lance and the other ghosts trailed them, chortling the way only ghosts could. Lance shook, making the image blurry. Phantom smiled over his shoulder at him, and seemed to calm the weatherman down.

Valerie scoffed and rolled her eyes. It was ridiculous how much faith Lance had put into the ghost teen.

* * *

"You've got to be kidding me!"Danny shouted.

"I do not kid, boy,"Lady Hairdresser said menacingly, glaring at the stalling hero. "I cannot measure you when you are clothed! Now remove that ridiculous outfit so I may make you a more appropriate one for my fat cousin's wedding!"

"But this suit is skin tight!"Danny continued to protest. He pinched some of his suit and pulled at it away from him. "See?"

"No I don't see. Strip, boy, before I make you!"

Danny's eyes strayed to the camera, pink tinting his cheeks clearly. "But…B-but the other ghosts don't have to see!"

The familiar group of ghosts who had retrieved Danny still needed to get their own clothes changed. They were getting fitted for their own suits now, and stood—fully clothed—a little ways away, watching the show as Lady Hairdresser's assistances measured them. They seemed to be enjoying themselves immensely. Ember and Skulker were even openly laughing.

Danny gazed at them enviously.

The tailor's hair suddenly burst into white fire and she got a crazy look in her red eyes as the irises expanded. "STRIP NOW, BOY!"the ghost yelled.

Danny let out a yelp and jumped back. He turned intangible, allowing all but his boxers to fall to the ground. He sulkily crossed his arms over his chest before the camera could get a good look at it, but if his toned stomach was any indication, there was no reason to hide it. However, the Ghost Boy seemed to be the modest type since his face was once again imitating a tomato. He absolutely refused to look in the camera's direction.

"Is this revenge for earlier?"he demanded of the ghost.

Lady Hairdresser calmed down immediately and smiled sweetly at the embarrassed boy. "What makes you think that? You only insulted my pride and joy. It's nothing to get upset about. Now remove your arms from your chest."

It seemed impossible, but even more red flooded into Phantom's face. Some even migrated to his neck. He glared at the tailor ghost. "I don't like you…" he grumbled.

"The feeling's mutual, boy, now get on with it! I have other things to do than coddle a boy's wounded dignity."

Phantom sighed and raised his arms to the side, leaving himself exposed to the cameras.

Lance's boss wolf-whistled through his ear piece. He flinched and rubbed his sore ear.

"Good boy."The tailor took out a measuring tape rope and advanced on Phantom—who seemed fascinated with the cracks littering the wall.

"_Nice bod…" _the boss said.

_He's only sixteen!_ Lance shouted in his head. _Honestly, woman. You're over thirty-five years old! _

"Stand up _straight_, boy!" Lady Hairdresser hollered. She grabbed his shoulders and forced them back. "You slouch as if you're being marched to the gallows!"

Danny grunted in annoyance, but stood up straight. "I _am_."

"Ha, ha! Good one, boy!" The tailor woman laughed and slapped Danny on his bare back. He flinched.

"_The phones are ringing like crazy, Lance!" _Boss shouted. _"Mind relaying some questions to Phantom from the audience?"_

"Actually-" Lance started.

"_What am I thinking? Of course you will! That's what I'm paying you for!"_

Lance hesitated a moment longer before calling to the ghostly hero.

Danny looked uncertainly in his direction. "Yeah?"

"This is my job," Lance whispered 'secretly' to him, a hand covering a side of his mouth from view of the camera. "I have to do this. It's nothing personal."

Danny sighed. "I don't like the sound of that."

Lance cleared his throat and straightened. "Right, well, would you mind answering some of the viewers' questions?"

"Do I have a choice?"

Lance paused. "Um…"

Danny sighed and rolled his eyes, resigned to his fate. "Go ahead, Mr. Thunder," he said.

Lance hesitated a moment. Danny didn't seem comfortable with the idea of answering questions—especially when he was striped to his boxers in front of live television. He appeared to be very modest about his body, too. The weatherman had to admit the scene was like an interrogation.

All the same, he had a job to do, and Danny had already agreed so…

Lance cleared his throat and pressed his earpiece closer to his ear. The earpiece beeped and a static-y voice asked after a pause, "_How long have you been a ghost? Oh, and this is Timmy Grant."_

_Well, that one's not so bad, _Lance thought. "Timmy Grant wants to know how long you've been a ghost."

Danny's face seemed to mirror Lance's thought before he smiled a little wistfully. "Two years."

"_Was it hard? Adjusting to being a ghost, I mean."_

The hero laughed. "Well, I fell through a _lot_ of things, I'll tell you that."

"_I'm Max! What's the best part of being a ghost?"_

"Definitely flying. I can fly over a hundred miles per, too."

Lance coughed at the next question, but his lips twitched upward. "Amanda wants to know if your sexy scars are a result of what killed you, or your hero work.

Danny flushed. "Uh, no, I got them all from hero work…"

Skulker laughed viciously. "Half of those are results of the Hunt!" he boasted.

Danny glared at him.

"_And your muscles? Are they the result of protecting our town, too, or were you always that handsome?"_

Danny blanched and blushed from the roots of his hair to base of his neck. "Um, uh, um…next question?

Ember and Desiree sniggered

Danny's face somehow became redder.

Lance ignored the next question about Danny's muscles and instead relayed, "Max wants to know about Cujo."

The ghost hero seemed to appreciate the change in topic. His blush faded—though a tint of red stubbornly remained—and he smiled fondly. "Well, Cujo was a guard dog working at Axion Labs until they decided guard dogs aren't as reliable and they, uh…yeah. I first met Cujo when he was searching for his squeaky toy. He couldn't remember where it was so I helped him find it and we've been friends ever since…I always wanted a dog, though he isn't quite what I had in mind at the time…"

"_Katherine Anderson. What's your obsession?"_

Danny shrugged unhelpfully.

"Don't move!" Lady Hairdresser scolded.

"_This is Tiffany Snow, Lance. How're you holding up? Oh, why do you protect the city, Mr. Phantom?"_

Lance rolled his eyes and asked the question, leaving out the first one.

Danny raised an eyebrow at the name. "Uh, it feels like the right thing to do, most of the time."

"_Most of the time? What about the others?"_

"The others are when Skulker, Walker, or some other ghost targets me and the city gets caught in the crossfire."

Lance flinched at Tiffany's next question. _"So you're a danger to have around?"_

Danny frowned and opened his mouth to reply, but was interrupted by the other ghosts.

"Will you chase him out of town if he is?" Youngblood asked excitedly.

"It would make things a lot easier if they did," Desiree remarked, placing a finger on her chin.

"Yeah, a little too easy!" Ember complained. "Where's the fun in total world conquest if we can't rub it in the dipstick's face?"

Danny groaned. "Are you _trying_ to help me?"

"As if, baby pop."

"The hunt would be a lot more successful if his friends weren't there to help him," Skulker mused to himself.

"Hey!" Danny shouted. "No plotting at the wedding!"

"It's not against the rules," Walker pointed out.

"Well it should be…"

"_Mathew Lancer. What did you do to earn a thousand years in ghost jail?"_

"It is more than a thousand now," Walker said before Danny could respond. He gave the hero a hateful look.

Danny scoffed and rolled his eyes. "A lame reason, really. I apparently brought illegal 'contraband' into the Ghost Zone and was sentenced a thousand years for it."

"Yes," Walker growled, "but afterwards you staged a riot, led a breakout of all convicts, and resisted arrest countless times!"

"And all at the tender age of fourteen…" Danny hummed to himself, looking pleased.

Walker scowled.

"_This is Dash Baxter, star quarterback of Casper High. Danny Phantom knows me. What was the Fright Knight incident?"_

The other ghosts leaned in, curious about the answer themselves.

Danny's eyes widened and he chuckled weakly. "Um, uh, my friends said I couldn't be scary to save my afterlife, so I went here to get the Soul Shredder…and accidently awoke the Fright Knight when I did."

Ember laughed. "Wow, dipstick. No wonder you're a _good_ ghost. You must fail as a bad one."

"Hey! I won the contest! Or I would have…if we hadn't resealed the Fright Knight…lost the bet, too…"

Lance raised an eyebrow. "Contest? Bet?"

Danny's eyes widened. "T-the contest of with my friends to see which of us was scarier!" he shouted. "The, uh, loser had to do something…uh, distasteful…"

"Which was...?"

Danny looked away, looking a little queasy. "Um, no comment…"

"Must have been something terrible," Skulker whispered gleefully to Ember.

"_This is Damien Gray. Is—"_

"_Daddy, no! I have some questions I need answered!"_

"You_ are on vacation."_

Lance frowned and held the earpiece closer to his ear. It seems the caller was having a discussion with his daughter?

"_But, Daddy! This is—"_

"_Is Lady Hairdresser his mother?" _Damien shouted.

Lance yelped, jerking his head away instinctively. He rubbed his wounded appendage as he relayed the question.

Danny gaped at him then shouted, "Hell no!"

"I would disown the brat," Lady Hairdresser added with a scowl towards Lance.

"Not before I disowned you!"

Lance sighed. His ear had finally stopped ringing, just in time to pick up the next caller's voice.

"_Exactly how many times have you _stolen_ our specter speeder?" _a female's voice demanded in a reprimanding town.

Lance's eyes widened. "Uh, Maddie Fenton wants to know how many times you have stolen the specter speeder."

Danny's eyes widened. "Aren't you supposed to be at a ghost hunter's convection thing?"

"_Answer the question, Ghost Kid."_

"'Steal' is too harsh a word," Danny said evasively, looking at random directions as if he was looking for an escape. "I returned it, so _borrowed_ would be more accurate…"

"_How many times have you 'borrowed' it then?"_

"Um…" Danny looked thoughtfully up at the ceiling. "I don't know…Technically, my friends did most of the borrowing, and they're humans, so you can't get too mad at—"

"_How. Many."_

"I only borrowed it twice! Once was an accident and this…well, does this one really count?"

"_Don't you dare touch __our stuff again,__ Phantom."_

Danny paused a moment before smirking at the camera and saying cheekily, "Yes, mother."

The connection broke with a loud click.

Lance sighed then gave Danny a reproving look. "Are you sure it's alright to antagonize her like that?"

Danny chuckled. "No, but it's hard to resist."

Lance couldn't help smiling a little. He pressed his ear piece again. He frowned curiously and repeated the question. "A caller wishes to remain anonymous and also asks when you planned to tell your friends you'd gotten so built."

Danny, raised an eyebrow, then smirked at the camera again and said, "I was afraid you'd get jealous again."

"_As if! Oh, and we heard what you had to say about your _girlfrie_—Ow!"_

"_Knock it off, Tucker!"_

The connection went dead. Lance frowned and pressed his earpiece closer to his ear. _Was that just his friends? They sounded familiar with him. Tucker…_

Lady Hairdresser stepped back and put her measuring tape away. "All finished."

Danny sighed in relief and bent down to pull his clothes back on, but the tailor grabbed his arm and pulled him back up. "What?" he whined.

"You are filthy," Lady Hairdresser scolded, pulling a twig out of Danny's hair. "You must take a shower." She began pushing the unwilling hero towards another room. "Your suit will be ready when you are done."

"That fast?" Danny asked, raising an eyebrow at her.

"That fast, now wash!" She shoved him through the door and closed it. She pointed a finger at Lance and shouted, "You!" Lance jumped, backing up a step. "You disturb my workers. Out, out!"

Lance hesitated looking at the door Danny had disappeared through. "But…"

"OUT!"

Lance gasped and quickly fled the room. He turned to give one last longing look inside before the doors slammed shut in his face.

"Lance Thunder of Amity Park, I presume?" a smooth voice asked from behind him.

The weatherman spun around, the camera shaking.

A vampire-looking ghost smiled, revealing sharp canine teeth, and held out a blue hand to Lance. "Vlad Plasmius, Danny Phantom's father."

* * *

**So...did you like it? ...You want to kill me even more for leaving it there, huh? lol, sorry. I guess I am addicted.**

**Vlad in next chapter! Yay! Also, I'm probably going to get Maddie's and Jack's POV. I'm afraid, though, because I know for a fact I'm having trouble getting them IC. **

**I don't actually like Danielle, but I'm going to ignore my feelings. She will be just as important as the rest of the ghosts. I hope I did alright with her...**

**Until next time! I hope you enjoyed! Thanks for reading and please leave a review! Even if it is to yell at me for taking so long...**


	8. Lie to the Camera

**Sorry, guys, but this chapter did _not _want to be written. I lost track of how many times I had to rewrite it all-and it still didn't turn out the way I had hoped.**

**To the (wow, there's a lot of you!) reviewers:  
My family and I are going on vacation today (and I'm still behind on my packing-procrastination is more evil than texting!) so I don't have time to reply to all of you at the moment. But I recently found out I'm not supposed to write replies here, anyway, so I'm going to start replying by PM. It'll be a lot easier in the long run (because I'll reply after every review rather than waiting until I finish a chapter) and it'll also help me with my fears of conversation-I'm shy and try to avoid conversation sometimes, so I'm not very good at replying to PM's (as some of you have probably noticed...).  
So, yeah, thanks for reviewing! You have no idea how much it meant to me! **

**I don't own Danny Phantom. And as always, thanks to my beta dragondancer123.**

**Let me know if Vlad feels IC...he was really difficult to write...**

* * *

Chapter 8  
Lie to the Camera

Danielle checked to make sure the camera was safely out of sight—if Lance decided to walk through the walls, things could get troublesome—and was disturbed to find the other ghosts in the room watching her with an almost creepy sort of anticipation.

The ghost girl put her hands on her hips and raised one eyebrow. "Ever heard of a little thing called _privacy_?"

The tailor ghosts cleared their throats and went back to work, but Danny's enemies continued to watch her. Dani petulantly stuck her tongue at them, earning a few snorts. She turned on her heel, and changed forms. She could still feel the stares, but ignored them in favor of the slight tingle the rings invoked whenever she activated the transformation.

Now human, Dani stepped through the door of Danny's temporary bathroom. Danny—thankfully still wearing his boxers—was inspecting the strangely shaped bathtub. The Ghost Zone had a different bathing system than Earth, so he was probably trying to figure out how to turn the water on.

In the meantime, his guard was down and he wasn't paying any attention at all to his surroundings. Dani smirked and called out sweetly, "Knock, Knock."

"Gyaah!" Danny screamed and overbalanced, falling into the tub. The teen hero sat up and glared at his snickering cousin, but before he could begin yelling, the tub sensors reacted to his ecto signature and switched the water on. Nozzles all along the walls of the bathtub began spraying Danny from all sides.

Dani tried to hold it in. Really she did. But the sight of her original-slash-cousin sputtering and trying in vain to escape the onslaught of water proved too much for her. She burst out laughing.

Danny finally managed to form a sort of ghost-powered dome, protecting him from the raining water. He quickly and carefully climbed out of the tub, allowing the dome to dissipate. As soon as he was out, the water shut off, leaving one very angry, very embarrassed halfa to stand dripping on the marble flooring. He glared at his clone, who was rolling around on the floor holding her stomach and crying tears of mirth.

"Are you done yet?" he asked her.

Dani rubbed tears out her eyes and toned down her laughing. When she could see again, she focused on Danny. If she was a fangirl of his, she would have been rendered speechless.

But she wasn't a fangirl. She was his clone, his cousin at heart. She didn't see a half naked ghost boy glowing in the dim bathroom light. She saw was her cousin, looking like a drowned rat.

She laughed even harder than before.

Danny's cheeks became redder, but he tried to hide it by scowling. "What are you doing in here, Danielle?" he demanded, hoping to divert attention away from his… mishap. "Ever heard of a little thing called privacy?"

Dani giggled a little longer before she got to her feet. She kept her gaze a little to the right of Danny, knowing she wouldn't be able to control herself if she faced him head on. Even with that precaution, it was hard not to replay the whole incident in her head and crack up again.

"I'm sorry, Danny," she said, unable to keep the mirth from her voice.

"Yeah, you should be! What if I was…you know, naked?"

Dani raised an eyebrow. "I'm your _clone_, Danny."

Danny sputtered, waving his hands around chaotically. "Yeah, my _girl_ clone!"

She was about to point out that she was there when Vlad was creating other, _male_ clones, but decided for the sake of Danny's blood pressure, she would keep that to herself.

Danny sighed, running a hand through his wet hair. "Was there something you needed, Dani?"

"Oh yeah!" Dani's mirth vanished, and with it her fear of looking at Danny again without bursting into giggles. "I just thought you should know that weather guy was kicked out of the Lady's Hairdresser's workroom." Danny groaned, face-palming. "What made you think bringing a human—much less a human with a camera—here would be such a good idea, anyway?"

Danny shook his head. "It wasn't my idea. Skulker and the others used him as leverage to get me here."

"Then it's your fault he's here in the first place!" she accused. "The poor guy looks terrified!"

Danny ran his hands through his hair in agitation. "I know! But there's nothing I can do about it now! Even if the ghosts _were_ willing to let me drive him back, the guy wants to tape the whole wedding."

"Well then, we'll just have to make sure he stays out of trouble," Dani reasoned.

Her cousin shook his head. "Easier said than done, Dani. With that camera, all my enemies will be trying to get back at me by blowing my secret." He began pulling at his hair in frustration. "Urgh! I don't have time for this stupid game of dress-up!"

Dani made soothing motions with her hands. "Easy there, Danny. Your fanbase will take a major nosedive if you start going bald." He glared her and she smiled. "Look, I'll just keep an eye on him until Lady Hairdresser finishes with you. I can keep those monkeys off him, no sweat!"

Danny inhaled and then exhaled slowly, closing his eyes. When he opened them again, they seemed calmer and less intense. "Alright. I'm counting on you, Dani."

She waved her hand, as if the whole situation was no big deal. "Yeah, yeah. It's my secret too, you know." She smiled at him. "See you in a bit, Cuz."

She left the bathroom, stepping through the door again as if it was made of nothing. She felt the stares migrate back to her and all conversation ceased. Dani rolled her eyes as she transformed into her ghost half. The ghosts' eyes followed the rings of light with interest, though she was sure they had seen Danny do it a thousand times…

"What?" she finally asked them.

The ghosts didn't answer at first, but then Ember asked, "So you and the dipstick are related?"

Dani frowned at her. "He's my cousin."

"I heard—" Ember was cut off by loud barking outside the workroom, followed closely by a very human scream.

"Sounds like the mutt found the Ghost Child's pet human," Skulker remarked, smirking.

Dani sighed. "Duty calls," she muttered to herself.

She flew over to the opposite door and took the long way out—opening it manually like a normal, un-hybrid-ish person.

Danielle wasn't an experienced fighter like Danny; she couldn't take in a dangerous situation and respond to it within five point two seconds. It takes a while for her brain to process all the information and come to a course of action. It took even longer if a detail derails the whole process.

In the span of opening the door and stepping into the waiting room, Dani took in the situation. Cujo—Danny's usually cute puppy—had transformed into a giant, angry dog. The worker/temporary dog-sitter, was currently cowering in a corner, staring at the large dog in horror. Lance Thunder had fallen on his bottom, but he was still recording the ferocious ghost. Dani would have applauded his commitment to his short-term job as a cameraman, _if_ the camera wasn't a blurred shape within his shaking hands.

At this point, the Dani's thought process was derailed because standing in front of Lance in a possible imitation of a shield…was Vlad Plasmius.

The sight of her 'father' made Dani's inner alarm system start buzzing like a hive of angry bees. Logically, she knew Vlad would make an appearance at the wedding. She wasn't surprised by his presence. It was his actions that had her freaking out and going into panic mode.

Looking good for the camera was his game. He lived to manipulate and thrived on deception. His actions made it clear. He wanted to appear the good guy in Amity Park's eye.

The only question now was _why_.

Dani shook off her paralysis. _Now really isn't the time, _she reminded herself. She stepped further into the room and called, "Cujo!"

Cujo's ears pricked at the sound of her voice. He faltered for a second before snarling at Vlad again. He would have stopped immediately if Danny had called him, and while Dani sounded like him to some degree, the guard dog wasn't going to let up on Danny's archenemy until he received the command from Danny himself.

Feeling slightly inadequate, Dani nevertheless floated over to Cujo and began scratching behind his ears. She had seen humans do that with their pets before, and was hoping the technique would work on ghost dogs too.

Cujo's growls hitched to a stop, a low, confused whine taking their place. He turned his head slightly, trying to catch Dani's scent without taking his eyes off Vlad.

"Hey, boy," Dani whispered into the ear she was scratching, "it's alright. Danny will be here in a bit. He'll deal with the frootloop then, okay? It's alright. Shh."

Cujo, either satisfied by Dani's scent or the sound of Danny's name, gave Vlad one last warning growl before he lay down on the ground. He rested his massive head on equally massive paws and watched Vlad with unblinking red eyes. Even laying down he was taller than Dani.

Danielle stepped a few paces away, seeing if he would attack Vlad once he was given his space. Cujo didn't even twitch.

Sighing, Dani finally faced the two adults and was shocked to see Vlad offering his hand to Lance. Even worse, Lance grabbed the offered appendage without any hesitation and then Vlad proceeded to lift Lance back onto his feet. Dani's jaw nearly dislocated when Vlad began to _brush_ imaginary dust off Lance's suit, murmuring quietly to the human. Lance _smiled_ at Vlad. His shaking gone and all signs of fear nonexistent. The human was completely at ease around the evil ghost! Even more so than when he was around Danny!

"Did I _miss_ something here?" Dani shouted, throwing her arms up in the air.

The adults looked at her in surprise. Vlad gave a long-suffering sigh and whispered something to Lance that caused the human to chuckle. Chuckle!

"What is going on here?" she demanded.

Vlad smiled tolerantly at her—as if he was humoring her. "Relax, Danielle. Everything is fine."

"Everything is _not_ fine!" Dani pointed at Lance then at Vlad, back to Lance, and then to Vlad again. "You—you brainwashed him! You must have! Don't listen to him Mr. Thunder! He's a crazy old guy in desperate need of a cat!"

Vlad and Lance laughed. Cujo rumbled deep in his chest, and Dani found herself agreeing with the sentiment. She felt awfully faint. In fact, she swayed a little on her feet.

Vlad sprung forward, steadying her with a hand on her elbow. His fast movement made Cujo snap his head up and begin growling again. Vlad threw Cujo a quick glare and a very quiet, "Oh, hush!" before giving Dani a concerned look. _Ha!_

"Are you alright, my dear?" he asked her just loud enough, she suspected, for the camera and Lance to hear.

Dani wrenched her arm out of Vlad's grip, giving him a hateful look. "Fine, Frootloop." She didn't care if the camera heard her or not. The creep was obviously in the middle of a scheme, and Dani was done with his evil plots.

Vlad sighed and pinched the bridge of his nose. He looked over his shoulder at Lance. "Would you give us a minute, Lance?"

Dani felt like screaming. _They're on a first name basis?_

Lance looked uncertainly at Cujo, but he nodded. He walked a few steps away—far enough away to give them some privacy but close enough to still be protected. The weatherman turned the camera around and began speaking to the lens.

Dani poked Vlad in the chest, drawing his attention back to her. "Alright, what are you trying to pull, Plasmius? There's no way you could have gotten that man's trust in just ten minutes." Her eyes narrowed in suspicion. "What did you do?"

Vlad rolled his eyes—or seemed to. It's hard to tell without pupils. "Daniel always assumed the worst of me too..."

Dani's hands fisted at her sides. "I'm not Danny. Answer the question!"

"I merely told Lance I was Daniel's father."

"YOU WH—" Vlad clapped a hand over her mouth, muffling her screech of disbelief. Cujo growled a warning, but both half ghosts ignored him.

"Quiet!" Vlad hissed.

"Whu shud uih?" Dani knocked Vlad's hand away from her mouth. "Why should I? Danny's going to be _furious_ when he finds out! Now I have to—"

"Daniel will never know and you don't have to do anything." Vlad wiped his hand against his dress pants, making a face. "Spitting when you talk is very unbecoming, young lady."

Dani sneered at him. "'He'll never know?' I knew you were crazy, Vlad, but this is taking things a bit far, don't you think? How do you expect to keep it from him, exactly?"

Vlad smiled. "With your help, of course."

Dani sputtered, but in the end, there was only one way to respond. "…Frootloop!"

Vlad pursed his lips, but allowed the hated nickname to pass…for the moment. "Daniel and I have many enemies in the Ghost Zone—enemies who wouldn't think twice about revealing our secret to national television. With Daniel occupied at the moment, the camera is left wide open for any ghost to come and cause trouble for us all—including you."

"So?" Dani asked. "I can protect Mr. Thunder all by myself. I've gotten stronger since Danny stabilized me, you know!"

Vlad smiled patronizingly at her. "Strength has no standing today, girl. Protecting Lance will take a silver tongue and the ability to manipulate conversation. Daniel has already said too much, and if I leave you two with this responsibility, we'll be exposed by tomorrow!"

Dani crossed her arms and scowled up at the man. She hated to admit it, but he was right. Protecting their secret will be a battle of words, not strength…and she and Danny weren't very good at that kind of battle. "Alright, so we could use your help. But why tell everyone you're Danny's father?"

"Well, my dear, in case you haven't noticed, I'm not a very trustworthy looking ghost."

Dani rolled her eyes. "Oh, I noticed."

Vlad sighed in a long-suffering way. "I needed to earn the weatherman's trust, and in order to do that, I had to fabricate a connection between young Daniel and myself."

"And you couldn't just say you were his uncle because…?"

Vlad smiled viciously, his fangs flashing. "If I'm going to lie, I might as well make it interesting."

Dani frowned, chewing on her lip. She glanced at Lance, then back to her 'father'. "Danny's not going to like this."

"Daniel doesn't need to know until _after_ the wedding, when the truce is over."

She tilted her head to the side and smirked. "Meanwhile, all of Amity Park thinks you're his dad, and even if he tries to deny it later, they'll doubt him."

Vlad smirked back at her. "Clever girl."

"However, if he finds out during the wedding and your argument is caught on camera…"

"If Daniel finds out, there won't be an argument, Danielle," Vlad said seriously, "there will be a fight." He gave her a considering look. "You don't want to tarnish his reputation in front of Amity Park by informing him of my deception before the truce is lifted, do you?"

Dani gaped at him, disbelief written across her face.

He smirked. "Can I rely on your assistance once more, my girl?"

Dani looked down at his offered hand, chewing her lip uncertainly.

* * *

Valerie was confused. And with Lance droning on about donations—so they could hire an actual full-time ghost reporter, please, please, please donate—and other boring concerns, she had the chance to sort her thoughts without worrying about missing valuable information. She glanced at her father and pouted. It would be a lot easier if she could write her thoughts down…

Damien placed his hands on his knees and stood up. Valerie raised an eyebrow, earning a soft chuckle from her father. "I'll be right back with some snacks. I'm starving! I don't know how you teenagers do it!" He walked into the kitchen, humming a tune to himself.

Valerie watched him go. When he rounded the corner, she leaped for her pad and pencil and began scribbling notes so fast the words were barely legible.

'_Vlad Plasmius, aka, Vlad Masters claims to be Danny Phantom's father. As unbelievable as that sounds, I can't dismiss this information without first considering the facts. _

_Fact 1: Phantom hates Plasmius—but if Vlad is to be believed, the hatred is only one-sided and a result of Phantom's unwillingness to accept Vlad as his father—Vlad didn't comment on why, however._

_Fact 2: Phantom has white hair—Vlad Masters has white hair. Is Phantom's hair color a result of becoming a ghost, or was it inherited? _

_Fact 3: Danny (Fenton) said Masters was in love with his mom, and after seeing Masters' attempts at flirting, I'd have to agree. So what about Phantom's mother? Did he truly love her? Or was Phantom's mother a fling, a fling that created Phantom on accident, and the reason for Phantom's hatred towards Vlad?'_

That theory made Valerie almost pity the ghost, so she quickly moved on.

'_Fact 4: For some reason, Vlad gained Lance's trust just by stating he was Phantom's father. Was this what Vlad intended all along?_

_Fact 5: Ghosts lie. All the time. Masters lied to me for two years. Can I really believe him now?_

_Fact 6: If Vlad is Phantom's father, then Dani is his niece! He wanted me to kill his niece!_

…_Fact 7: Vlad is half ghost half human…Dani Phantom, Danny Phantom's cousin, is half ghost…Is being half ghost a family trai—'_

"Alright!" Damien said loudly, stepping into the living room again. Valerie snapped her notebook shut and all but threw it back onto the coffee table. "I brought chips, popcorn, and some refreshments!"

He tossed a can of soda at Valerie—who's sharp reflexes allowed her to catch the can in midair easily—and took the bag of chips out from underneath his armpit. Damien set the bowl of popcorn on the coffee table and sat down on the couch, ignoring the creaked protest from the worn furniture. He opened the bag of chips and inhaled the smell, smiling in appreciation.

Valerie leaned over and peered at the flavor. "Lime and vinegar?" She wrinkled her nose, but not in disgust. Danny loved the flavor, and after much persuasion and cute though clumsy antics, Valerie had become addicted to them as well. She hadn't had any in a while, though…

Her dad ate a chip. "Ummhmm. You wouldn't think they would taste good, but they're surprisingly addictive. Want some?" He offered the bag to her, smiling gently, and if she didn't know any better, she'd swear there was a knowing glint in his eyes.

Valerie frowned, but hesitantly reached a hand into the bag and pulled a chip out. She ate the sour-yet-sweet tasting chip and couldn't help smiling. Damien had liked Danny—mostly because Valerie had considered giving up ghost hunting for the boy. And now, eating the chips that had been Danny's favorite, she remembered what that had felt like…

She pulled another chip from the bag, and in the act of raising it to her lips, she glanced at the TV to see if there was any change. She dropped her jaw and her chip, staring at the screen in surprise.

Damien frowned at her. "Valerie?" He followed her gaze to the television and felt his own eyes widen slightly.

Danny Phantom was running out of Lady Hairdresser's workroom, a mischievous grin on his face. A black jacket was clutched in one hand and a green tie in the other. Lady Hairdresser could be heard yelling in the background, but despite her sergeant lungs, her words were indecipherable.

Phantom spun to a stop and yelled back, _"Thanks for your help, Lady Hairdresser! It's been a pleasure!"_

The door slammed shut in response.

Phantom, chuckling, turned back around, presenting to the camera what had stunned Damien and Valerie into silence.

Phantom had apparently been in a big hurry to get out of Lady Hairdresser's care, because not only was he still slightly wet, he was also nearly half dressed. He had the white undershirt of a tuxedo on, yes, but it was unbuttoned at the moment.

Phantom's muscles were in full display for the camera again, and as if just realizing this fact, the Ghost Boy blushed and quickly pushed the jacket and tie into the crook of an elbow and began doing up the buttons. His fingers were gloveless and sure; fastening the buttons with the confidence a jumpsuit-wearing ghost had no right to.

If Valerie were a lesser girl, she'd probably be drooling. As a hunter, she could not allow her prey to distract her! She was unable to stop the blush, however, and her father began to glare at the teenage ghost hero.

"_Uh, sorry," _Phantom said, glancing shyly at the camera as his fingers worked. _"I was in a bit of a hurry."_

"_It's no problem, Mr. Phantom," _Lance assured, a hint of amusement in his voice. _"I'm sure no one is complaining."_

Phantom's cheeks grew redder. He finished the last button and didn't waste any time in slipping on the jacket. The black jacket had silver linings and cuffs that matched his old jumpsuits coloring. A white rose adorned the pocket. He hooked the green tie under the white shirt's collar, but left it to dangle untied. Finally, he scrubbed his hands through his damp white hair, messing it into its usual disarrayed style.

Valerie rolled her eyes. _Ever heard of a comb, Phantom? _

The Ghost Boy sighed and allowed his hands to drop to his side. He began looking around the room. _"Hey, where's—"_ He cut himself off. His green eyes narrowed on Vlad and his hands fisted at his side.

"_Plasmius,"_ he acknowledged, sounding like he had just tasted something sour.

"_Ah, yes,"_ Vlad said, seeming to roll his eyes, _"the infamous one word greeting. It's nice to see you as well, my boy."_

Phantom glared at him. _"What are you doing here?"_

"_Same as you, I imagine."_ He sighed, giving Phantom a disappointed look. _"Really, Daniel. You can't tell me you weren't expecting me."_

Danny bristled. _"I _meant_ what are you doing _here_?"_ He pointed at the ground to emphasize his point. _"In this room. You obviously don't need a new outfit."_ He gestured at Vlad's white suit. _"And by the way, white's not your color." _He snickered. _"And a cape? Seriously?"_

Vlad's look turned pleading. _"Can't you at least try to be civil?"_

Danny wore a faux-thoughtful look. _"Hmm…No."_

Vlad's expression hardened. _"That's too bad, Daniel. We both have something to lose tonight, and if you insist on continuing this childish behavior, I suggest you leave Lance here in my custody, where someone _mature_ can watch over him." _

Phantom's eyes flashed with unnatural light and he unconsciously began to shift into a fighting stance. He opened his mouth to respond—something witty, no doubt—but loud barking proceeded by a flying green blur beat him to it. Cujo, dormant until Phantom showed signs of fighting, had tackled Vlad and was now standing on his shoulders, pinning him with his weight. He growled into Vlad's stunned face, his jowls dripping with saliva.

"_Cujo!"_ Phantom cried, snapping out of his stance. Dani quickly began pulling on Cujo's collar, but the large dog was unfazed by the little girl's efforts.

Drool dripped onto Vlad's face and snapped the ghost out of his stupor. _"Get your mangy mutt off me before I vaporize him, Daniel!"_ he ordered, sounding completely serious.

Phantom seemed to believe him. _"No, Cujo! Heal! Sit!"_ He rushed forward and tugged on Cujo's collar. The phantom cousins' combined efforts managed to pull the dog off of Vlad, but Cujo kept snarling and snapping at the older ghost, struggling against their hold.

Phantom placed himself between the ghost and his dog, pushing against his chest. _"Whoa there, boy!" _he said gently but firmly. _"It's alright! He's not worth it. We'll let him off the hook for now." _Cujo growls gradually lessened. Phantom reached an arm up and began rubbing and scratching his ears. _"Yeah, there's a good boy." _

The teen hero continued to spew nonsense until the ghost dog was leaning into his touch. The dog 'popped' into his puppy form and barked up at Phantom, wagging his tail. Phantom gave him a small smile and picked him up. He buried his face in his ghost puppy's fur and Cujo licked his ear.

Valerie thought about making a remark about how the dog was _clearly_ his, but found she didn't really have the motivation at the moment. The scene between a boy and his dog—no matter how weird—just made the whole thing seem bittersweet.

Vlad had picked himself up by now, and was dusting his suit off. _"Obedience school would do you both some good,"_ he remarked quietly to himself.

Phantom glared at him, but continued petting Cujo rather than respond.

Vlad sighed. _"Son, I—"_

Phantom tensed, his grip on Cujo tightening. _"Don't call me your son,"_ he snapped.

The camera jerked. _"Why…can't he call you his son?"_ Lance asked, sounding hesitant.

Frankly, Valerie was surprised the weatherman hadn't run off when Cujo went ballistic. The camera shook, but Lance continued to film. _He must be really dedicated to his job…_

Phantom raised an eyebrow at him, as if he couldn't believe he was asking that. _"Because he—"_

"_Danny!"_ Dani suddenly shouted, gaining everyone's attention. She blushed. "_Uh, um, w-we should really get going! The wedding will be starting soon."_

"_But what about the others?"_

Dani rolled her eyes. _"They'll be fine on their own. Now let's go! I want some cake already!"_

She grabbed her cousin's hand and began dragging him out of the room. Lance pointed the camera at Vlad, capturing the ghost's satisfied smirk.

Valerie bit her lip. She knew Vlad was up to something. But it wasn't her problem. She was just watching for juicy tidbits on her enemies.

* * *

_...**I probably could have done a better job...it feels rushed to me...Although I did do it in under a week, which I haven't done in a long time...**_

**I know some of you were excited to see Danny blow up on Vlad, but come on! Our favorite villian isn't going to jump into one of his schemes without some kind of plan! He didn't have a lot of time to plan it, hence him being forced to put his trust in Dani again. It's really the only real plot this story has, so tell me if it sounds believable. **

**As for why Lance trusts Vlad more than Danny-it's an adult thing I think. Lance would feel more comfortable around another adult rather than a scrawny teenager-no matter how heroic the teen may be.**

**I'll describe the suits better when I write the POV of someone who cares about appearances-probably Paulina. I guess Valerie would have too, but I couldn't fit the description in.**

**And I got fanart! So cool! **

**Dani's dress: sry005. deviantart. com / art / Dani-in-Ghost-Zone-Experience-174714323**

**Danny in a tux: sry005. deviantart. com / art / Danny-in-Ghost-Zone-Experience-174715463 (I almost used this design, but decided not to when I began writing the scene where Danny comes out of the dress-up room.)**

**I wanted to leave a comment on Deviant Art, but I'm having trouble getting an account...So I task those of you who have an account to do so for me! ...Pretty Please?**

**Lol, okay, that's enough.**

**Thanks for reading! It wasn't the best of chapters, but it did its purpose.**

_**...Urgh, now I have to pack...**_


	9. Treading Carefully

**Sorry for the long wait, guys, but you all are probably used to it by now, huh? -_- ****Anyway, sorry. I hope this chapter will make up for it :)**

**I was mostly trying to practice my Danny&Vlad interactions, and they're really hard to do (for me anyway), so I had a lot of trouble in the beginning. It was a lot easier near the end. I hope it wasn't too bad. Their relationship is really complicated T.T**

**Alright, I'm going to try this replying to reviews thing again. Turns out there's a special little button inside the review I'm supposed to push when I reply *Humms* I only got to a few of you last time. I'm VERY sorry, guys. If you take the time to review this story, I should take the time to reply. It's only fair (and I'm a stickler for Karma) I could go back and reply now...Hmms...Anyway! Thank you guys so much! I'm over 300 reviews! That's so amazing :D**

**Thanks to dragondancer123 for betaing! I don't own Danny Phantom or its characters. **

* * *

Chapter 9  
Treading Carefully

Danny's arms tightened around Cujo in an effort to keep himself from strangling Plasmius. Vlad, either oblivious or enjoying Danny's torture, walked right beside the boy. Occasionally he would put a hand on Danny's shoulder or smile warmly down at him as he answered all of Lance's questions with his honey-drenched voice.

Danny retaliated as best he could. He stomped on Vlad's foot whenever it came within range, made witty remarks about Vlad's pitifully lonely afterlife, and (when all else failed) plain out ignored him. Unfortunately, Vlad laughed off each stab at his social life, he shot a jolt of electricity through Danny's shoulder for each successful stomp, and kept directing attention towards Danny. Vlad would either force him to answer half of Lance's questions or ask for Danny's opinion on a subject.

At first Danny thought he was deliberately trying to make him miserable. He was doing a hell of a job at it, but then…

"How often do you visit the Ghost Zone?" Lance asked. He was walking backwards so he could film them more easily, and Danny was sure he was going to trip or run into a wall any second.

Vlad stroked his goatee with one finger—Danny and Dani snickered at his 'thinking' pose—before shrugging. "About twice a day, give or take. There is nothing quite like home, after all." He placed his hand on Danny's shoulder. "You visit the Ghost Zone often as well, don't you, my boy?"

Danny scowled at the hand on his shoulder. "No."

"Why is that?" Lance questioned.

"I don't usually have the time."

Vlad sighed forlornly. "Unfortunate, but true. Fighting off ghosts usually takes away most of his free time."

"No, it doesn't." Danny shook his hand off his shoulder. "And don't pretend as if you know what my life is like."

Vlad gave him a stern look, but before he could say anything, Lance asked, "If not ghost fighting, then what consumes your time?"

Danny stumbled right into that one. He frantically grasped for an answer, since schoolwork was out of the question. "Um, I, uh…"

"Being a teenager," Vlad said instead. "I check in on him from time to time—his well-being is very important to me, after all—and often times find him 'hanging' with his friends, attempting some foolish act to impress them. But there are times I'll find him studying from his friends' school notes." He smiled warmly down at Danny. "Shocking, I know, but to see him studying outside of school makes me very proud."

Danny ground his teeth together and muttered a quiet, "Stalker…"

Lance then went on to ask Dani about how she spends her day. Vlad took the opportunity to lean down and whisper in Danny's ear, "It's a great deal like chess, my boy. You must know what the reporter is likely to ask before you give him an answer, otherwise, you'll wind up with a question you would rather not answer."

Danny blew air through his clenched teeth and pulled away from the man. "I don't need lessons from a cheese-head."

Vlad hummed. "Oh yes, clearly, what _was_ I thinking?" Vlad stood up straight and smiled eloquently at Lance, answering a question about his opinion of cats with ease.

Danny huffed and Cujo rumbled agreement. See? Even _now_ Vlad was trying to mold him into his image of a perfect son. _Frootloop._

Danielle didn't seem comfortable around Vlad either, though she seemed conflicted more than anything else. She stumbled every now and then, and when Lance asked her a question, Danny elbowed her to get her to pay attention to the reporter. If Danny's mind wasn't so focused on keeping himself relatively calm, he might have been more worried about her.

Lance placed a hand against his ear and scrunched his nose slightly. Danny had come to recognize it as the look the reporter got whenever he was asked to do something he didn't like—and that usually meant Danny wouldn't like it either.

"Mr. Phantom?"

Danny tried not to flinch. _Here it comes…_

"What is your opinion of Vlad?"

Danielle drew in a deep breath, but Vlad remained convincingly impassive.

Danny, however, raised an eyebrow. "That's it? I mean, isn't it obvious?"

Lance shook his head slowly. "Many eyewitnesses claim to have seen you two fighting above Amity Park on occasion, and in light of some new information, viewers are curious about your apparent animosity towards each other."

Danny frowned. "New information?"

Dani laughed, and her voice sounded a little strained. "They, uh, just…disagree about a few things. That's all!"

"It's more than just a _few_," Danny protested.

"What are these disagreements?" Lance questioned.

"There are a lot of them, but it really all adds up to the fact that Plasmius is a lonely psychotic crazy person—or a frootloop for short."

"_Thank_ you, Daniel," Vlad said dryly. "You are most kind."

"But hey, ladies." Danny beamed at the camera. "He's _single_. Never would have guessed, right?"

"Daniel!"

Danny smiled innocently up at him. "I'm just trying to help you get over Mom." He turned back to Lance. "I suggested he get a lonely guy cat and try internet dating once. He yelled he would _never_ get a cat—he has one now, by the way—and I'm pretty sure he ignored me about the internet dating."

Vlad glared at him.

Lance cleared his throat. "Can you get an internet connection in h-h-here?"

Danny tilted his head to the side, frowning. "There are no satellites, so I don't think so…"

Vlad grinned, displaying his fangs. "It's a little difficult, but not impossible for a ghost to hack into the internet from inside the Ghost Zone. Be careful about what you say or do on the World Wide Web, children, you never know who is on the other end."

Danny made a disgusted noise and rolled his eyes. "You're always looking for opportunities to make yourself look good, aren't you?" he whispered.

"It's survival, Daniel. The world is a cruel place, and to make it in that world, you must sacrifice a little truth to get what you want."

Danny scowled and put more space between them.

Lance tried to slow his pace so he could hear what the two were saying. "Do you illegally access the internet, Vlad?"

"What?" Vlad's expression made even Danny think the older ghost was offended. "Of course not."

"He lives in the human world like I do," Danny explained. "It's one of those disagreements we have."

"Yes," Lance said thoughtfully, a finger pressing his ear piece. "Mr. Phantom mentioned you two shared your…your territory."

Danny raised an eyebrow. "I did? I don't remember that…"

"Skulker was actually the one to mention it," Vlad said, and Danny had a feeling he was rolling his eyes. "As I recall, you were clinging to a tree at the time."

"Now _that_ I remember."

Dani giggled. "You were clinging to a tree?"

Danny crossed his arms with a slight pout. "Skulker and the others cornered me against a tree when they were trying to drag me here." Dani giggled again. Danny stuck his tongue out at her.

Beside him, Vlad chuckled. "It was quite entertaining to watch. After all, it's not every day you see a 'hero' in such a position."

Danny wrinkled his nose and narrowed his eyes. "You recorded it?"

"Naturally."

"You realize that means I'll have to destroy your copy, right?"

"You're far too modest about your fame, my boy." Vlad smirked and Danny got a very bad feeling he was going to regret ever laying eyes on that tree. "By all means, you can destroy my copy—the _internet_, after all, is _forever_."

Danny's shoulders slumped. He weakly glared up at his archenemy. "I hate you."

"I'm well aware of your feelings." In fact, Vlad was _grinning_.

Danny snorted. "Frootloop."

Vlad was walking inside Danny's bubble space again, so Danny stepped on his foot. Plasmius flinched in surprise, and by the way his eyes narrowed, Danny knew he was already planning his revenge. The younger smirked in satisfaction. _Bring it on, frootloop. _

"How did the two of you come to exist in Amity Park together?" Lance asked.

Danny blushed, thinking of some of the embarrassing pranks he'd been put through—and had dished out. "A prank war."

Lance looked taken aback. "A…_prank_ war?"

"Yup."

Lance turned to Vlad for confirmation.

Vlad's own cheeks were a suspicious purple color, but otherwise he didn't seem too embarrassed. "I'm afraid so, Lance. However—and forgive me for sounding like a child—_he_ started the whole fiasco."

Danny jerked his head around. "Maybe so, but you were _so_ asking for it, Plasmius!"

Vlad glanced at the camera and warned, "This is neither the time nor the place for that argument, Daniel."

Danny stepped between Lance and Vlad, forcing the older ghost to a stop. "I don't care. You deserved everything you got, Plasmius—times ten!"

"Oh?" Vlad questioned, finally allowing his polite mask to slip and a sneer to take its place. "I'm afraid I don't quite understand your reasoning, could you please explain it to me?"

Danny glared harshly at him. "You destroyed my room_._"

"Yes, but only _after _you destroyed my house." He chuckled mockingly. "If that's the best you can do—"

"I'm not done, Plasmius." Danny began listing things off his fingers. "You also kidnapped me, spied on me, gave my friends a deadly disease, stranded me and my mom in the middle of absolutely _nowhere_, placed a _bounty_ on my head, and—and—urgh!" He threw one of his arms out, nearly hitting Dani in the head. "And a _million_ other things I can't think of right now! You are just one seriously crazed-up frootloop, Plasmius!"

Cujo growled at Vlad, his puppy body beginning to glow.

"Oh wow…" Lance murmured.

"You haven't exactly been a saint either, Daniel," Vlad growled. Where Danny's voice had been loud and angry, Vlad's was quiet and dangerous. He stepped towards Danny, looming over him by six inches. Danny, not wanting to appear weak and back down, stood in place and craned his head back to glare into Plasmius's red eyes. "My actions may have been extreme, but my intentions were pure."

"_Pure_?" Danny scoffed. "You want to kill my dad!"

Vlad's eyes flashed. "That buffoon doesn't deserve you or your mother!"

"Oh and you think you do?"

"Yes!"

Danny rolled his eyes and snorted softly through his nose.

Vlad growled low in his throat. "All I have ever wanted from you and your mother was love, but all I have received from you is derision and loathing. You mock me, you humiliate me, you do everything within your power to show your absolute _disdain_ for me." He took another step forward and Danny stumbled backwards in surprise. "Yet I keep trying. Isn't that love?"

Danny bared his teeth, and in his arms, Cujo mirrored him. "No, that's obsession. If you truly _loved_ us, Plasmius, you would want us to be happy."

Vlad scoffed, his pupil-less eyes rolling up towards the ceiling. "Oh please. Tell me, little badger, what would _you_ do if the people you loved hated you with every _fiber_ of their being?"

An image of Valerie flashed through Danny's mind. His mouth snapped shut and his eyes lowered so he was no longer looking at the man's face. "I do love someone who hates me, Plasmius, and I _do_ want her to be happy. Even if it means I'm out of the picture."

Vlad faltered. He considered Danny's bowed head, fisted palms, and the bittersweet smile that trembled only slightly. A minute passed before his sighed and bowed his own head. "Perhaps you do, little badger."

Danielle walked over to Lance and tapped his shoulder. The weatherman looked down, his jaw still hanging and his eyes the size of golf balls. Dani grinned and said brightly, "No worries, Mr. Thunder. This is normal for them."

If possible, Lance looked even more stunned.

* * *

Tucker tossed a piece of popcorn into the air. It came back down, not into his waiting mouth, but onto his glasses. Tucker pursed his lips and tossed another piece into the air. Sam reached out a hand and snagged it inches from Tucker's mouth.

"Hey!" Tucker gave his friend a dark look. "I almost caught that!"

Sam returned his dark look with one of her own. "How can you be so casual about this? Vlad just told everyone that he was Danny's father! And Danielle's going along with it!"

Tucker shrugged. "Well, what do you expect me to do? It's not like we can warn him or anything." He returned his attention to the television, occasionally stuffing popcorn into his mouth. On the screen, Danny stepped on Vlad's foot and Plasmius flinched before shocking Danny's shoulder. Tucker smirked.

Sam jumped off the couch and began pacing in front of the TV. "But there has to be _something_ we can do." She walked to the left and Tucker dove to the right, trying to keep the TV in view. "Cell phones don't work inside the Zone, but the Fenton Phones do!" She spun around and walked in front of the TV again.

Tucker quickly leaned to the left.

"Urgh, but Danny didn't think to grab one." She paused right in Tucker's way.

Tucker grumbled and sat up straight.

"We can't go in after him, because, even if we found some way to travel inside there, we might blow his secret." She began pacing again. "Maybe we could—"

"Sam!" Tucker finally shouted. "There is nothing we can do, alright? It's up to Danny to figure Vlad out, keep his secret a secret, and—"

_Riiiiiiing!_

"Dang it!" Tucker hit the couch. "Why can't I ever rant?"

Sam rolled her eyes and reached for the hotel phone. "Hello?"

**"There is a phone call for Samantha Manson,"** the hotel secretary said.

"Just Sam, please."

**"****Uh, yes, ma'am. A Jasmine Fenton is calling—she says it's important. I know your parents said no calls, but she sounded so urge—**"

"It's alright. Just put her through."

The phone clicked and then Jazz's voice flowed through the speaker. **"Hello? Sam?"**

Sam rolled her eyes. "No, it's the Grim Reaper. Seriously, Jazz, you called _me_, remember?"

Tucker drank from his soda. "She was probably afraid you were your mom."

Sam glared at him. "I do _not_ sound like that happy hippy."

**"Actually, over the phone, you do."**

Sam muttered darkly to herself.

**"****Anyway, Danny is on TV ****_right now_!"**

"I know, Jazz," Sam said with a quiet sigh. "I'm watching him yell at Vlad…Wait! How do you know about it? I thought you were at the ghost convention with your parents?"

**"Yeah, the ghost convention. As soon as the ghost fanatics heard about the show, their unhealthy obsessions took over and they somehow managed to build a TV projector out of a tarp, a laptop, and my cell phone." **Jazz sounded exasperated. **"I still can't believe I was the only one to bring a cell phone…How are you watching it?"**

Sam shrugged. "We're only a few hours out of Amity Park, so we're still receiving their broadcast. My parents get car sick easily, so we're taking a 'brief rest' at an expensive hotel." She shook her head. "Mom and Dad are relaxing by the pool so Tucker and I have the TV to ourselves."

"We might have a bit of a problem once they come back up, though," Tucker pointed out, still eating his popcorn. "I don't think they'd approve of that—" Tucker pointed a buttery finger at the screen where Danny was practically spitting in Vlad's face.

Sam sighed and rubbed her forehead. "Danny is so going to break the truce…"

**"We shouldn't count him out just yet,"** Jazz said, trying to sound optimistic. **"His self-control has gotten a lot better over the years. I wish there was some way we could help him, though…"**

Sam stood up and began pacing in front of the TV again. She and Jazz began bouncing ideas and plans off each other with little actual success. Tucker grumbled, wishing the phone wasn't cordless.

He tuned them out and focused on the TV instead. Danny had just mentioned he loved someone who hated him, and Tucker was sure that someone was Valerie. He had assumed Danny was over her, but apparently that wasn't completely true.

_Good thing Sam wasn't paying attention, _he thought, throwing a glance at Sam.

**"I could use my parent's ecto-bazooka thing to create a portal and then send the boooomerang through with a message."**

"Your parents might see it hit him, though. And as far as they know, it only targets Danny _Fenton_. We'd be blowing his secret for him. What if we…"

Tucker rolled his eyes.

"_No worries, Mr. Thunder," _Danielle said, smiling brightly. _"This is normal for them."_

Tucker chuckled. _I knew I liked her._

Sam suddenly fell back into the couch. "I just feel so useless! I don't like it."

**"I don't either, Sam, but I don't think there's anything we can do for Danny. Not directly, anyway."**

Sam sat forward. "What about indirectly?"

**"Well, with all these half answers Danny is giving everyone, wild ideas and theories are bound to start coming out—my parents are already going crazy! What wecan do is lead them off the trail. We can make wild assumptions of our own, or maybe even tell the truth—but make it sound so preposterous, no one would believe it!"**

Sam frowned. "Is that really all we can do?"

**"For now."**

Sam sighed. "Yeah, alright. Talk to you later, Jazz." She placed the phone back into its cradle before leaning back into the couch, looking put out with her arms crossed.

Tucker grinned at her. "I told you so," he said.

Sam glared at him. "Don't talk with your mouth full, Tucker."

"Yes, happy hippy mommy—Ow!" He rubbed his sore shoulder and glared at her.

"You deserved it," she said simply.

* * *

Lance carefully placed one foot behind the other, walking steadily backwards. The Hall of the Ghost King was silent. The torches and armored knights set the scene squarely in the middle ages and resurrected all of Lance's old nightmares. He consistently kept himself at least five paces away from the four ghosts following him down that unsettling hallway.

It wasn't that he was _terrified_ of them. Danny Phantom, after all, was a proven hero. He protected humans and had even assured Lance right to his face that he wouldn't let anything bad happen to him. Danielle Phantom was merely a child and appeared to be sweet and innocent—though she was just as quick with the quips as her cousin. Vlad Plasmius, though certainly scary-looking, spoke the language of the reporters-spoke Lance's language. He was Danny's father, Danielle's uncle, and didn't seem inclined to hurt Lance. The…dog, Cujo, was terrifying, but Danny had him under control at the moment, so Lance had no reason to be so scared.

But scared he was. Scared that his boss was going to make him ask that one question that would set these ghosts over the edge and get him killed.

Just look at what his last question had done! Father and son had started arguing out of practically no where! When they had finished not two minutes later, the whole group had sunk into a kind of silent bubble that Lance was afraid to pop for fear of unleashing these ghosts' fury.

For five minutes or so, no one said anything. Vlad glanced at Danny once and a while and Danny stared at his feet where Cujo scampered. Danielle quietly walked between the two older ghosts and Lance stubbornly ignored his boss.

"_Lance!" _she shouted right into the microphone. _"What are you doing? Ask questions! Get them talking! This is _boring_—and no one likes boring! Especially _me_!"_

Lance wondered how much trouble he would get in if he made a break for the Specter Speeder.

"_Lance, come _on_! Phantom mentioned he likes someone who hates him—get on it! Ask more about this girl! Is she human? How old is she? Why does she hate him? What does she look like? Lance!" _

Lance sighed. Dani heard and flashed him a quick smile, apparently trying to cheer him up.

"_Alright, how about this, Lance. If you don't start asking questions this second, I'll make you the official ghost reporter and give your weather job to Tiffany Snow."_

Lance gasped and almost dropped the camera. _She wouldn't…_

"_Don't test me, Lance. This story is _huge_, and if you ruin it for the company, you _will_ regret it."_

"Mr. Phantom!"

Lance's shout echoed off the walls and Danny's head shot up. His eyes darted around quickly, but when no hostile ghost appeared, they focused on Lance, his expression confused. "What's the matter?" His family was also giving him strange looks.

Lance wheezed out a laugh. "I, uh, you—" He took a deep breath. "Y-you mentioned you loved someone who h-hated you." Danny's cheeks began to take on a rosy hue. "W-who is this girl?"

Danny sputtered. "Th-that was a private conversation!"

Danielle laughed openly. "The ghosts back in the _dressing room_ heard it, cuz."

Danny flinched. "Oh…" He shook his head. "Well, I can't say who she is."

Sweat began to break out upon Lance's forehead. "What? Why not?"

The ghost glanced at the camera in his hands and then quickly looked away. "Because she is most likely watching at this very moment, and I don't want her to know."

"She doesn't know that you like her?"

"No, and I plan to keep it that way."

"_Find out more about this girl, Lance!"_

_But—but!_

"_Ladies and gentlemen, our new ghost reporter: Lance—"_

"Is she human?" Lance shouted.

Danny frowned. "I—"

"Of course she's human, she's watching the show! Why does she hate you?"

Danny crossed his arms. "Are you even—"

"How old is she?"

"Mr. Thunder, I—"

"She's sixteen, Mr. Thunder!"

"Danielle!" Danny yelled in dismay.

Dani grinned at him. "Yes, cousin?"

"Does she live in Amity Park?"

"Look I'm not—'

"Yes."

"Dani! Shut up!"

"Does she go to Casper High?"

"Yup."

"Vlad, do something!"

Vlad held up his hands, an amused smirk on his face. "I would rather stay out of it, if you don't mind."

"Does your friend-not-girlfriend know about this other girl?"

"Yes, and she used to get very jealous."

Danny groaned and dropped his head into his hands.

"Used to?"

"Well, Danny is steadily getting over her because, like he said, she hates him."

"Why does she hate him?"

Danny quickly pulled Dani against his chest and clamped a hand over her mouth. "Oh no you don't, blabbermouth!" Dani looked up at him, her eyes crinkled around the edges in a smile.

"What does she look like?" Lance continued, determined not to lose his preferred job.

Danny looked at Lance with an annoyed expression, but then his eyes suddenly widened. "Mr. Thunder, stop—"

"Is she—" Lance, unaware of the wall coming at the end of the hallway, nearly had a heart attack when his momentum carried him straight _through_ it. The ghosts who had sworn to protect him were cut off by the not-so-solid wall and Lance was left gaping and trembling, alone, on the other side.

"W-wh-what?" Lance stuttered. His breathing became erratic, but there was no ghost hero to hand him a paper bag.

"_What just happened, Lance?"_ his boss questioned, somewhere between upset and confused.

"I-I-I don't kn-know!" Lance shouted, inching away from the deceitful wall.

"_Wait, wait! Didn't Phantom say that as a human, you could pass through walls here in the Ghost Zone?"_

Lance's breathing slowed as he recalled that conversation.

"_Well then what are you waiting for? I'm not paying you to film a brick wall! Get back to Danny Phantom!"_

Lance nodded—she didn't have to tell him twice.

A cold, large hand suddenly grasped Lance's shoulder, and Lance's heart almost literally froze. Lance, trembling uncontrollably, slowly turned his head and looked down at the hand on his shoulder. He saw the ice, the naked bone, and heard a gruff voice ask, "What is a puny human doing here?"

Lance Thunder, Amity Park's weatherman, screamed and promptly fainted.

* * *

_I love the ending. Though I suppose you guys don't appreciate the cliffhanger XD_

**Whew! Done! And very excited about the next chapter, which hasn't happened since three or so chapters back O.o **

**Sorry if the fight between Vlad and Danny seemed a little off. It sounded a lot better when I wrote than when I read over it. But that is probably because I changed it so often-and trust me, guys, it's a lot better than the first draft! And for the record, I love Vlad as a character, but I hate writing him! Urgh! *Bangs head on desk***

**Sorry if you're a DxS fan and the DxV hints annoyed you, but variety is healthy for a teenage boy ;D **

**If you have questions you want Lance to ask, just let me know! I'm running out...**

**Another pic! This one is of Ember, Spectra, and Dora, but you'll have to go onto my profile to get the link. Rules are rules, even if you don't understand them.**

**Hope to see you guys again soon!**

**Thanks for reading! Leave a review if it doth please thee.**


	10. The Ghosts

**That wasn't too long of a wait :D It's pretty short and Danny isn't in it, but I hope you all like it just the same!**

**Hey! I think I got all the reviewers this time! Well, I didn't get the anonymous reviewers. I'm not sure how to reply to them...**

**I don't own Danny Phantom. My beta is dragondancer123-and be thankful because without her, Frostbite would be speaking like Yoda ;D**

* * *

Chapter 10  
The Ghosts

Lance felt cold—no, not just cold. Freezing. So freezing cold, it was like sleeping on ice. But although his back was resting against a hard surface, his left side was pressed against something soft and fluffy. Soft was supposed to mean warm…right? Voices flowed all around him, but a voice inside his head spoke the loudest.

"_The camera!" _the voice shrieked. _"You put that down! Lance! Get your lazy butt up and get the camera away from the ghosts!"_

Like magic, that one word brought Lance's mind to focus and snapped his eyes open. "Ghosts?" Memories of the last few minutes before he passed out rushed back to him, and, with great trepidation, Lance glanced at the cold, hard surface supporting his back. Naked bone incased in solid ice and the soft pillow was really snow white fur clothed in strange garments. The cold aura emanating from this body had a sharp, static zap to it. These were the only clues the weatherman of Amity Park needed.

"GHOST!" he screamed at the top of his lungs. He sprang away from the hairy, undead being and rushed to his feet.

He didn't run far, though. Two hairy yeti-like ghosts stood between him and the wall he had walked through moments before. He stopped his headlong rush two inches from these ghosts, close enough to smell their rancid breath. Lance stared wide-eyed at their fangs—bared in annoyance—for five seconds before screaming and running in a different direction. But there were ghosts that way too. He spun around. More ghosts. All around him—ghosts. Yeti ghosts, a ghost without a face, a ghost woman with red horned hair and hungry eyes, dinosaur ghosts, ghosts in masks. Ghosts of every shape and size. All of them surrounding him—trapping him.

Numerous pairs of glowing eyes were focused on him, Lance Thunder, and none of them were friendly.

"No!" Lance cried. He fell to his knees and began sobbing pathetically. "I'm too handsome to be eaten!"

"_The camera, Lance! Get the camera!"_

The ghost with the frozen arm stepped toward Lance, looking down at him with a hard gaze. "What are you doing here, human?" it asked gruffly. "The Ghost Zone is no place for the living."

"I-I-I—" Lance stuttered.

"Oh, lighten up, Frosty!" the hungry-eyed woman said with a too-cheerful voice. Her movements were too fast, Lance wasn't prepared for her to suddenly appear at his back. Her cold hands gripped his shoulders like force grips. "Can't you see this poor, insignificant reporter doesn't want to be here?"

Lance's eyes lowered and his shoulders sagged beneath the ghosts hands. No, he didn't want to be there, and he _was_ unimportant. His boss didn't even care her weather reporter was in mortal danger—she just cared about the stupid camera. The ghost woman made a noise like she had just tasted something delicious.

A ghost without a face cocked its head. "He looks familiar." Its voice was nasal and easy to ignore, easy to forget. How did it talk if it didn't have a mouth?

"Yes, but everybody with a face looks familiar to you, sweetie," the ghost woman said sweetly.

The ghost pulled its hat down over its face. "She is feeding off you, human," it said casually. Lance gasped and quickly scrambled away from her.

She growled in outrage. "Why you little—"

"No fighting allowed!" one of the ghosts in masks shouted, brandishing its glowing green baton.

The she-ghost hurriedly held up her hands in a placating motion. "Okay, okay, easy there. We're just exchanging friendly banter." She flashed the faceless ghost a smile. "Right, Amorpho?"

"If you say so, Spectra," Amorpho said without emotion.

"Why don't we give the human to the couple as a wedding present?" a green blob suggested, smiling toothily.

"Why would they want a human?" a yeti ghost asked, genuinely sounding confused.

A mummified ghost answered, "Humans make great slaves."

"Yes," a specter in royal attire added thoughtfully. He fingered a dragon's eye necklace as he considered Lance, a mocking smirk on his blue face. "The Box Ghost can practice on it, and the Lunch Lady can use it as a sampler for all her new recipes. I'm sure her family would appreciate a different victim for her cooking!"

Many of the ghosts began laughing—eerie, evil, echoing laughter. Lance's responding scream caught in his throat. What came out sounded more like a chocked whimper than an actual scream. The ghosts laughed harder.

"_Oh, now it's upside down! Lance, _please_! Get. The. Camera!"_

Lance couldn't care less about the camera at the moment, but it was nice to hear his boss begging _him_ for once. He gathered his courage and began searching for his camera amongst the multitude of evil-looking ghosts. He spotted it in the hands of a ghost he remembered. The ghost was the one that almost shocked Danny Phantom, a little before Lance had been dragged into the Ghost Zone. And at the moment, he was holding the camera upside down and inspecting it like it was the most fascinating thing in the world.

_No way, _Lance thought to himself. _I am not going to antagonize any more ghosts. He can do whatever he wants to the da—_

The ghost began pulling off the built-in fuzz mike.

"Hey!" Lance shouted. He jumped to his feet. "Stop that! You'll break it!"

The ghost started in surprise. He stared at Lance as if the reporter had lost his mind. "I am Technus 2.0! I am the Master of all Technology! I do not 'break'—" The mike popped off the camera with a resounding pop and a spark of electricity. The ghost lifted the mike up to his face. "Gee, I hope that wasn't important…"

"You _broke_ it!" Lance pulled on his gelled hair in horror. "You _idiot_! I can't believe you—" Technus's eyes glowed red behind his sunglasses. "—you, uh, that is to say, I-I-I refuse to believe you _can't_ fix it! I mean you're the-the, um, the, um…M-Master of Technology! Yeah…"

Technus's eyes stopped glowing and he beamed at Lance's praise. Lance sagged in relief. "You are correct! I can fix it _and_ I can make it ten times _better_, because I, Technus, am the Master of all Electronic Beeping Devices!" Technus added in a whisper, "Cameras are just a little more complicated…"

"Uh, that's okay," Lance assured hurriedly. "You don't have to upgrade it. Just—"

"Nonsense!" Technus's hands and the camera started glowing green. The wires inside the camera began moving and rearranging. They reached for the dislocated mike and pulled it towards the transforming camera. There was a bright flash of light that had Lance and the other ghosts covering their eyes.

"Ha!" Technus shouted triumphantly. "It is now the _bomb diggidy_!"

"_Oh wow!" _Lance's boss cried._ "The picture is amazing! And we can hear you again! We should hire him."_

Lance peaked through his fingers. The camera appeared to be far more advanced than before; at least, it was more compact and fancy. But it was also creepier looking, with see-through malevolent red and black covering.

Lance shivered and lowered his hands. "That's gr-great, Technus. Can I have it back now?"

"Have it back?" Technus frowned. "What are you blathering on about? This is mine!"

"Yours?"

"Yes! Mine! I fixed it!"

"You're the one who broke it!"

"I did not break it! It temporarily malfunctioned…"

Lance groaned. "Just give it back!"

Technus hugged the camera to his chest. "Make me!"

Lance's eyes narrowed. "I—"

The royally dressed ghost laughed. "Yes, _make_ Technus give you back your camera."

"Oh, I can't wait to see this!" Spectra said. "A human with absolutely no experience in fighting ghosts, forcing a moderately powerful ghost to give up his possession. This should be entertaining, if rather short."

"Poor human," the green blob said. "It's going to get creamed."

The undead began cackling again.

Lance cringed and took a step back. "I, uh…"

"_Lance! Don't back out now! You were doing so well before!"_

Lance licked his lips nervously. "Uh, i-if you don't give it b-back right now, Te-Technus, D-Danny Phantom will be r-really upset…"

Lance blinked and looked around him. All the ghosts had gone silent at the mention of Danny Phantom's name, and were now staring at Lance with new eyes.

"You are one of Phantom's humans?" the mummified ghost asked. "A human from Amity Park?"

Lance drew himself up. "Yes I am. And if you hurt me, he will…do something you won't like!"

It was quiet for a few, long seconds.

The royally dressed ghost suddenly smiled, displaying his sharpened canines. "But Phantom isn't here right now."

"Oooh!" Spectra chimed in. "That is true! And just imagine how _miserable_ he will be when he arrives and finds one of his precious humans…_gone_." She rubbed her hands together. "I can already taste his misery! He's a wellspring of it you know. It wouldn't be hard."

"You make a valid point, Spectra," the royal ghost said. "The boy stole my crown from me—he deserves to lose his subjects." His pupils became slits and his eyes zeroed in on Lance, his already sharp teeth becoming sharper. "**This one's mine**."

Lance gasped and scrambled backwards until his back collided with a furry front. Two hands grabbed his shoulders, one furry and the other covered in ice. Lance craned his head back and was surprised when 'Frosty' looked down at him with kinder eyes than before. They reminded him of Phantom, despite the difference in color and intensity. It was for this reason Lance's breath hitched, but he didn't scream or run around in circles.

He smiled at him—or seemed to—before glaring harshly at the other ghosts. "The human is under Danny Phantom's protection, and therefore, he is under the Far Frozen's," he stated in a firm voice.

Two more yeti ghosts stepped forward, between Lance and the ghosts who had threatened him. They crossed their burly arms and released low, vibrating growls. Lance heard similar growls behind him, and knew there were more Far Frozen ghosts backing them.

The royal ghost's eyes widened and he took a few steps back. "I meant no disrespect to _you_, Frostbite."

Frostbite grunted. "You disrespect us when you disrespect the Great One, Aragon. Leave."

Aragon nodded hurriedly before he fled into the crowd of ghosts.

Spectra rolled her eyes and put her hands on her hips. "You're such a party-pooper, Frosty. A little despair is _healthy_ for a teenager."

The growls increased in volume.

She sighed. "Alright, fine. Have it your way. But this isn't over." She spun around. "Come on, Bertrand. Let's find something more _exciting_." She walked off with the green blob hurrying after her.

"The camera, Technus," one of the Far Frozen said.

Technus scowled. "Fine. I didn't like it that much anyway." He tossed it to the Far Frozen ghost and flew away. Most of the other ghosts followed his example, leaving Lance and the Far Frozen ghosts alone.

Lance was handed his camera back and he quickly studied it—grimacing at the new design—to make sure it was unharmed. Frostbite released Lance's shoulders and took a few steps back, giving him some much needed space.

The human smiled a little shakily at him. "Uh, thank you for, uh, saving me."

Frostbite waved his iced hand dismissively. "It was my duty as the Great One's humble servant." Lance frowned. Frostbite grunted to himself. "But perhaps it is time you told me why you are in the evil Ghost King's throne room, little human."

Lance gulped. "Th-the throne room?" Waking up to find himself surrounded by hostile ghosts hadn't encouraged Lance to survey his surroundings. He took the chance now to sweep the camera around the large room.

Decorations littered the throne room, but the ghosts didn't use the normal colorful balloons and streamers to decorate a wedding. For the most part, boxes were the prevalent decoration, but there were others.

Instead of torches, the room was lit by floating, eerie orbs of light. Creepy as the different colored orbs were, they gave the room a festive atmosphere. Red, green, pink, yellow, blue, white, all the colors you could imagine. These orbs dipped and twirled in the air as if they had a mind of their own.

The ghosts lurked in groups around food laden tables, randomly placed around the room. Lance wasn't sure if the food was edible for him, but it looked delicious. On each table an ice sculpture was placed. The ice sculptures would either be of a ghost, a large fruit, or (oddly enough) a box.

But a large sarcophagus commanded the most attention. It was placed upon a dais at the far end of the room and had a bright red orb floating steadily above it. Four masked guards stood around the dais, brandishing their weapons when a ghost wondered too close.

"The wedding of the Box Ghost and the Lunch Lady will commence here, yes." Frostbite eyed the reporter. "It is no place for humans, as you can see. Especially today. No portals were due to open, so how is it you are so far inside the Ghost Zone?"

"Well, actually, I came here with Danny Phantom." Lance looked over his shoulder at the wall the behind him. "We got separated when I accidentally fell through that wall…"

Frostbite hummed thoughtfully. "If that is the case, Danny Phantom has already begun searching for you and is likely no longer where you had last seen him. I will send someone to retrieve him. In the meantime, please tell me why the Great One has brought a human to the Ghost Zone at such a dangerous time."

Lance took a deep breath to calm himself and then explained his nightmare.

* * *

Mathew Lancer had always kept his opinion of Danny Phantom strictly neutral.

Whenever he started to admire the Ghost Boy for being brave and heroic, he would remind himself of the early years, when Danny Phantom was known as Inviso-Bill, Public Enemy Number One. Whenever the ghost caused property damage to the school and _smiled_ about it, he would remember the boy who protected his charges from malevolent ghosts. And so on and so forth.

As the vice principal of Casper High, he didn't have time to wonder about a dead teenager's morality—he had enough teens to ponder over, thank you.

But this live news broadcast was seriously starting to put a strain on his neutral stance about the matter. To sort out his thoughts, he had begun making a morality checklist. One side of the paper was labeled 'Hero' and the other: 'Blameworthy'. He had considered adding an 'Innocent' column, believing he should give the boy a chance to explain away his poorer decisions. After a few seconds of thought, however, he decided against it.

A hero's actions should speak louder than his words.

"_I see," _Frostbite the ghost said on the TV screen. _"The Great One is facing the consequences of resisting tradition."_

Lancer hadn't considered it from that angle. With a sigh, he wrote beneath the Blameworthy side: _**Endangers the people he is around.**_

"_Oh, uh," _Thunder's voice stuttered, sounding conflicted. _"I probably shouldn't have been so close…"_

Frostbite shook his furry head. _"Not even the Great One is without faults, Lance Thunder of Amity Park News. Had he obeyed the rules, you would not be here now." _The yeti suddenly traded his serious expression for one less severe. _"But by swearing to protect you, Danny Phantom has taken responsibility for his actions. It is for this reason that we of the Far Frozen consider Danny Phantom to be a true hero."_

"_Because he protects people?"_

"_He is a hero because the people he unintentionally puts in danger he does not abandon. He is responsible and brave, a rare trait in both ghosts and humans."_

Lancer arched an eyebrow. He hummed as he added under Hero: _**Protects those he endangers.**_

"_There are some humans who would disagree with you, Frostbite," _Thunder said. _"They believe Mr. Phantom is evil and is only pretending to be a hero. That he will soon lead an invasion. What would you say to them?"_

Frostbite frowned, and even Lancer scooted back from such a frightening face. _"I would say…Danny Phantom is a very powerful and charismatic individual. He united the Ghost Zone once when the Evil King arose, and I have no doubt of his abilities to unite us again__,__ if the situation were dire enough. But the Great One has proven himself a protector of the human world. He is loyal to humans__,__ and this sense of loyalty and honor is what draws us ghosts to him._

"_Besides." _Frostbite rumbled a chuckle. _"A terrible actor, he is. You would know him for a liar long before two years had passed."_

Lance tapped his pen against his cheek, considering the ghost's words. Under Hero he wrote: _**Loyal to humans. **_Of course, he's basing it on Frostbite's word, but he could always erase it later if the ghost proved to be a liar.

"Why is the abominable snowman calling Danny Phantom 'Great One'?"

"Lord of the Flies!" Lancer jumped like a startled cat. He heard his back crack and was quickly overcome by lumbago—lower back pain. But he at least managed to hold onto his notebook and pen. He bent forward and rubbed his aching back, groaning and moaning in pain.

"Are you alright, Lancer?"

Lancer glared at the little six year old boy sitting beside him on the couch. "What are you doing in my house, Timmy?"

Timmy pouted. "You promised Mom you would watch me today, Lancer, don't you remember?"

Lancer grimaced. He did remember promising to watch his neighbor's son, but that was before the fascinating broadcast came on… "My name is _Mr_. Lancer, Timmy." He very slowly and carefully leaned into the couch. The soft cushions were a blessing on his back. "You can stay, Timmy, but for the love of literature, be _quiet_. I'm watching a _very_ important show."

Timmy looked like he was seconds away from jumping on the couch. "Yeah! Yeah! The show about the Ghost Boy! Me and Mom were watching it before she had to leave for work!"

"Mom and I."

"Huh?"

"Never mind. I believe Mr. Thunder just asked about Frostbite's relation to Danny Phantom, so if you would please..."

"But you haven't answered my question yet!"

"Because I don't know the answer myself!"

"But you know _everything_, Lancer!"

"It's _Mr_. Lancer, Timmy!"

"…_am the Great One's mentor," _Frostbite said on screen.

"See?" Timmy pointed his finger at the TV and bounced on his cushion. "There he goes again!"

"Timmy, shh!"

"_His mentor?" _Thunder questioned

"_Yes. Like the Far Frozen, Danny Phantom has a cold core. He sought—"_

"_A cold core?"_

Frostbite placed his unfrozen hand on his furry chest. _"A ghost's core is comparable to a human's heart, for it is where our essence is located. The type of core varies from ghosts to ghost. Danny Phantom has a frozen core, one that allows him to produce ice attacks and ice structures such as this…" _Frostbite cupped his hands together in front of him. Lancer expected to see a blinding light similar to the one that had happened after the sound was temporarily lost. But the only light was a brief glow above Frostbite's hands that soon became a beautiful ice diamond.

"Whoa!" Timmy exclaimed. He laughed and clapped his hands together. "That's way better than the coin trick that fat clown did at my birthday party!"

_I'm not fat…_ Lancer thought indignantly, rubbing his large belly. _It's bloated muscle._

Frostbite held the diamond up to the camera. _"Without proper guidance, a fully mature core is difficult to control and extremely dangerous. Danny Phantom's core would have consumed him had he not found his way back to the Far Frozen."_

"The Ghost Boy almost…" Timmy gasped and slapped his hands over his mouth, "…_died_?"

Lancer frowned at the boy. "He's a ghost, Timmy. He's already dead."

Timmy's eyes widened. He twisted around and stared at the teacher in horror. "He's _dead_?"

Lancer felt compelled to do what the kids would call a 'palm-face'. _There's something wrong with this town…_

"_But Mr. Phantom's core is stable now?" _Thunder asked.

Frostbite nodded. _"When he puts his mind to it, Danny Phantom is a fast learner. He attained control in under three days." _The ghost hummed thoughtfully. _"His haste likely had more to do with Undergrowth's domination of the human world than my teachings. He was very anxious throughout his training."_

Lancer smiled and wrote beneath Hero: _**He is a fast learner.**_

"What's that?" Timmy asked, pointing to the notebook.

"I'm making a morality checklist on Danny Phantom."

"…A what?"

Lancer sighed. "I'm trying to decide if Phantom is a hero or a bad guy."

Timmy tilted his head to the side. "But I thought everyone thought he was a hero."

Lancer shook his head. "Not everyone. For instance, the Fentons think he can't be trusted."

"But Danny _is_ good!" Timmy cried. He stood on the couch, throwing his arms around for balance and emphasis. "He fights bad ghosts all the time and he saved all those kids from a fire and stopped the bus accident and he even helped me place the star on my Christmas tree!"

"Timmy! Get your feet off the couch! Your shoes are still on!"

Timmy stuck his tongue out at Lancer. The teacher's eyes narrowed dangerously and the kid quickly plopped back down on the cushions. He pouted and crossed his arms unhappily. "He _is_ a hero, Lancer."

"_Mr_. Lancer, Timmy." Lancer paused. He added thoughtfully, almost absently, "You know, Danny Phantom always refers to Lance Thunder as _Mr_. Thunder…"

Timmy blinked and his mouth formed a silent 'O'.

Lancer gave himself a mental pat on the back. Hero: _**He is a good role model.**_

"_Why do you call Danny Phantom Great One?" _Thunder questioned next.

"Finally!" Timmy cried.

Frostbite scratched at the base of his ice horns. _"Because he defeated the evil Ghost King, Pariah Dark. Do humans not honor him with such a title?"_

"…_Well, we stopped calling him Inviso-Bill and started calling him Danny Phantom…"_

"_Inviso-Bill?" _said the gruff voice of another Far Frozen ghost. _"Why call him that in the first place?"_

Another ghost added, _"It sounds ridiculous."_

"_W-well, we didn't know much about him," _Thunder explained quickly. _"Ba-back then, we thought he was an evil ghost. I mean, he kidnapped the mayor and stole from the jewelry stores…"_

"_I can understand why humans would be angry with him," _Frostbite began slowly. _"But I believe there has been a misunderstanding."_

"_We have physical evidence placing Mr. Phantom at each crime. I doubt there is—"_

"_Hey! Mr. Thunder!"_

Timmy screamed in delight and began jumping on the couch again. "The Ghost Boy's back! The Ghost Boy's back! The Ghost Boys—"

Lancer ran a hand down his face, breathing in slow, steady breaths. _This is why I'm a high school teacher…_

…_Not that they're much better…_

* * *

It's not that short.

**For the record, this Timmy isn't Timmy from the Fairly Odd Parents show. I just liked the childish feel of the name :) The kid is from the Christmas special. Saisailove actually gave me the idea to use him, so yup.**

**I did fanart! I, who drew weird looking cats and called it art, have drawn a messy Danny! I was doodling and it came out better than I thought it would XD Since I'm the one who owns this plot, would I call it fanart or art? ...Safer to say fanart, I guess, since it's in the DP fandom. The link can be found in my profile if you want to check it out.**

**Thanks for reading!**

**Edit: Oh, I forgot! **"Whoa!" Timmy exclaimed. He laughed and clapped his hands together. "That's way better than the coin trick that fat clown did at my birthday party!" **That gave me an idea, but I don't want to do it myself, so I'm making a challenge! *Clears throat* "Danny Phantom accidentally crashes a kids birthday party, knocking out the clown or whatever was entertaining the kids. Now he has to entertain the brats himself or risk spoiling a kid's very special birthday party. Before PP and the children can't be related to any of the characters...well, maybe related to Valerie if you want to make it more interesting, but that's it!" Eh, any questions, just PM me or leave it in a review.**


	11. Arrival of Doom

**Sorry this took so long, guys. The chapter was very uncooperative ;P**

**The really bad thing about the way I reply to reviews now, is that it just _feeds_ on procrastination. Gods dang it! It is not procrastinator friendly! It didn't really help that my dog thought my laptop's power cord made a nice chew toy -_- I'll give thanks here, and see what I can do later. Probably reply to both reviews if you review again. **

**Thanks to: **LynnBrook, AnimationNut, Aurora Borealis 97, Kung-fu Blaziken, mandolindoodler, Phantomgirl96, Keeper 101, stick fight3, Danny Phantom Phanatic, 1337kitsune, Rubble, Kiomori, isadorathegreat, , Dracon Ashara, KatiekkXD, Biisaiyowaq, Ghostdragon 101, Anne Camp aka Obi-quiet, MiyamotousagiFan, Codiak, Xeiden, Tay1019411, Making it through, GhostDog401, Alactricity, TweenisodeOrange, Adisynne, Souxie2.0, readingisawesome, acosta perez jose ramiro, DP-shrine-in-closet-girl, fawnlovesyou, Hebi R., Kristallos, The Silver Radio, nightmaster000, Trinity Fenton-Phantom, Color like whoa, Breathe Breathe Breathe, CaligoAngelus, irezel, Silverbulletsdeath, Mikoto-chan92, tsuki107, Fugitive of Gray, Saphireswimming, ShoyDragon, iJuStbARfED, Crazy-ghost-girl, Star1the2friend, Trolly's Bara-chan, Mak8907, i love Danny Phantom, hahahippo, Serlenia, nightmarekitt, Aria, Hanzo of the Salamander, Sarahhaley, Little bit 1o1, obsessivereader95, and Osprey Eamon.** Thanks you guys!  
I feel really, really bad because there were a lot of awesome reviews, and coupled with the late update, I feel _so_ ashamed, like I let you guys down...I'm gonna go draw in the dirt now...**

**I don't own Danny Phantom, and beta'd by dragondancer123 (and I think I'm posting this without her clearance so shh...) Hope ya like!**

* * *

Chapter 11  
Arrival of Doom

If Madeline were to walk into a room full of hostile ghosts, she wouldn't yell a greeting and draw every eye to herself. She wouldn't proceed to run into said hostile room, dodging around each undead specter as if they weren't twitching with the urge to separate her soul from her body. Truce or no truce, secret on the line or not, Maddie would never take such a thoughtless risk.

Therefore, Vlad was convinced Daniel inherited said reckless behavior solely from his idiot father.

Vlad pinched the bridge of his nose, but followed Daniel and his clone into the throne room at a more sedate pace. Each step echoed off the walls as the specters watched the infamous group enter their domain in hushed silence. Vlad smirked, and was amused when a few weaker ghosts backed away.

He didn't understand why the two Phantoms were so worried. Lance was safe in the company of the Tribe of Abominable Snow-people. And while Vlad was sure his contemptuous feelings toward the Tribe was mutual, the Far Frozen were allied with Daniel. They would keep Daniel's (and by extension, Vlad's) secret safe.

"Mr. Thunder!" Daniel managed to stop his momentum before he could run into the reporter, but he didn't give himself or Lance a chance to breathe in relief. He grabbed the man's shoulders and began searching him for injuries. "Are you hurt?"

Danielle floated above Daniel's head so her eyes were inches from Lance's own. "Did anybody scare you?"

"I mean I doubt they can hurt you—"

"No, but they can _scare_ him, and you said he can't breathe when he gets scared!"

"Oh yeah, good point! Did they scare you? How long weren't you breathing?"

Lance blinked at the worried Phantoms. "Uh…"

"Oh my gosh, Danny!" Danielle fisted Daniel's hair and used her grip to shake his head. "Forget scared! He's scarred for life!"

"What did they do to you, man?"

"They're mental terrorists, Danny! They could have done anything to him without us there to protect him!"

"Oh my—"

"That's enough, children." Vlad snagged Danielle from the air and grabbed Daniel's shoulder, pulling them away from the stunned reporter. Daniel stumbled, but regained his composure, and glared at the man. Danielle struggled out of his grip and joined her original in glaring.

Vlad ignored them in favor of smiling gently at Lance. "I must apologize for their behavior, Lance. They were very concerned when we lost you."

Lance smiled shakily back. "I—Uh, yes, that's understandable, I suppose. I was quite scared myself. It was rather overwhelming."

Daniel shifted on his feet. "I'm sorry, Mr. Thunder. I promised I would protect you from danger, but when it came down to it, I couldn't bring myself to…" He cut himself off and looked down at his shoes.

Lance frowned, but didn't comment.

"At any rate," Vlad said, "I am pleased to see you unharmed, Lance. No doubt we have the…Far Frozen to thank."

Daniel perked up at this. He turned to Frostbite and the Far Frozen, smiling gratefully. "Yeah, thanks. I don't know what I would have done without your help." He paused, and, almost as an afterthought, placed his hand over his chest and executed a—wobbly—bow. "I am in your debt."

Frostbite smiled, pleased with Daniel's attempt at formality. "On the contrary, it was our pleasure to aid you, Great One." He placed his own hand over his core and inclined his head. The remaining the Far Frozen followed their leader's example. A crowd of fierce snowmen bowed humbly to a half-human teenager. The other ghosts in the room began whispering amongst themselves.

If Vlad had been presented with such a show of deference and humility, he would have glowed with pride and basked in their worship. Daniel, child that he was, merely blushed and rubbed his neck, embarrassed, but pleased.

Vlad felt a burning in his eyes, signifying the eerie stare, dubbed scary eyes. It was _his_ dream, _his_ destiny to be king, not Daniel's. And yet these fools bowed before a boy that thought a steward was a type of soup.

Vlad forcefully shook his head and shoved the spark of jealousy to the back of his mind. This was not the place.

Lance was diligently recording this scene, as enthralled as the other ghosts in the room. Vlad cleared his throat, but when the reporter didn't respond, he dropped a hand on his shoulder. The human jumped in surprise and faced him with wide eyes. Vlad allowed him a second to compose himself, also using that second to select a topic change.

Vlad raised an eyebrow. "Whatever happened to your camera, Lance?"

Lance blinked and looked down at the camera in his hands. "Oh, well, I'm not quite sure…"

Danielle flew over and inspected the camera for herself. "It kind of looks like the Red Huntess's outfit, doesn't it, Danny?"

Considering the last discussion they'd enjoyed with Lance, Vlad was unsurprised when Ms. Gray's title earned Daniel's full attention. "Yeah." He frowned, tilting his head to the side. "But she got her suit from Technus, Master of Monologuing, and he only did that to distract me. Why would he upgrade someone else's camera?"

Lance's eyes took on the Reporter's Glint Vlad was so familiar with. "You know the Red Huntress?"

Daniel flinched. "Um…maybe…"

Danielle cut in cheerfully, "He does! He knows her _very_ well."

"Danielle?"

"Hmm?"

Daniel jerked his clone into a headlock. Before she had a chance to squeak a protest, Daniel scrubbed his fist against her scalp.

Danielle shrieked, and struggled to escape his grasp. "Ow! Ow! Danny, stop! Ow, my hair! You're ruining it, ow! Let go!" Cujo barked excitedly and jumped around the Phantoms' feet.

"Are you going to stop?" Daniel asked her, an evil grin on his face.

"Stop what?"

"You know what."

"No, I—" Daniel scrubbed harder. "Ow, ow, ow! Okay! I'll stop!"

Daniel paused. "Promise?"

"I promise!"

Daniel grinned triumphantly. "Good." He unhooked his arm, and his clone quickly flew out of his reach. She pouted and combed her fingers through her hair. "So this is what it's like to have a little sister."

Danielle stuck her tongue out at him. "Being your cousin is bad enough," she said. "I don't think either of us would survive the sibling rivalry."

"Yeah, I guess not."

Lance cleared his throat. "You _do_ know the Red Huntress? Better than most ghosts?"

Daniel flinched. "If I say 'yes' you're going to ask a lot of personal questions, aren't you?"

Lance frowned and straightened his shoulders. "It's my job, Mr. Phantom. I'm sure you understand."

The boy crossed his arms over his chest. "No, Mr. Thunder, I don't. I can't answer questions about the Red Huntress because they aren't questions I'm allowed to answer. She's already after my hide—I don't need her breathing down my neck for _another_ imagined wrong."

"'_Another_ imagined wrong'?" Lance asked, leaning towards Daniel. "Am I to assume you have wronged her before?"

"What? No!"

"But you said—"

"I never did anything wrong! She just blames me!"

"For what?"

"_Everything_! A ghost dog attacks Axion Labs, must be my dog, therefore my fault. A metal robot kidnaps us—_both_ of us, _my_ fault. Hell, she blames me for her relationship with her boyfriend going sour! If her tire goes flat, it'll be my fault, because I just _live_ to torment her."

"So…" Lance smiled. "How did you two meet? How did she become the Red Huntress? Is there a romantic spark buried beneath all that hatred? Do you know her secret identity? What is your opinion of her?"

Daniel opened his mouth. Stopped, then groaned and slapped his forehead. Repeatedly.

"Great One."

Daniel looked at Frostbite with a raised eyebrow. "Yeah, Frostbite?"

Frostbite pointed up at the multicolored lights bobbing around the room. Vlad stared at the orbs. He had seen something similar created from his own hand when he needed a light source, but he'd never seen so many in one place or in such a variety of shades and colors. However, he had researched the protocol of ghost weddings and knew what these lights represented.

He grinned. "Ah, yes. The Orbs of Attendance. I almost forgot."

Daniel frowned. "The what of what now?"

"Why, the Orbs of Attendance," Vlad repeated. "It's there in the very name."

Daniel's frown deepened at his superior tone. Ah, he loved tormenting the boy. "Sorry, I didn't take Cryptic 101. Explain, Plasmius?"

Vlad sighed explosively. "If I must." Daniel scowled, no doubt becoming more annoyed by the second. "Certain occasions such as Century Meetings and Ghost Weddings command every ghost, no matter how weak or strong, to attend. But as you can imagine, there are far too many ghosts existing in the Ghost Zone for any one body to keep track of. So the ancients devised a way to—"

"I really don't need a history lesson, Plasmius," Danny said. "Just skip to the point."

Vlad glared at him. "My dear boy, history is very important. But if you insist…" Daniel nodded unnecessarily. Vlad sighed. "Upon entering the designated meeting place—in this case, the Throne Room of Pariah Dark—ghosts are to create a ball of ectoplasm and allow it to float freely above them. When all the ghosts are present and all the activities taken care of, the Orbs gather together and illuminate the altar and the aisle. This is the signal for the wedding to begin. After everyone has taken their designated seats and positions, the bride shall walk down the glowing aisle."

"Oh." Daniel blinked. "That's…that's fancy…"

"You're dealing with _ghosts_, Daniel," Vlad said. "Ghosts have powers humans can only _dream_ of having, so of _course_ a spectral wedding will be more extravagant than a human wedding."

"Sometimes a simple display is more powerful than a fancy presentation." Daniel smiled. "Learned that in English class! I mean the _notes_ from English class…" He cleared his throat. "Anyway, just create a ball of ectoplasm?"

Vlad sighed. "Yes, Daniel. Be sure to give it enough power to keep itself stable, but not so much it's too heavy to float on its own."

Daniel frowned. "Uh, right…"

Vlad rolled his eyes. "Like this…" He held out his hand and willed his energy to condense around his palm. A small ball of pink ectoplasm began to form. It was about the size of a golf ball, but its radiance extended to that of a softball. Vlad lifted his hand into the air and the pink orb floated off to join the others hovering above them.

Daniel watched it float away before looking down at his own palm. "All right, here goes." His brows furrowed in concentration, and slowly a ball of neon green energy formed. It was larger than Vlad's, but it gave off less light.

"Condense it," Vlad instructed.

The orb in Daniel's palm pulsed, contracting and expanding in bursts. Daniel scowled, and muttered, "Harder than it looks…"

Danielle held out her own hand and began gathering an Orb of Attendance. Her look of concentration was unsettlingly similar to Daniel's to anyone who didn't know their connection.

"Why is it so hard for Mr. Phantom to create an Orb of Attendance?" Lance asked. "Surely he is strong enough…?"

Vlad smirked. "Creating an Orb requires very little power, Lance. Ghosts of varying degrees of ability are gathered here, so it would be senseless to force everyone to create an object that required power outside the weaker ghosts' scope. Daniel is more accustomed to brute strength, however, which is why he is having so much trouble using his brain to mold the energy."

"I heard that, Plasmius," Daniel grumbled.

"I did it!" Danielle cried. She raised her hand, showing off her brightly glowing orb. She tossed it between her hands a couple times before throwing it up to join the others.

Daniel groaned. "This is just embarrassing…" His Orb shrank, and Danny narrowed his eyes, concentrating on shrinking it further.

"Well, girls are said to learn faster than boys," Danielle said.

"Shh, Dani, I'm concentrating."

"If you want I can give you some hints?"

"No thanks."

"You—"

"Dani, hush!"

Danielle huffed and crossed her arms. "I was just trying to help."

"I don't need help."

"Are you sure about that, my boy?" Vlad asked. "I expected you to have it by now."

"Shut up, Vlad."

"Perhaps if you allowed me to train you…"

"_Never_ going to happen."

Frostbite cleared his throat. "On their first attempt, some ghosts prefer to use both hands, Great One."

Danny glanced at him, before bringing his other hand over the Orb. It expanded briefly, but Danny pressed his hands closer together. As he compressed the Orb, it gave off a steady expanse of light, reaching past Danny's hands. He cupped his hands around it, the green light escaping between the gaps of his fingers. A few seconds later, he carefully removed his hand from the, now perfectly sized, Orb.

"I got it!" He grinned, admiring his creation. "I've done something like this before," he added thoughtfully. "But it wasn't as bright—or as hard to make. It's kinda like a mini sun. Temperature and pressure are needed to keep it stable."

Vlad rolled his eyes. "Yes, congratulations, Daniel. You finally created what took your cousin and me a few seconds to make. When you're finished admiring your handiwork, kindly allow it to join the others so we can make your arrival official."

Daniel scowled at him. "Do you ever get tired of being pompous, Plasmius?"

Vlad raised a mocking eyebrow. "Oh? You know that word?"

"Duh."

Vlad smirked. "Your sister taught it to you, didn't she?"

"…No…" Daniel coughed into his fist, a light dusting of pink on his cheeks. "Right! So I have officially arrived once I let this thing go?"

"Yes, Great One," Frostbite answered.

Daniel smiled and raised his hand, palm face up. The momentum lifted the light-weight Orb off his hand. It continued to float upwards until it was surrounded by the other ghost-made lights. The Orbs seemed to migrate toward the newcomer, welcoming it as they crowded around it.

A second later, its creator faced the same fate when he was mobbed by overeager ghosts below it.

* * *

The hunters at the ghost convention watched as Danny Phantom was mobbed by his fellow apparitions. It was confusing to watch, but since Lance and his camera were insubstantial in that world, the camera's vision wasn't obscured too greatly by the ghosts jostling around him. Phantom looked completely mortified just before he was buried beneath the ghosts.

"Interesting," Maddie mused aloud, tapping her pencil's eraser against her chin. "Those ghosts are treating the Ghost Kid like a celebrity."

Jazz chuckled. "I guess he has Phans everywhere. I don't know who's more surprised. Him or us."

"_WHAT IS GOING ON?"_

Maddie and Jazz shared an amused look. "Him," they said together.

Maddie smiled as she wrote down their newest discovery about Phantom. Jazz leaned back in her foldable chair, and watched her little brother fight for his freedom.

"_Whatever happened to the no fights allowed rule?" _Danny shouted. His voice was muffled by the ghosts' bodies and their loud questions, but it was easily discernable to Jazz.

"_They aren't trying to fight you, Danny!" _Dani replied. Her voice was easier to hear over the ghosts' commotion. Probably because she and Vlad were standing next to Thunder._ "They just want to touch you! Maybe get a few strands of your hair, your saliva, some harmlessly gathered blood…"_

"_What are they? Piranhas? 'Harmlessly gathered blood' sounds like an oxymoron!"_

"_It's not, Daniel," _Vlad said, his tone amused. _"But nice try."_

"_GET THEM OFF ME!"_

"_Say the magic word, Daniel."_

"_Get. Them. Off. Me!"_

"_I said 'word', my boy. As in singular."_

"_Plasmius!"_

"_That's better, but not quite what I'm looking for."_

Jazz tried not to laugh at her brother's expense, but Vlad made it so hard. His remarks appealed to her intellectual side. Besides. How would Danny know she found his archenemy funny?

"I wonder why they hold him in such high regard," Maddie said. "I'm sure I have seen him fight some of those ghosts."

Jazz shrugged. "The ones who are his enemies might be following the crowd so they can irritate him while still saying true to the truce. The others are probably like the Far Frozen ghosts; they might want to see the ghost who defeated the Ghost King."

Maddie hummed. "Possible. But it may also be we are missing a vital point here. He may be in cahoots with these ghosts…A leader of some sort…"

"Do you have evidence to back up your theory?" Jazz questioned, her eyes narrowed on her mother.

Maddie pursed her lips. "It's merely cautious speculation, Jazz, sweetie. This ghost knows how to access our lab with ease. Now more than ever, we have to keep our guard up where Phantom is concerned."

Jazz winced. Her parents would doubtless start inventing more high-tech security to protect their equipment as soon as they returned home. Higher security meant more trouble for Danny, which meant more work for Jazz.

"Besides," Maddie continued, her hands fisting around the pencil and paper. "He humiliated us in front of all these hunters. He's going to pay for that."

Jazz sighed. She knew his actions were going to come back and bite Danny on the butt.

They were at the ghost convention. At present, the convention hosted over more than two hundred devotees, including the most experienced ghost experts, Jack and Maddie Fenton.

Once ghost hunting started being taken seriously, so too were the Fentons. They were finally given the respect and acknowledgement due for all their years of ghost hunting. A fan base had even been established for them. When they entered the ghost convention, they were greeted by applause, praise, questions, and apologies—something they had been craving for a long time.

But it had all gone downhill when Danny Phantom entered their laboratory, stole their most impressive invention, and mocked Maddie without fear. It was a crushing blow to the Fenton's pride. All in all, Jazz was unsurprised by her parents' newest grudge against her little brother's alter ego; though she wished they would just forgive and forget the older ones.

"When I get my hands on that spook," Jack ranted beside Maddie, "I'll tear it apart molecule by molecule! And then atom by atom! No one humiliates us Fentons!"

"Shh, Dad," Jazz hissed. "You're disturbing everyone."

"What a _riot_, dude!" one of the Ghost Breakers cried.

"He's, like, being assaulted, man," the woman from Groovy Gang said.

"Or you would be," Jazz mumbled, "if we were among ordinary people …"

"You _wanted_ to come here, Jazz," Maddie reminded her.

"Yeah," Jazz agreed, "to put the finishing touches on my college thesis. I'm surrounded by people _suffering_ from ghost envy, but I'm unable to do _anything_ about it because they're all too absorbed with Danny Phantom to answer my questions!"

"Jinkers!" the guy from Groovy Gang exclaimed. "Like, keep it down. Some people are, like, trying to watch this, you know."

Jazz made a face and sunk into her chair, cheeks burning from embarrassment.

On the tarp-screen, the ghost version of Danny's Phans were finally backing off, allowing Danny his breathing space. The reason why became apparent a second later as Cujo, in fearsome guard dog mode, was revealed standing over Danny, growling threateningly at the Phans.

Danny, curled into a ball to protect himself, lifted his head from his arms and looked around cautiously. His hair was disheveled, and his suit jacket was wrinkled and askew, but otherwise he didn't look overly ravaged. A little disoriented and freaked out, but not too terrible considering this was the first time he'd been successfully mobbed.

He warily eyed the nearby ghosts as he climbed back to his feet. From the new perspective, Jazz could see his undershirt was as rumpled as the rest of him. It was untucked and a few of the buttons undone. Even though Jazz found the whole incident amusing, seeing her little baby brother like this…violated by his own Phans… It was disturbing.

Danny rebuttoned his shirt and straightened his jacket, keeping a wary eye on the few Phans lingering outside Cujo's range. He ran his fingers through his white hair, and though Jazz would never admit it, she envied his ability to fix his hair without needing a hairbrush or comb.

"_I _never_ want to go through that again,"_ he said, sounding shaken. He placed his hands on the small of his back, and leaned backwards until Jazz heard an audible 'pop'. He sighed and let his arms drop to his side, his whole body sagging.

"_Feel better, _old_ man?" _Danielle asked.

"_Much better, no thanks to you, _youngster_." _

Cujo looked over his shoulder at Danny, sniffing him for injuries. Danny grinned and jumped on him, hugging the ghost dog's massive neck. His momentum jerked Cujo slightly off balance, but neither seemed to mind.

"_Who's the best guard dog __around__?" _Danny cooed, adopting his 'baby talk' tone. He scratched Cujo's ear vigorously. The dog's tongue rolled out as he leaned into Danny's touch. _"Yeah, buddy, you're the best! The best bodyguard a guy could ask for!"_

The praise and scratching proved too strong for his anger, and Cujo soon shrank back to his puppy form. For a few nanoseconds, he and Danny remained suspended in the air where Cujo's head had been. Then they fell together in a heap. Danny laughed and rubbed Cujo's belly, Cujo wiggling in delight. Danny stood up, and Cujo hopped onto his feet again, running around Danny's ankles.

Danny chuckled and dropped to his knees. Cujo ran into his arms, and began licking his face._ "We forgot to dress you up, didn't we, boy?"_ he said. He gently pushed Cujo away. _"I love you too, Cujo, but right now I need you to _sit_." _Cujo sat. _"Good boy."_

Danny reached for his tie, but found his collar empty. His eyes widened, and looked down, searching with his eyes and hands. _"Hey, where'd the tie go?"_ He paused, sighed, and faced the remaining Phans. _"Alright, which one of you stole my tie?"_

The Phans—mostly female—giggled, as if they found his indignant attitude cute.

Danny groaned. _"It's not funny! Lady Hairdresser is going to kill me if I don't return this suit whole and intact. She even told me so!" _His eyes widened and his lower lip trembled slightly. He used his puppy face so often, Jazz wasn't sure if he was even conscious of its usage now. _"Please give it back?"_

The Phans giggled again and made cooing noises.

The innocent look vanished from Danny's visage. He scowled at them and huffily crossed his arms. _"Jerks…"_

"_Really, Daniel," _Vlad said. _"You should know by now asking politely won't have any impact on bloodthirsty fans."_

"_Oh yeah?" _Danny asked, turning his glare on Vlad. _"Then how do _you_ suggest I get the dang tie back, huh?"_

"_Who knows?" _Vlad replied, nonchalant. _"As soon as your possession is captured in their greedy little hands, you might as well forget about it."_

"_Can't I just get it back after the wedding is over?"_

"_By that time, the thief and your tie will either be long gone, or impossible to find."_

Danny grimaced. He looked down at Cujo, his lips pursed and his shoulders sagging. _"I don't suppose you can fetch it, Cujo? I doubt they could hide it from you." _Cujo's tail wagged as he returned to all fours. Danny smiled. _"Might as well give it a try, I guess. Alright, go fetch, boy! Find the tie! Fetch the tie!" _Cujo barked, and ran towards the Phans. He disappeared into the crowd, but his barks could still be heard.

Jazz heard Vlad scoff. _"You can't possibly believe that mutt can find your tie, Daniel."_

"_Why not?" _Danny asked. _"He knows my scent."_

"_It takes a certain amount of intelligence for an animal to connect the English language to an item or command."_

"_Cujo is smart," _Danny defended, his eyes narrowing.

"_Undoubtedly," _Vlad said, though his sarcastic tone spoke his doubt.

"_Just watch. He'll—"_

A girl's angry scream rose above their voices. A second later, Cujo came running back to Danny, the missing green tie clamped in his mouth. He jumped into Danny's outstretched arms. He gazed up at Danny, his tail wagging and his ears perked up expectantly for scratches.

Danny grinned triumphantly in Vlad's direction. His hand absently scratched Cujo's ears and head. _"See?"_

"Interesting," Maddie said. "That dog is either very intelligent, or trained exceptionally well to search for missing objects."

Danny grabbed the tie and tried to pull it from Cujo's mouth, but the ghost dog clamped down on the tie and tugged back. Danny's eyes narrowed. _"Oh no, Cujo._ _Not now, and not with this tie. Drop."_ Cujo jerked his head from side to side, hauling against Danny's hold until he was no longer in Danny's grasp. His tail wagged widely behind him. _"Cujo! Drop it!" _The boy and his dog entered in a one-sided tug-a-war game.

"Well," Maddie amended, "mostly trained."

"_Oh no, you're right, Daniel," _Vlad said. _"I cannot _believe_ I misjudged his intelligence. Why, he must be as smart as you."_

"_Ha…ha…"_ Danny grunted.

A tear began to develop on the tie. Danny's eyes widened, before narrowing in determination. He heaved the tie and the struggling dog into his arms, but Cujo refused to let go. His playful growls increased in volume as Danny tried to—gently—separate him and the dress tie. Danny leaned down and blew air into Cujo's upright ear. Cujo jolted in surprise, and Danny quickly jerked the tie out of his mouth.

Cujo whined in protest, and tried to bite the tie again, but Danny held him firmly against his side. _"No, Cujo. This is _not_ a chew toy. But if you behave, I promise to play with you later, alright?" _

Cujo wiggled in his grip. Danny let him go, and the puppy jumped out of his lap. He faced Danny, his eyes locked on the tie dangling in his hand. Danny gave him a stern look and commanded him to sit. After a second's hesitation, Cujo's rump lowered.

Danny smiled. _"Good boy."_ He brought the tie towards Cujo's neck. The puppy snapped at it, and Danny quickly pulled it away. _"Cujo,"_ he said warningly. Cujo whined unhappily, but when Danny brought the tie towards him again, he didn't try to bite it. Danny quickly tied the tie into a bow around Cujo's neck. Danny grinned and stood back up._ "There. Now I don't have to wear it."_

"_You did all that," _Dani said, disbelief in her tone, _"just so you wouldn't have to wear a tie?"_

"_No," _Danny said. _"I did all that so I wouldn't have to _learn_ how to tie a tie."_

"_I could have tied it for you, Daniel," _Vlad pointed out, sounding slightly hurt.

Danny mocked a laugh. _"And willingly let you near my neck? Not in this lifetime, Plasmius."_

"_You FINALLY arrived!"_

Danny spun around. Thunder pointed in the direction Danny was facing. The camera found the Box Ghost rocketing over the crowd of ghosts and diving headfirst towards Danny. Before Danny could react, the box loving ghost catapulted into him, engulfing the surprised boy in a bear hug and spinning them around in the air a few times.

They stopped spinning, and the Box Ghost switched his hold on Danny. He wrapped an arm around his shoulders and surveyed the crowd before him with an important air. _"Now that my best man is here," _the box ghost exclaimed formally, _"we shall finally begin the preparations!"_

The ghosts cheered, but Danny's eyes widened in horror.

"_Wait! _What_?"_

Jack jumped up and pointed an accusing finger at the tarp-turned-screen. "The Caterer Ghost is in cahoots with that Phantom creep!"

The ghost hunters around them shouted in agreement.

Jazz groaned and wished for the thousandth time she was born into a _normal_ family—one that didn't talk during movies and shows.

* * *

**So how was that? Not a whole lot happened considering you all had to wait three months to get this, but it was still entertaining, right? hehe, poor Danny...**

**Nobody took up my challenge from last chapter, so I might try it in my one-shot collection. Might. If you want to do it yourself, please go ahead. **

**I'm almost halfway done with the next chapter, so it shouldn't take as long. I'm trying to get Danny's reaction to Box Ghost's announcement just right, as well as getting Box Ghost in character. Surprisingly, I'm having trouble with our box-loving ghost o.O**

**Thanks for reading! Leave a review and I _promise_ I'll get back to you as soon as I can.**


	12. Best Man for the Job

**Well, I'm back. Miss me? ;)**

**I tried to get to all the reviews, but it got really confusing, and I think I replied to some of you twice and some of you not at all...sorry...If you want to know the reason why I'm so late, I explain it in my profile. Anyway, I've started college, so my priorities are like this: College/homework, job, writing my stories, and then replying. I'm sorry, but I'm a procrastinator so this isn't set in stone, if you know what I mean ;)  
(SaiSaiLove and Kristellos, I'll review both of your arts as soon as I can - I'm really sorry it's taking so long, but I've been (and still am, honestly) busy. Sorry. But I _will_ do that :) )**

**On another note: *.* 500+ reviews?-! *Faints* I'm unworthy! And I only _just_ hit the halfway mark now. If I near 1,000 I'll...I'll... *Spazzs* ...You guys are awesome *-*  
**

**I don't own any of the characters/names/ect. Beta'd by Dragon, thanks for the help :D  
**

* * *

Chapter 12  
Best Man for the Job

Ember walked through the Ghost King's halls with a bounce in her steps and a wicked smirk on her lips, but she wasn't the only one. Her fellow apparitions wore similar expressions of eager malevolence. The only two not enjoying the anticipation were Dora and Wulf, Danny's two allies.

"You should have told Sir Phantom," Dora scolded them. "He has enough to worry about without being forced into a position he did not expect."

Ember laughed haughtily. "We are his _enemies_, 'Princess'. It's our _job_ to make his life miserable—it makes our own enjoyable."

"The boy deserves it for abandoning us in the Dressing Room," Desiree added with a smirk. "We would have told him on the way to the Throne Room…If we felt like it."

"Yeah, so it's really the dweeb's own fault," Youngblood said. "He should have waited. Sucks to be him!"

"My only regret," Skulker said, "is that I won't be there to witness the look of horror on the Ghost Child's face once he finds out he's the Box Ghost's best man." Danny's enemies chuckled.

"That _is_ a shame," Desiree agreed.

"Ain't that weatherman recording everything?" Youngblood asked. "We could commandeer the internet and watch it ourselves once this dumb party is over."

Ember hooked an arm around the young pirate's neck. "I knew there was a reason I liked you, kid!"

"Speaking of the Whelp's pet," Skulker said, "what are we going to do about him?"

"We can do nothing," Walker replied. "Like the punk, we are unable to touch the darn human."

"And even if we did manage to hurt him," Desiree added, "Phantom would surely carry out his revenge—truce or not."

Skulker nodded. "You have a point. But just because we can't _hurt_ his pet, doesn't mean we can't strike at our true target."

"What are you planning?" Ember asked, smiling eagerly. Skulker's diabolical ideas where what attracted her to him in the first place.

"The Child is very protective of the reporter," Skulker explained, "but more than that, he is cautious over what the human hears and reports. He has many secrets he doesn't want the humans to know about. I say we…_divulge_ some of those secrets to ease the pressure off the poor child's shoulders…"

Ember and the rest of Danny's enemies grinned maliciously.

Dora's eyes narrowed. "You have _no right_ to reveal Sir Phantom's closely guarded secrets."

"I believe we went over this, _Princess_," Ember said. "We'll do whatever the hell we want, and there's nothing you can do to stop us."

"Oh!" Youngblood shouted, waving his hook in the air. "Oh! We can make a game out of it!"

Desiree rolled her eyes. "Do we look like children?"

"You are certainly acting like immature children," Dora murmured.

"Youngblood has a good idea," Ember mused. "Why _don't_ we make a game out of it? The one who reveals the most of Danny's secrets wins."

"What are the rules?" Walker asked.

"A secret can only be exposed once," Ember said, "but it can be expanded on."

"Rumors," Desiree said. "Can we use rumors?"

"Only if they lead to one of the secrets being exposed," Skulker answered. "They don't count as actual secrets."

"The larger the secret," Ember said, "the more he fights to keep it hidden, the better. We want the dipstick to _squirm_."

"Sir Phantom's major secret is off limits," Dora said sternly. "The secret of him being only half ghost cannot be revealed."

Ember scoffed. "Where's the fun in that? That's the juiciest secret he has!"

"It's his _main_ secret," Dora explained. "Once it is revealed, all others become obsolete."

Ember grimaced. "Fine. We won't expose his condition…not until the reception, anyway. Once the party starts to get old, it's anything goes!"

"What does the winner get?" Youngblood asked.

"Yes, what is the prize?" Desiree questioned.

"Bragging rights," Skulker answered. "For a whole year."

The other ghosts cheered.

Dora scowled. "Sir Phantom may not have many allies, but there are enough of us that you should think twice before playing this game." Wulf growled agreement.

"Oh please," Desiree said. "Who does the Child have? You, Wulf, the Furry Icicles, and his 'cousin'. I'm _terrified_."

Dora smirked. "You are underestimating him. He also has Sir Plasmius (in this instance), Queen Pandora, and Master Clockwork."

"Clockwork?" Ember's eyes widened. "He has a _time master_ as an ally?"

Dora lifted her chin proudly. "Indeed."

"Who's 'Clockwork'?" Youngblood asked, scratching his head with his hook.

"He's the Master of Time, shrimp," Skulker said. "He answers to the Observants, but he's still incredibly powerful. How did the Ghost Child manage to acquire him as an ally?"

Dora pursed her lips. "The details are hazy, but I believe Sir Phantom helped Master Clockwork defeat a great enemy."

"The dipstick _helped_ Clockwork?" Ember asked skeptically. "What could a Time Lord possibly need help with? Especially from a half human freak?"

"You can ask him when he arrives," Dora said in a dismissive tone. "I've told you all I know on the matter."

Ember flicked her unbound hair over her shoulder. "I doubt Clockwork will be interested in our affairs with Phantom, even if they _are_ on good terms. Time Masters are notorious for staying on the sidelines. Our game is still on."

Skulker smirked. "And the Ghost Child better…_beware_…"

* * *

As Phantom stammered on the television, Paulina's heart beat wildly against her chest. She hadn't made the connection before, but with the announcement of Danny Phantom's role in the wedding, Paulina realized she would be seeing her future husband in her dream situation. Granted, he wasn't the groom and she wasn't the bride, but it would still be magical to see her Phantom taking part in a wedding.

Paulina blushed, smiling dreamily.

_Walking down the aisle with her Papa at her side, Paulina glanced over the guests observing the procession. All the kids from school were there, the guys crying over the loss of their fantasy with her, and the girls watching in envy as she approached the altar. One girl in particular. Tears of jealousy and disappointment ran down her cheeks, because she'd waited too long and had lost her chance with her 'friend'. She'd tried to pull his attention away from Paulina, but once he met the real girl behind Paulina's façade, once he knew the _real_ Paulina, he'd fallen head over heels in love._

_Paulina smirked, and returned her eyes to her true love. Danny Phantom, beyond dashing in his black and silver tuxedo, smiled back at her, and Paulina's heart fluttered at the love-struck look in his eyes. _

_She ascended to the altar, but a strong grip on her hand stopped her from reaching her beloved. Paulina looked back at her Papa, and was touched to see tears streaming down his eyes. Phantom stepped forward, and grabbed Paulina's other hand. Papa switched his gaze to the superhero. Phantom smiled gently, nodded his head. Papa sniffed, but returned the gesture, finally allowing Paulina's hand to slip from his grasp._

_The ceremony would pass by in a blur, Paulina too lost in Phantom's electric green eyes to pay any attention to what the priest was saying. _

"_You may now kiss the bride," the priest said._

_Phantom smiled, and he leaned slowly toward Paulina. Her heart beat so wildly against her chest, she was afraid it might burst out of its confines. Phantom's eyes slid closed, and Paulina imitated his actions. She felt a coldness radiate against her lips, signaling how close the ghost was, and then—_

"_Are you insane?"_ Phantom shouted.

Paulina gasped, jolted from her fantasy.

On the television screen, Phantom shoved the Box Ghost away from him, looking confused and more than a little freaked out. _"You can't just—Why would you even—Don't I—How could—"_ Phantom fisted his hands in his hair, and pulled on the pearly white strands._ "Gahh!" _

"_Calm down, little badger," _Phantom's father chided from off-screen. _"You don't want to go bald on top of everything else, do you?"_

Paulina shivered. What a terrible image. Danny Phantom without his hair would be like Paulina without her makeup—a crime against fashion!

"_Shut up, Plasmius!" _Phantom snapped. He pointed a shaking finger at the Box Ghost. _"You! Why in the world would you want _me_ for your best man?_ _I—I lock you inside the thermos every day!"_

"_Your cylindrical container cannot contain the _BOX_ GHOST!" _the Box Ghost shouted.

"_It's the Fenton Thermos, and you're missing the point! Why would you choose _me_ of all people to be your best man? Why not Klemper? He's more of a friend than I am."_

"_NONSENSE!" _Box Ghost floated closer to Phantom, but the Ghost Boy backed away a few paces in response. _"You were there when I had my _confusing_ obsession CRISIS!"_

"_The mechanical frog thing lasted for, like, five seconds!"_

"_You aided me in overcoming the EVIL Box's influence—"_

"_You mean you _wanted_ to be defeated?"_

"—_which led to a BOOST in my already BOUNTIFUL _bounty_!"_

"_A side effect! It's not like I meant to!"_

"_You allowed me to escape Walker's PRISON of INFINITE PAIN!"_

"_That was just coincidence! I helped everyone escape."_

"_You…uh…Oh! You gave me the courage to—"_

"_Stop trying to deny it, Box Ghost! We aren't friends!"_

"_The fact that you knew what he was talking about each time, my boy," _Plasmius said, _"proves otherwise." _

"_Stay _out_ of this, Vlad." _ Phantom ran a hand through his hair, breathing deeply to calm himself. _"I lock you inside the thermos, I use you as an outlet, and I bag on you every chance I get. Why would you choose me out of every ghost here?"_

The Box Ghost pursed his lips, and rubbed his chin with his thumb and index finger. _"What you say is true. We are two souls, forever locked in an EPIC battle of WIT and powers that could tear asunder the very EARTH! We are archenemies, not best friends as the term Best Man implies!"_

Phantom coughed into his fist. _"Uh, I wouldn't go _that_ far…"_

"_But a few days ago," _the Box Ghost continued as if he hadn't heard him,_ "I myself wondered who should have the HONOR of being my Best Man. And then I came to a conclusion! My Best Man must share my talent for PUNS, and he must rival my powers in AWESOMENESS! The only ghost who matched this description of a worthy opponent in both fields, was YOU!"_

Danielle giggled off-screen. _"I told you those puns of yours would get you in trouble."_

"_When did you say that?" _Phantom demanded.

"_Just now."_

"_As a powerful ghost known throughout the Ghost Zone _and_ the HUMAN World," _Box Ghost continued, _"you are worthy of this honor I have bestowed upon you! No one shall question the BOX GHOST's decision of choosing THE Danny Phantom as his Best Man!"_

"_What? Wait." _ Phantom held up his hands. _"Basically, you're saying you chose me because I'm _popular_?" _The Ghost Boy tilted his head to the side, expression perplexed. _"Wow. Far cry from high school…" _he whispered just loud enough for the speakers to pick up.

Paulina clamped a hand over her mouth. The Ghost Boy hadn't been popular in high school? But he was so charming and heroic! How could those teenagers be so blind? Paulina shook her head. That was their loss; she certainly saw him for the amazing guy he was.

"_And powerful!"_ Box Ghost added. _"But more than that…"_ he leaned towards Phantom, gesturing to the boy to do the same, like he was going to tell him a great secret. The Ghost Boy hesitated, but floated a little closer to the groom. _"I chose you because…I WANTED YOU TO SUFFER!" _Phantom jerked away from him with a gasp, his hands clamped over his ears and a pained grimace on his face. The Box Ghost laughed manically, his laughter rolling with nasal undertones. _"MUHAHA! I am so evil!"_

"_Dang it, Box Ghost!" _Phantom hit the side of his head a couple times, like he was trying to restart his ears._ "Could you possibly yell louder? I don't think you busted my eardrums yet!"_

"_I AM THE BOX—"_

"_STOP IT!" _Phantom crossed his arms over his chest, and glared at the Box Ghost, his eyes roving over the ghost in front of him like he was trying to figure him out. Paulina took the time to do so herself.

Paulina didn't know the ghost on a personal level like she knew Phantom, but the Box Ghost was a familiar face. Out of all the enemies Phantom fought, none were as known by the Phan community as the Box Ghost. Not because he was particularly dangerous, but because he was the ghost that drew Phantom out into the open the most. Paulina herself had once staged a stakeout near a warehouse full of boxes in hopes that the Box Ghost would appear and lure Phantom to her location. It hadn't worked for her—and it'd been an awful experience because the warehouse had been near the docks, and the salty air had totally dried out her skin—but there were many success stories circumventing the Phantom Phan website.

The Box Ghost was stout, and completely unattractive, especially when standing next to the hot Danny Phantom. But Paulina had to admit, once you got him out of those dusty, raggedy overalls and into a proper suit, he went from ugly to…decent. He had replaced the beanie that was usually perched on his head with an old-fashioned top hat, and his suit was similar in design to Phantom's, except his had red undertones and ruby red trimming. Paulina assumed the colors were a personal request, because she couldn't imagine _why_ the fashionable Lady Hairdresser would clash that color of red with the Box Ghost's blue complexion.

"…_not very evil."_ Paulina shook her head, bringing her focus back on Phantom. His voice was so melodic she hadn't noticed him speaking earlier. _"What's so bad about being your best man? I mean, sure I'm surprised—_shocked_, really—but I'm not _mad_ or anything."_

A sigh floated through the speakers, and Vlad Plasmius came on-screen as he walked toward his son. Although Phantom was floating a few inches above the floor, Plasmius was still able to see over his head. If genetics ran true, Phantom would grow to be just as tall. Paulina blushed.

"_My boy,"_ Vlad said slowly, _"do you know nothing of weddings? Ghost or otherwise?"_

Phantom frowned suspiciously at the man. _"I know some things—I watch movies, you know."_

"_Hmm,"_ Vlad hummed. _"That's to be expected from a teenage boy, I suppose. But have you ever watched a romantic movie? Or, as you kids call them, a chicky fli—"_

"_No."_ Phantom wrinkled his nose, disgusted by the very suggestion. _"Never."_

"_Surely you must have watched one with a girlfriend—Oh, that's right!"_ Plasmius placed a hand over his forehead. _"How forgetful of me! You've never _had_ a girlfriend, and your 'friend' doesn't enjoy those types of movies. Perhaps you should try internet dating as well, Daniel."_

Phantom blushed, made all the cuter by the pout he tried unsuccessfully to turn into a scowl. Paulina smirked and curled her fingers around her lips. Every boy she ever dated resisted watching chick flicks, but they could never say no to her. And once she had Danny Phantom in her arms, she'd make him as addicted to romantic movies as Dash.

* * *

Lester was on a mission—a mission of revenge that would redeem geeks and nerds worldwide. Fellow underdogs would whisper of this act for years to come at the card table, spreading his tale of heroism from geek to nerd until all knew his name. This mission required stealth, bravery, cunning, and—

"I have to go pee, Lester."

—and better sidekicks…Lester paused in his search and glared over his shoulder at his comrade. "I told you to go before we left, Mikey!" he whispered.

"Yeah, but," Mikey squirmed on his feet, his hands between his legs, "I didn't want to miss Danny Phantom…"

"We're missing him _now_," Lester pointed out.

Mikey pouted. "Yes, but it wasn't _my_ idea to sneak off on some harebrained scheme. What if the jocks find us and—"

"They won't find us for the same reason you refused to use the bathroom when you had the chance." Lester opened the next door in the hallway, and peered inside the room. He didn't think Dash was into dinosaurs anymore, so he closed the door, and moved onto the next room.

Mikey waddled awkwardly after him, complaining under his breath. "I hope Dash has a bathroom attached to his room…"

Lester raised a walkie talkie to his lips, saying into the mike, "Alienfreak2, this is AlienFreak1. What's your status?"

"_**Single,"**_ Nathan's depressed voice sounded through the speaker. _**"Sadly, hopelessly, single. Oh, why won't you say **_**yes**_**, Valerie?"**_

Lester hit his forehead with the small communications device. His twin seriously needed to get over that girl. "That's not what I meant! What's _Phantom's_ status?"

"_**I believe he's single too."**_

Mikey pulled the walkie talkie out of his hands before Lester could attempt to break it over his skull. "_I_ have a girlfriend, Nathan," he said smugly.

"_**Oh yeah? Is she real this time, or an imaginary friend like the last one?"**_

Mikey's flushed face made his freckles stand out more noticeably. "T-Tiffany was real!"

"_**Tiffany? I thought her name was **_**Rachel**_**."**_

Mikey sputtered incoherently. Lester snatched the talkie from his slackened grip. "That's enough, you two," he said, glaring at the boy he could see. "None of us have a girlfriend—"

"I do too!"

"—but it's completely irrelevant—"

"_**Speak for yourself!"**_

"—because we are on a _mission_. Now tell me what has happened on _the show_, Nathan."

"_**Oh, um, the Box Ghost announced Danny Phantom as his Best Man."**_

Mikey stole the walkie talkie again before Lester could respond. "_Really_?" he exclaimed. "Why?"

"_**Phantom just asked the same thing…The Box Ghost seems to think they are friends because Phantom's been there for him in the past or something like that."**_

Lester rolled his eyes. He was just as curious about Danny Phantom as the next Amity Park civilian, but he could watch it on the internet later. Right now, he had a mission to accomplish. Lester nodded to himself, and then opened the next door. He grinned. There was a girly movie poster on the wall, and a pink teddy bear sat on the computer desk, but he'd bet his whole deck of playing cards this was Dash's room. It reeked of guy sweat.

"Guys!" he said. "I found it!"

"That can't be the only reason," Mikey said into the walkie talkie. "…Can it?"

Lester sighed. He seriously needed sidekicks who could stay focused. How did Fenton ever find his?

"_**He has other reasons it seems. He likes Phantom's taste for puns, admires his strength, and he wants the Ghost Boy's popularity—Cool!"**_

The excitement in Nathan's voice made Lester pause in the threshold. He looked back at Mikey. "What?" he asked.

"What?" Mikey repeated into the mike. "What is it?"

"_**Phantom just alluded to being unpopular in school!"**_

"Wow! You mean he was—Hey!"

Lester held the stolen walkie talkie close to his grinning face. "Was he a geek or a nerd? Why was he unpopular? Did he ever get bullied? Did he ever strike back against his bullies? How did he—"

"_**I said he **_**alluded**_** to being a loser. He didn't actually say it outright, and Thunder didn't question him about it."**_

Lester's shoulders drooped. "Oh…"

"_**But they might do an interview segment again. We can call in and ask him all about his high school experience then!"**_

Lester bit his lip. Although Nathan's idea sounded good, an interview segment would be the perfect time for the mission. With everyone distracted by the questions Phantom was answering, they wouldn't notice the noise coming from upstairs. Was it worth abandoning the mission just to find out if Phantom was once like them? Once so desperate for revenge and recognition, he'd risk social-life and limb just to prank his tormentors?

Lester nodded. Yes. It was worth sacrificing the mission…He sighed, and stared forlornly into Dash's room. "Alright, guys. We can continue this some other—oh!" He dashed into the room, berating himself for not thinking of it sooner.

Mikey gasped, and quickly ran in after him. "Lester! Lester, what is it?" His eyes landed on the bathroom attached to the bedroom, and he visibly straightened. "Yes! A bathroom!"

"Dash's computer!" Lester said. He dropped into the cushy computer chair, grinning from ear to ear. "This is perfect! We can watch the show _and_ find incriminating information about Dash on this baby."

Mikey tore his eyes away from his refuge. "We can watch Phantom through the Amity News website!"

"Exactly," Lester said, already typing the website into the address bar. The Amity News homepage loaded a second later, and the first link on the page was to a live feed of the wedding taking place in the Ghost Zone. Mikey and Lester shared triumphant grins.

"_**The Box Ghost seems to think he is tormenting Phantom by choosing him as his best man," **_Nathan said.

"Noted, Alienfreak2," Lester replied. "We're going to watch the show on Dash's computer now, so don't worry about informing us of the proceedings anymore."

"_**What? How? …Oh! The internet! I want to watch it up there too! It's too crowded down here."**_

"Negative! You need to stay there and alert us to approaching hostile jocks."

"_**That's not fair, Lester!"**_

"It's plenty fair because _I'm_ the one in charge. And it's Alienfreak1 over the com-link, stupid."

"_**I'm telling mom when we get home!"**_

"Then I'll tell her about the shrine you built to Valerie in your closet!"

"…_**You win this round..."**_

Lester smirked.

"Enough bickering!" Mikey shouted. He sat in the chair he'd dragged to Lester's side without the other kid's notice. "Click the link already!"

Lester raised one eyebrow. "I thought you needed to use the bathroom?"

"I can hold it."

Lester rolled his eyes. He settled back into the computer chair—wondering where Dash got the ultra-comfortable chair—and then clicked on the link.

* * *

Danny didn't know which was worse, being single at the ripe age of sixteen, or your lonely forty-plus old archenemy teasing you about the fact by throwing your suggestion of internet dating back in your face.

The boy stuttered and blushed, his brain straining to think up a witty retort. Unfortunately for him, even with all the failed love interests he's had in the past, he never once doubted his eligibility in the romance department. As a result, his arsenal of clever comebacks was woefully empty of anything he could use in this situation, and it must have shown on his face, because Vlad's smug smirk grew to unbearable proportions. Danny cursed his inability to wipe that condescending look off his enemy's face.

Danny huffed, and broke eye-contact with the man. "Do you have a point, Plasmius, or are you just exercising your fruitloop tendencies?"

Vlad's smirk slipped, if only slightly, but Danny mentally patted himself on the back for the small victory. "As a matter of fact, dear boy," Vlad said. "I do. Like always, you are naïvely unaware of the circumstances surrounding you. As the best man, there are certain duties you will be obligated to perform, the least of which is a speech you will have to give at the reception."

Danny's stomach knotted unpleasantly. "A-a speech?"

"Indeed." Vlad's smirk returned at full strength. "And not only will you have to stand before the _entire_ ghost population, the speech must also consist of compliments and well-wishes for the newlywed couple. You will be expected to regale the audience with humorous exploits you and the groom have experienced together, and you will have to praise the groom and his bride—separately and as a couple."

Danny licked his dry lips, focusing on keeping his breathing steady. He could speak before the human population if necessary, but something about giving a speech in front of his enemies made his stomach rebel unpleasantly. _It's just a small speech, _he told himself. _Nothing worth freaking out over. _His stomach rumbled, as in in disagreement, because it wasn't _just_ a speech. It was a speech of _lies_.

The boy shook his head forcefully. "Eh, whatever. I can handle some lame speech—"

"But that is not all that's expected of a best man, Daniel," Vlad cut in. "If the groom should get cold feet for whatever reason, it falls on you to boost his confidence once again. You must also regulate the proceedings of the wedding—ensure everything is running smoothly. One such duty that falls under this category is to keep the guests from fighting."

"Peacekeeper," Danny said. "I'm going to be the _peacekeeper_ here?"

"Essentially. But you must also _entertain_ the guests."

Danny's nose wrinkled. "Oh, well, that'll be fun…" How was he supposed to entertain a room full of ghosts without allowing them to fight?

"Finally starting to see the severity of the situation?" Vlad asked.

"Getting there, yes." Danny glanced at the Box Ghost, who was still giggling and muttering about how he was an evil mastermind. "Can't I just, you know, refuse?"

Vlad chuckled. "I'm afraid not, Daniel. The Box Ghost's decision is as binding as the Orbs of Attendance."

Danny jerked his gaze back to Vlad. "The Orbs are binding?"

"An Orb announces your arrival, but it also confines you to the room until all proceedings are completed. Didn't I mention it before?" Danny's eyes narrowed at Vlad's mock innocent tone. "How terribly forgetful I am today! Perhaps if you had allowed me to give you a thorough history lesson, I would have remembered to mention it..."

Danny growled in the back of his throat. The throne room was as large as his school's football field, but suddenly the space between the walls felt insufficient in containing him and his archenemy. And once the last few stragglers arrived, the room would be filled to the brim with ghosts who hated his existence. He knew coming to the dang party was a bad idea…

"…so I hope you brought your wedding gift along," Vlad was saying.

Danny blinked. "What? Gift? I didn't bring a gift!"

Vlad truly looked shocked this time. "Surely you must have known about the age-old tradition? Even you can't be that ignorant."

The young hero scowled. "For your information, I knew very well you're supposed to bring a gift to a wedding. I was just rushed in here so fast I didn't have a chance to grab one. It's not a big deal, is it?"

Vlad sighed. "If you were a regular guest, then no. But seeing as you are the best man, I can see complications arising."

"What kind of complications?"

"The unpleasant kind."

"That doesn't exactly tell me a whole lot, Vlad."

"I'm worried the details would frighten you, dear boy."

"Oh please. You couldn't scare me if you jumped out of my closet yelling, 'Boo!' …Uh, actually, that might do it, so my closet is off limits to you, old man."

"I assure you, Daniel, I have no desire to go anywhere near your closet."

"Good, because I have no qualms about setting Cujo on your cat."

"You wouldn't _dare_!"

"You want to bet?"

Frostbite cleared his throat, and Danny jumped, having forgotten the large ghost was still nearby. "You are not required to present a gift right away, Great One. Although if I may suggest, I believe a sculpture created from your own ice powers may be suitable."

Danny smiled. "Thanks, but I don't—"

"NO!" the voices of the Far Frozen ghosts rang out, and a few even fled the vicinity.

"Oh, come on!" Danny shouted, throwing his hands into the air. "I've gotten better at it!"

The furry ghosts flinched, staring at his upraised hands with wide eyes. Danny slowly lowered them, insulted, and yet secretly amused when their eyes followed the movement. He was tempted to allow his hands to glow blue, but he didn't think Frostbite would appreciate him frightening his people.

"Why are they afraid of you, Mr. Phantom?" Lance questioned.

Danny rubbed the back of his neck, chuckled. "Well, the Far Frozen taught me how to use my ice powers, and, uh, well…I didn't have the best aim during practice…"

"You can say that again," one the yetis murmured.

"But you have better control of your ice powers now, right?" Lance asked.

"Yup."

"What other powers do you poses?"

"I—"

The Box Ghost shot toward Lance until only a few inches separated him from the human's camera. "WHO ARE YOU?" Lance jumped back, and his scream caught in his throat, producing a high-pitched hiccup. In a quieter, curious voice, the Box Ghost continued, "You appear familiar to me, do I know you?"

Lance's eyes shifted around nervously, his face pale. "Uh, I, uh…"

Danny floated in between the two. "Um, Mr. Thunder, this is—"

"THE BOX GHOST!" the Box Ghost shouted. "THE ALMIGHTY RULER OF ALL THINGS SQUARE AND CARDBOARD!"

"Don't forget bubble wrap," Dani added.

"Oh yeah. AS WELL AS THE BUBBLE WRAP OF EVERLASTING _TURMOIL_! TREMBLE BEFORE YOUR _DOOM_!"

Danny sighed. "Yeah…He's the groom. Box Ghost, this is Lance Thunder—the weather reporter from Amity Park News."

"Weather reporter?" Box Ghost asked. "I do not know any _weather_ reporter! How is it that I recognize him from somewhere?"

"The News Station pretty much uses him as their go-to guy whenever they have breaking news regarding ghosts," Danny said. "They asked him to film your wedding. And, um, you probably saw him during your little incident with Pandora's 'Evil Box'…"

The Box Ghost squinted at Lance, humming softly to himself, and the human shifted uneasily on his feet. "You weren't the human who labeled me with the totally inaccurate and UN-terrifying name the Caterer Ghost, were you?"

"Uh…" Lance always _thought_ of him as the Caterer Ghost, but he didn't need to know that. "No?"

The ghost floated a little closer, his stare growing more intense. "Did you tremble?"

What the…? "Yes?"

A large grin split the Box Ghost's face. "I MADE THE HUMAN TREMBLE!" His throat produced what sounded like a cross between a chuckle and a giggle. "I AM TERRIFYING!"

"It's not like that was a big accomplishment, Box Ghost," Danny said. "I mean, he's really easy to frighten." Lance threw the hero a betrayed look, to which Danny held up his hands in a show of innocence. "What? It's true…"

The Box Ghost gazed at Lance in increased interest. "He is?" he asked, an evil grin spreading his lips.

Although Lance had certainly seen more intimidating specters than the Box Ghost on this little trip, he still felt the need to shuffle behind Danny for protection. "I should have taken that job in Chicago…" Danny heard him whisper.

Danny allowed his eyes to drift over their surroundings, noting the ghosts watching their group, the ghosts ignoring their group, and the few ghosts staring at the camera in Lance's hand with way too much interest for Danny's comfort. The teen hero bit his lip. _I wish you had too…_

_How am I going to escape this mess with my secret still intact?_

* * *

**What? Setting Danny up to fail? I would never!**

**...Okay, maybe a little :P**

**Not the best chapter (it was a pain in the butt - nerds were particularly annoying, as was the Box Ghost - and the description is deplorable XP) but I have finally finished the setup (give or take). Rejoice, folks! The fun begins next chapter ;)  
-If there's a question you want Lance to ask Danny or any other ghost, now would be a good time to tell me.  
**

**Question: Should I change the summary for this fic? Dragon doesn't think so, but I want to know what you guys think. This is the summary I came up with so far:**

******Ghost Zone Experience:** Lance Thunder is in for an experience of a lifetime when the undead drag him into their realm to film the holy matrimony of two ghosts. If only his boss cared less about the secrets surrounding Danny Phantom, and more about Lance's continued existence…

**Please tell me what you think! I'm up for revising it.  
**

**Thanks for reading! Review, please, and I'll get back to you as soon as I can (or, at the very least, right before I post the next chapter).**


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